Any good french toast puns?
My grandfather just walked into the room with a guy wearing skinny jeans and eating avocado toast.
I said, “Who is this guy?”
My grandfather: That’s my hip replacement.
What do you call it when you only have a little butter left and you use it all on one last piece of toast?
How does a monkey make toast?
What kind of people hate toast?
People who are lactoast intolerant.
What do you call a piece of magical toast?
Did you hear about the piece of toast at the Zoo?
It was bread in captivity
When I woke up this morning, I saw a bird of prey sitting in my backyard eating avocado toast.
It was a millennial falcon.
My sister becomes physically ill when I burn her toast.
It turns out she's black-toast-intilerant.
How does Darth Vader like his toast?
I always have toast for breakfast.
Because I’m lack-toast-intolerant.
I went to the zoo the other day. One of the new exhibits was a piece of toast in a cage. I asked the zookeeper "what's that all about?" He said...
If you've toasted bread, you've bred toast.
What do cars put on their toast for breakfast?
What do you call an Ignorant Piece of Toast
Gentlemen, a toast.
To bread! Because without bread, there would be no toast.
Sneezed all over my toast.
Can’t believe it snot butter...
My girlfriend usually has peanut butter toast for breakfast, but this morning we were out of bread, and she’s been grouchy all day.
I never knew she was lack-toast intolerant.
I made some French toasts for my kids
I made some toast and refused to give our little doggo a bite. My kids asked why she looked so sad...
I told them she was lack-toast intolerant.
I was disappointed in the synonym toast,
because it was just warm bread.
My son helped me out with this one. What do doors spread on their toast?
Jamb.
Thanks u/rerunthedj
Zuul asks Peter Venkman if he wants to wreck up a city and toast marshmallows in the flames.
Venkman says, "Nah, I'm not a big marshmallow guy."
I like Synonym Toast Crunch.
It's tasty. And yummy as well.
I had some delicious honey on my toast this morning.
Later as I walked past the hive where it came from I said "Thank you bees for making the best honey in the world." A few shouted back "It's good but we wouldn't say it was the best honey in the world."
Oh I thought, they must be humble bees.
Hey look, it is Toast Malone.
Why did Bill get mad at John after John ate all of his toast?
Because he's Lack Toast Intolerant.
I’m not sure if I like toast.
On the upside, it’s buttered. But on the downside, it’s not.
Whenever I eat burnt toast it makes me feel sick.
I guess I’m just black toast intolerant.
My battery died when I was recording my wife giving a toast at her parents’ 50th wedding anniversary.
Now I’m never going to hear the end of it.
Some people like in Toad in the Hole, but I like my eggs a toast boat.
Unfortunately, it can only be bought in a bay kery.
My grandpa just came over to my house with a young guy wearing skinny jeans and eating avocado toast. Miffed, I questioned, “Who's this guy?” Gramps chuckled and replied, "Who, him?"
"This is my hip replacement!"
"I'd like to have a toast" said the father-in-law at his daughters wedding
"Add some jam on it," he continued
(Smh this wasn't appreciated enough at r/jokes)
Me: I lost a piece of toast at the zoo.
My friend: so it’s bread in captivity?
Me: crying no it landed on the sidewalk.
Just found out why my toast kept getting burnt
My toaster had pop-up blocker on.
What spread do astronauts use on their toast?
My wife says I shouldn't put so much jelly on my toast
But I can't help it, that shit's my jam
I'm a trucker. My dispatcher texted me to ask if I'd picked up a load of frozen toast. This was my response...
20,000lb of frozen bread so clearly I'm loafing along and a gluten for punishment.
Bad puns are the yeast of my problems. This load takes me to the upper crust, but if I don't get it in on time I'm toast!
Sorry about my rye sense of humor...
I had a stack of 52 slices of toast this morning.
I ate an entire deck of carbs!
I went to the zoo yesterday and I saw a piece of toast in a cage.
When I asked the keeper why, he said, "It was bread in captivity!"
I woke up this morning and saw a bird of prey in my backyard eating avocado toast and yelling “Ok Boomer!”
It was a millennial falcon.
I went to my backyard and saw a bird of prey eating avocado toast.
It was a millennial falcon.
I went to the zoo today and saw a piece of toast in a cage? The zoo keeper told me...
That it's bread in captivity.
Sorry.
How does Darth Vader like his toast?
On the dark side... This joke was a little forced.
How does Darth Vader like his toast?
A little on the dark side
I went to my backyard this morning, and I saw a bird of prey eating avocado toast.
It was a millennial falcon.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
