The head veterinarian at a zoo noticed something alarming in a patient’s record. A monkey that had been a healthy weight at its last checkup was now recorded as being only half that.
Fearing for the monkey’s health, he went and saw it, expecting it to be sickly and skeletal. However, the monkey seemed totally normal. Confused told his staff to weigh the monkey again.
They did, but the number they reported was still astonishingly low. Sure it was a mistake, he went to weigh the monkey for himself. But when he put the monkey on the scale, it showed a number that was still far too low, and couldn’t possibly be right.
After a moment he spotted the problem: behind the scale was a grab bar on the wall, and the monkey had stealthily grabbed it with its tail, and was supporting some of its weight off the scale that way.
So the monkey's weight was fine, they just weren't paying attention to de tail.
Expunge Bob
It was his vinyl request.
Your truck comes back, your wife comes back, your dog comes back, your trailer isn’t flooded...
She grabs a cup of hot cocoa and watches through the window as he fills the bucket up with water and races from the back of the house all the way out to the front yard and out of sight. She bundles up and goes outside to get a closer look and sees that he’s cleared the snow from the sidewalk. She watches as he takes his bucket of water and pours it out on the cold concrete. She’s puzzled for a second and then says:
Icy, what you did there.
In his stu-stu-studio
He thinks I'm a riceist for saying that.
..but I've already got that one.
It was his vinyl resting place
It has been 43 years and I still cannot solve it.
But I love their greatest hits!
Roxanne...
Edit-spelling
It was a real big dill!
He said "You need help."
"I've got that one." I replied.
For the World’s Youngest Human Being.
Because they go “pew pew pew”.
Its the vinyl countdown
HeHe
In the ark hives
It was broken by a 28 year old Russian
His name is Torehis Sackov
It’s a joint project.
I have a serious Substance abuse problem
I tried to get a refund. But I couldn't get my NickleBack.
I think I might have broken it!
Then the librarian told me to take it out.
He took a shortcut.
He keeps a log of every tree cuts down.
To be sure. I’ll let myself out.....
is he considered a recording artist?
This is a new low.
Beatlejuice
He sleighed Christmas this year.
I think she watches the highlights later.
Because 2 was better suited for PRIMEtime
I just can't get over it
Now I want to break three.
I have such a smart watch
But I love their Greatest hits !
"Sounds like you need help." "No, I already have that one."
It's his vinyl request
