"If organ trafficking is illegal...."

"Then what about pianos?" -my dad

πŸ‘︎ 377
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Alpha_greenwood
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15
🚨︎ report
What’s the name of the contract organ donors have to sign

ORGANized dismissal

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ROLLTIDE2006
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09
🚨︎ report
When you die which organ is the last to go?

They eyes because they di-late

πŸ‘︎ 71
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jackknifejimmy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25
🚨︎ report
it takes some guts to be an organ donor
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gid__rainey
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30
🚨︎ report
It takes real guts to become an organ donor.
πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/slice29
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24
🚨︎ report
No matter how we pitched the human organs to the other team, they'd swing and miss...

They didn't even bat an eye.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03
🚨︎ report
I accidentally injured my girlfriend with a mouth organ.

I didn't mean to harm Monica.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13
🚨︎ report
My dad was an organ player at basketball games, one time something got stuck on the organ and it made such a loud sound he sadly died.

The death was listed as β€œorgan failure”

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/benyou34
πŸ“…︎ May 03
🚨︎ report
If Morgan Freeman pledges to donate his organs after death, his name after he dies will be M Freeman.
πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/eshareth
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29
🚨︎ report
Did you know that the first ever balloons were made out of animal intestines and organs?

That means the first balloons weren't balloon animals, but ballooned animals.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Roivas14
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17
🚨︎ report
Do you know what the primary olfactory organ is?

No sΓ©.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wbchen
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Why don't they have as many used organs at Goodwill as used baby grand pianos?

It's hard to find organ donors.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JasonInNJ
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27
🚨︎ report
Why did the fish accept its death after losing its respiratory organs?

Because it lost the gill to live.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05
🚨︎ report
The discovery of taste buds in the male reproductive organs

gives a new meaning to the word tasty-cles

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bb-m
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17
🚨︎ report
I was moving and had no room in my apartment for my organ so i gave it to my neighbors...

Does this make me an organ donor?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
🚨︎ report
Everytime I get asked if I'm a organ donor...

I reply with why does it matter what state I donate to?

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/-JustARedHerring
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the kidney say to the other organs once he enunciated them into his cult?

Urine.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/oliverb352007
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I have some deep-seated regret for covering my organs in gold.

I have internalized gilt.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ToastGhost18
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm giving an organ recital in St Paul's Cathedral this weekend...

I'll be covering the heart, lungs and liver.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pand57
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
🚨︎ report
If there's one thing I know about organ harvesting

it takes guts

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SumdiLumdi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s the biggest organ?

Uh... A church organ.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/I_heart_canada_jk
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
You know, the heart’s the hungriest organ.

It has the heartiest appetite.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AwkwardGhost121
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the motto of people who harvest organs?

We de-liver

πŸ‘︎ 506
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zenpod
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2018
🚨︎ report
Organ donors deliver.

Or dekidney, deheart, whatever it is they're donating.

πŸ‘︎ 188
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/spankleberry
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2019
🚨︎ report
It really takes guts to be an organ donor.
πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Avartes
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Organ Freeman
πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
The brain is an amazing organ

it really makes you think

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mlopes
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I tapped my 11 year old son’s knee yesterday and said β€œwhat organ is this?” He said β€œumm, my leg?” I said β€œnope it’s your kid knee”.
πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ramalamahamjam
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I gave my organ to the Salvation Army.

Does that make me an Organ Donor?

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between "organ harvesting" and "organic harvesting?

Oh, .... I see.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PotBuzz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
My dad signed me up for organ donation

He's a man after my own heart.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/redrockit06
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Fast Organ Delivery
πŸ‘︎ 481
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/posittron
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2018
🚨︎ report
I ordered a chicken online, when it came it was missing two organs.

I guess it was delivered.

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pig-o-DooM
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2018
🚨︎ report
For years I was against organ transplants

Then I had a change of heart

πŸ‘︎ 113
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/extruderalert
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Organ Plushies
πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SebRydahl
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2018
🚨︎ report
My mail order bride arrived today, deceased. The coroner's report noted she was missing an organ...

and the company refused to refund my purchase because it had already been de-livered.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2019
🚨︎ report
I had originally considered being an organ donor

But my heart’s just not in it

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/stefanopolis
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Tried to sell an organ at a yardsale.No takers so I donated it to a local charity.

Now I'm an organ donor

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I used to be opposed to being an organ donor...

But then I had a change of heart!!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What organ do you have 4 of as a kid?

Kidneys, 2 Kidneys and 2 Kid-Knees

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/QuantumTardigrade
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
My reed organ never seems to play the right notes...

I guess it wasn’t manufactured in accordionce with the standards.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fluffyglof
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Google says the first lung transplant took place in 1954, making it the first organ donation ever. However, this is not entirely true.

