Today I saw the biggest unicelular organism to have ever existed. It was about 8cm in diameter.

It was an absolute unit.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HotWilbury
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
There was once a scientist doing research on some microscopic organisms. To his surprise he found out that a particular species was completely homosexual.

They're algae.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DarkDeathDragon
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
What's a flowing water with living organisms called?

A livestream.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nexxus25
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Today on the bus I sat next to a man who was an expert on fungal organisms. The whole time he was talking to me all I could think was...

That is not a fungi.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/talesOfTheNow
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Watching The Discovery Channel, I learned which garden organism has the dirtiest job...

The Mike Rowe organism.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PotBuzz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Insides of organisms are toasty πŸ˜‚

You won't understand it. It's an inside joke.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AryaVishe2021
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Who was the first microscopic organism to circumnavigate the earth?

Ferdinand Flagellum

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptainRogers1226
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2017
🚨︎ report
What sort of organisms do composers hate?

Fungi. Why? Cause they're de-composers.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BrainySaber
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the cytologist say to his fellow cytologist, whose job is to transfer bran cereal to cells and who specializes in multi-celled organisms, when he asked what his job was?

Eukaryotes.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spendexx
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2015
🚨︎ report
To the tiny organisms upon which the blue whale feeds, the whale appears to be a stone cold kriller.

No, that's it.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigoldgeek
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2015
🚨︎ report
Organic puns in r/funny
πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OpenSourcePro
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2018
🚨︎ report
Dad joke escalation

Dad was visiting last week, talking about his household projects he did. He mentioned that he got his septic tank emptied before winter, and that 'it was a shitty job'. He then tells me that his neighbor also had to get his tank emptied, so the service truck also emptied the neighbor's tank at the same time. He smiles and says, "Well, my neighbor and I finally got our shit together!"

He said he was very proud of himself for making an original pun like that. I patted him on the shoulder, looked him in the eye and said, "I can always appreciate an organic pun."

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fish-Dead
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2016
🚨︎ report
I tried to organize a professional Hide and Seek tournament, but it was a complete failure.

Good players are hard to find.

πŸ‘︎ 17k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Organs
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spinnaker190
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
How does Santa organize his list?

He puts it in elf-abetical order.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DoctorMasterBates
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Lmao
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mxrxx_ag
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
How do astronomers organize a banquet?

They Planet

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/txson1836
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Organic Chemistry Pun
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mundanecarrot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I read a story about twin brothers born with a single body and shared organs.

Age 6 they were separated in a successful 13hr surgery. Later in life they went to prison for armed robbery. They served 10yrs. Afterwards they wrote their book about being ex-con joined twins.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoshWithaQ
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
How does NASA organize a party?

They planet ; )

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/livinloud2015
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What External Organ does an Owl use to Breathe?

Who Knows.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Parv05
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a mediocre member of organized crime?

A mafiososo.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tfowler11
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Dwayne Johnson paid me to clean up and organize his craft room, but sadly, I lost his scrapbook cutting tool.

I lost the Rock’s paper scissors.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dasbett311
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Man #1: "Sir, would you like a pamphlet about our organization?

Man #2: "Bro, sure."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boodahbellie
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no wifi and couldn’t find the information I wanted.

I wound up using cellular.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BaconShrimpEyes
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Organic labeling

is horse shit.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/avtarius
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to disagree with organ transplants...

...but I've had a change of heart.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
During an organ donation how do doctors decide which kidney to pick?

They pick the right one.

That way there's still one left

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/viky_boy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Clerk at the DMV: Do you want to be an organ donor?

Me, every single time without fail: Sure, but not right now. I’ve got stuff to do today.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chrisoatkins
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
The World Health Organization announced dogs cannot contract COVID-19 and indicated they should no longer be quarantined.

WHO let the dogs out.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
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I know a surgeon that puts organs back in upsidedown

I told him that's not funny but he said it was an inside joke.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UnsafestNumber
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ve started an organization that grants scholarships to former armed services individuals that want to become animal doctors. Grantees are awarded based on an interview process.

I call it β€œBest bets for vetting vets for vets”

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Which kidney to take?
πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/steeltitan1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a guinea pig that partakes in organized crime?

A hamster

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ngeelow
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Very organ ized
πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/getyeetedbwoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
🚨︎ report
When I promise to come up with an organ transplant pun.

I de-liver

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Question: How does the insulin organ maximise surface area?

It has a lot of pan-creases.

Sorry.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dunnonauker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
"If organ trafficking is illegal...."

"Then what about pianos?" -my dad

πŸ‘︎ 379
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alpha_greenwood
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Organic chemistry is difficult.

Those who study it have alkynes of troubles.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheIndrajitKar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
The World Health Organization has declared that dogs cannot transmit the Corona Virus and should not be quarantined any longer.

W.H.O. Lets the dogs out!

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rgapinski
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know an elephants sex organs are in its feet?

If one steps on you your fucked.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/midgetgamer27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
When you die which organ is the last to go?

They eyes because they di-late

πŸ‘︎ 70
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jackknifejimmy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my boss if he would donate to my organization that provides medical support to Asian children with terminal diseases so they don’t have to be put down.

He hasn’t responded yet, but when he does I’ll find out if he supports youth in Asia.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/srirachase
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Me: Dude! Come with me to the storage! I organized all the philosophy theses into plastic boxes with hanging files!

Unimpressed Friend: So, Crates...

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pippingigi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine got an organ transplant recently

His life is now organized.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
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Isn't atheism a Non Prophet Organization?

Ba dump tsssss

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
It takes real guts to become an organ donor.
πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/slice29
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to organize my change by putting each coin into their respective cage, but someone stole all the nickles!

Now I have a nickleless cage...

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Einetio
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
🚨︎ report
FBI has just announced about a mole on their organization. They are consulting Harry Potter about the situation

since he is good at catching snitches

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/doktorstrange7
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is organizing a professional hide-and-seek tournament hard?

It's hard to find good players.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KomodoJo3
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried to organize a professional Hide and Seek tournament, but it was a complete disaster.

Good players are hard to find.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
It takes guts to be an organ donor.
πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2019
🚨︎ report

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