A locksmith had to go to court to give evidence last week.

Apparently he was the key witness.

Stolen from dad jokes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bmantis311
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09
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I have evidence that Robin Hood is aromantic and asexual.

He's an arrow ace.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RoyalRaven14
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26
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I went to the museum and saw a painting of a criminal, who claimed his innocence and insisted the police planted evidence.

The frame was remarkable

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Strungen
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
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What evidence? imgur.com/3xJKA22
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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Johnny Depp has lost his case against The Sun newspaper even with evidences

Hard to win if Amber is Heard and Johnny is not

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryonnsan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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The coffee shop kept samples of burnt coffee as evidence to fire their roaster.

It was used as grounds for dismissal.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/turbodeeznuts
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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Pretty solid evidence.
πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coadnamedalex
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2018
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When I tried to admit new evidence to the trial, the judge threw a Granny Smith at me...

I then remembered it's an apple-late court.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
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Scientists recently uncovered evidence of a dinosaur that loved to lift weights.

They've decided to call it hella sore.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tutor78
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
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[In court] Judge: After seeing all the evidence, I am sending you to jail.

Defendant: Say-you-did-what.

Judge: What did you say?

Defendant: Thanks for reversing my sentence.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
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Recent evidence shows that Earth’s magnetic field is weakening.

Yes. It’s true. Current events have made it less attractive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/holymolybreath
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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I found some concrete evidence.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_PoodlePants
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2019
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Concrete evidence
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πŸ‘€︎ u/g1ver
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2019
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we’ve got some concrete evidence
πŸ‘︎ 57
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThomyboyGaming
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
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She has evidence.
πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bassieenadriaan1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2019
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Concrete evidence
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πŸ‘€︎ u/French-dudev2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
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What does a lawyer wear in court to handle evidence after dark?

Night-trial gloves

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wizard7926
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
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My boss is making me dig through a stack of hay bare-handed to look for anything that shouldn’t be there. I suspect he dropped his wedding ring while having an affair with the new girl he hired in the pile and now he is desperate to hide the evidence from his wife who might be on to him.

But I’m just grasping at straws here.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Propagansus
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2019
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Concrete evidence that kids are indeed stupid.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EpicBro16
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2019
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He had real hard evidence. reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TomDaNub3719
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2019
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My theory as to why USA and Cuba had their dispute was because of oil. Evidence you say. I just found Fidels Castrol
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Roso_124588
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2019
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What are plants that captured evidence of crime called?

Photowitnesses

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πŸ‘€︎ u/789_ba_dum_tss
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2019
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I read about one famous detective. Man was always catching criminals by simple luck. Either he would just luckily stumble across damning evidence or luckily catch the criminal in the act.

I think his name was Sheer luck Holmes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/clahws
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2019
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Once considered to be holding funerals near a dead crow, now evidence indicates that crows may be examining the body and surrounding area for potential threats to the flock.

It's a murder investigation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2018
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Did you hear they found new evidence of the missing link?

Hopefully it's not just another fossil arm.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/veektohr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2012
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Photographic evidence of a dad joke

http://i.imgur.com/uLfRhDd.jpg

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fijozico
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2016
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The found documented evidence of which knight built King Arthur's round table

It was Sir Cumference.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tuckereh
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2016
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I can't find any evidence of this pun after some searches...(OC?)

Me- I meet an interesting person the other day

Her- Oh, ok?

Me- Turns out he runs a school

Her- Not too interesting so far...

Me- Yeah, but it's a school for protons, neutrons and electrons

Her- umm, sorry, what?

Me- Yeah, but it's the Principal of the matter, you see?

eyeroll intensifies

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πŸ‘€︎ u/somethingwickednc
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2015
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Finally, some hard evidence against Donald Trump

And all it took was a pee eye.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jarritosnigga
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2017
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The prosecution in the pistorius case has come forward with new evidence

The defence is stumped

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DaintySload
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2013
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Finally read my daughter's PhD about types of wheels and none of her evidence supports her position.

Turns out she's just a spin doctor.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2014
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I can't find any evidence of this pun after some searches... (OC?)

Me- I meet an interesting person the other day

Her- Oh, ok?

Me- Turns out he runs a school

Her- Not too interesting so far...

Me- But it's a school for protons, neutrons and electrons

Her- umm, sorry, what?

Me- Yeah, but it's the Principal of the matter, you see?

eyeroll intensifies

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/somethingwickednc
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2015
🚨︎ report

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