The first Oregon donation took place in 1859.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dyloneus
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What are your opinions on the two organs that are attatched to the arms?

I think they're quite handy.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2018
🚨︎ report
If the U.S gave Oregon to Canada would they be organ donors
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ClaymoreG
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the pirate practice on the organ?

Arrrrrpeggios

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cantankerousrat
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2018
🚨︎ report
I would tell you something about your internal organs but...

...You wouldn’t get it; it’s an inside joke.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2018
🚨︎ report
What's a goat's favorite organ?

A Kid-ney

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IcyEevee412
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
There’s no real easy way to do an organ transplant.

As long as you have the heart to do it, you’ll be fine!

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/x3astu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Which body organ loves life the most?

The Liver

πŸ‘︎ 175
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zeitbomb
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2017
🚨︎ report
Where’s the best place to hear organ music?

The Kidney Opera House.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dens382
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2018
🚨︎ report
When I was a kid I was In a terrible car accident that nearly killed all of my organs except one.....

That’s the liver.....

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Leaveit2Deaver
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
🚨︎ report
Sure my dad didn't write this, but it was always one of his favorites. The organs were having a meeting...

"Did I ever tell you about the asshole?"

"What?"

"Well, the asshole was at a meeting with all of the other body parts, and they were deciding who should be in charge of the whole body, right? So first, the brain says, 'C'mon, obviously I should be the boss. I do all of the decisions, thinking--why is this even a question?'

'Well, good luck doing all of the thinking if you can't see where you're going,' say the eyes. 'We should be in charge.'

'What good is it going to do seeing, if you can't get anywhere?' asked the legs.

'Well, without us, you'd have no oxygen,' said the lungs.

'Are you serious?' said the stomach. 'How are you supposed to process energy and do any of this stuff, without me??'

'Well, what about me?' piped up the asshole. 'I'm important too..'

'You?!?' laughed the other parts. 'Shut up, asshole!'

So the asshole went on strike.

A week and a half later, the brain couldn't think straight. The eyes couldn't focus, the legs were asleep from sitting on the

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 733
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/paprikashi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2015
🚨︎ report
Let's all take a moment to appreciate organ donors

It takes guts to do what they do.

πŸ‘︎ 224
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2017
🚨︎ report
People say the appendix is a useless organ..

But how are you meant to find yourself within if you don't have one?

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Wythneth
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2018
🚨︎ report
I love internal organ humour.

Because they are inside jokes

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2018
🚨︎ report
I used to have an aunt who played the mouth organ.

It was our Monica!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Willfreckles
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2017
🚨︎ report
Is lower back considered an organ?

Because it's definitely not a piano

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrToastyToast
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2018
🚨︎ report
I used to have a driver's license from Arizona. They had a neat symbol on them if you opted in to be an organ donor.

I don't live in AZ anymore, but you know what they say, once a donor always Sedona!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/clit_or_us
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2018
🚨︎ report
My dinner tonight consisted of the internal organs and entrails of a butchered animal.

It was offal.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RandomDrunk88
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2017
🚨︎ report
How did the nervous female organ that was going to Hollywood feel?

They were overreacting.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2016
🚨︎ report
What do you call an ex-comedy-central comedian's favorite organ?

The John Oliver

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheTeaPod
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2017
🚨︎ report
I asked my dad why he wasnt an organ donor

He said it's because he only has pianos.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/speedlimits65
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Catholic's card-playing organ?

The holy euchre wrist.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zombie-narwhals
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2017
🚨︎ report
Dad just proudly told me his brother has signed up to be an organ donor

Dad: He suggested that I registered too

Me: oh yeah, will you?

Dad: Maybe, he's a man after my own heart after all

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Roro_Zoro
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2016
🚨︎ report
Pipe organ
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheCat5001
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2014
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a hard playing pianist and an organ?

A sex joke.

As an upcoming new dad, first kid expected in May, I am getting my practice in!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thestamp
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2014
🚨︎ report
Playing organs

Walked in on my roommate listening to All of Me by John Legend whole touching his stomach with each piano note.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"I'm playing my organs with the song," he said.

A massive groan ensued.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/marshallu2018
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2015
🚨︎ report
Organ Donor

Mom: Are you an organ donor? Dad: No, but I've been thinking about donating our piano.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gandhi2069
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2014
🚨︎ report
Animal Organs

> Me: Dad, could you please test me on Animal Organs for my biology exam? > >Dad: Sure. Do you play play them standing up, or sitting down?

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cygw1n
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2014
🚨︎ report
It takes guts to be an organ donor.
πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2019
🚨︎ report
It takes guts to be an organ donor
πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HenriBoneu
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
🚨︎ report
It takes guts to be an organ donor.
πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.