Today I saw the biggest unicelular organism to have ever existed. It was about 8cm in diameter.
There was once a scientist doing research on some microscopic organisms. To his surprise he found out that a particular species was completely homosexual.
What's a flowing water with living organisms called?
Today on the bus I sat next to a man who was an expert on fungal organisms. The whole time he was talking to me all I could think was...
Watching The Discovery Channel, I learned which garden organism has the dirtiest job...
Who was the first microscopic organism to circumnavigate the earth?
What sort of organisms do composers hate?
Cause they're de-composers.
What did the cytologist say to his fellow cytologist, whose job is to transfer bran cereal to cells and who specializes in multi-celled organisms, when he asked what his job was?
To the tiny organisms upon which the blue whale feeds, the whale appears to be a stone cold kriller.
Dad joke escalation
Dad was visiting last week, talking about his household projects he did. He mentioned that he got his septic tank emptied before winter, and that 'it was a shitty job'. He then tells me that his neighbor also had to get his tank emptied, so the service truck also emptied the neighbor's tank at the same time. He smiles and says, "Well, my neighbor and I finally got our shit together!"
He said he was very proud of himself for making an original pun like that. I patted him on the shoulder, looked him in the eye and said, "I can always appreciate an organic pun."
Blood and Organ related puns please
So a colleague is leaving my work (transfusion medicine lab) to work as an information manager for the organ transplant service. I make cards and I’m trying to think up something punny to write on/in his card and I’ll paint a picture on the front for context. I was thinking like “bloody good luck” or “sorry you’re transplanting”... but less shitty!
Thanks in advance :)
I tried to organize a professional Hide and Seek tournament, but it was a complete failure.
Good players are hard to find.
The reason there is so few organ donors is
What do you call an organized alligator?
I don't know, but you better not mess with it!
How does Santa organize his list?
He puts it in elf-abetical order.
How do astronomers organize a banquet?
I read a story about twin brothers born with a single body and shared organs.
Age 6 they were separated in a successful 13hr surgery. Later in life they went to prison for armed robbery. They served 10yrs. Afterwards they wrote their book about being ex-con joined twins.
How does NASA organize a party?
What External Organ does an Owl use to Breathe?
Dwayne Johnson paid me to clean up and organize his craft room, but sadly, I lost his scrapbook cutting tool.
I lost the Rock’s paper scissors.
What do you call a mediocre member of organized crime?
Man #1: "Sir, would you like a pamphlet about our organization?
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no wifi and couldn’t find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
I used to disagree with organ transplants...
...but I've had a change of heart.
During an organ donation how do doctors decide which kidney to pick?
They pick the right one.
That way there's still one left
Clerk at the DMV: Do you want to be an organ donor?
Me, every single time without fail: Sure, but not right now. I’ve got stuff to do today.
The World Health Organization announced dogs cannot contract COVID-19 and indicated they should no longer be quarantined.
I know a surgeon that puts organs back in upsidedown
I told him that's not funny but he said it was an inside joke.
I’ve started an organization that grants scholarships to former armed services individuals that want to become animal doctors. Grantees are awarded based on an interview process.
I call it “Best bets for vetting vets for vets”
What do you call a guinea pig that partakes in organized crime?
When I promise to come up with an organ transplant pun.
"If organ trafficking is illegal...."
"Then what about pianos?"
Question: How does the insulin organ maximise surface area?
It has a lot of pan-creases.
Organic chemistry is difficult.
Those who study it have alkynes of troubles.
The World Health Organization has declared that dogs cannot transmit the Corona Virus and should not be quarantined any longer.
W.H.O. Lets the dogs out!
When you die which organ is the last to go?
They eyes because they di-late
Did you know an elephants sex organs are in its feet?
If one steps on you your fucked.
I asked my boss if he would donate to my organization that provides medical support to Asian children with terminal diseases so they don’t have to be put down.
He hasn’t responded yet, but when he does I’ll find out if he supports youth in Asia.
Me: Dude! Come with me to the storage! I organized all the philosophy theses into plastic boxes with hanging files!
Unimpressed Friend: So, Crates...
A friend of mine got an organ transplant recently
His life is now organized.
Isn't atheism a Non Prophet Organization?
What’s the name of the contract organ donors have to sign
Why is organizing a professional hide-and-seek tournament hard?
It's hard to find good players.
I tried to organize a professional Hide and Seek tournament, but it was a complete disaster.
Good players are hard to find.
It takes guts to be an organ donor.
It takes real guts to become an organ donor.