My wife emailed me our wedding photos, but I can’t seem to open any of the files.

I always have trouble with emotional attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 415
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11
🚨︎ report
If you ever find a house with a family of corn, don’t go snooping through their secret files.

They’re cornfidential

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TeepenTeepen
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07
🚨︎ report
How do you call a Photoshop project file that gave you anxiety ?

.ptsd

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Panteros
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
🚨︎ report
Secret Files
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Radish00
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02
🚨︎ report
I used to file my nails...

But then I thought what’s the point in keeping them.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cwwspurs
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09
🚨︎ report
We once were questioning a perp who wouldn't say anything without his coarse file with cutting points instead of lines. After getting it, he immediately confessed...

He talked with a rasp.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30
🚨︎ report
What do you call 100 rabbits in a single file line marching backwards?

A receding hare line.

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ May 01
🚨︎ report
why did the coffee file a police report?

because It was mugged!

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JodeneBorg
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
What happens to the files in my Dell laptop when I smash it with a hammer?

They get Dell-eted

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sylveon10101
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10
🚨︎ report
The lions roar was so big that when I compressed it , it turned out to be a " .Rawr " file.
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jizzler_Rage_792
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got MUGGED

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DeletedForSpamm
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04
🚨︎ report
What do you file when you're out of ideas?

Brainruptcy

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/silentdumbarse
πŸ“…︎ May 05
🚨︎ report
File your nails man
πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jebbaok
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12
🚨︎ report
I don't let my kids go online. There's too many PDF files on there!
πŸ‘︎ 112
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2019
🚨︎ report
When sending files through email to my students I never send more than one per email

Soo they don't get two attached

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Udjasen
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

Because it got mugged

^PS ^sorry ^if ^this ^has ^been ^used ^before

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nico_Di_Angelo666
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15
🚨︎ report
I used Turbo Tax to file my taxes last year.

I’ll use a different service this year. I wasn’t really in to it.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/J-Z08
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14
🚨︎ report
I never file my taxes.

I’m not Intuit.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26
🚨︎ report
My parents used my Uber to go and file the application ending their marriage.

I gave the driver one star. He drove my parents to divorce.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sebfazio
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
🚨︎ report
Why did the pretzel file a police report?

Cause he got assaulted.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KillerRedPanda14
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend just emailed a file called RomeoandJuliet.doc.

It’s a play on Word.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife emailed me the pictures of our first date together, but I couldn’t open any of the files.

I have serious emotional attachment issues.

πŸ‘︎ 182
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the way two French dudes share files electronically?

Pierre to Pierre network.

πŸ‘︎ 79
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
My boyfriend had this in his car...it’s a nail file
πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Raelenerosas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife emailed me the pictures of our first trip together, but I couldn’t open any of the files.

I’ve always had trouble with emotional attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2019
🚨︎ report
How do two French guys share files electronically?

Pierre to Pierre network.

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was the hard drive scared of the large file?

Because it was a terror-byte.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/g1aurung1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do cows smell when they're standing single file waiting to be milked?

Dairy air.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mrthatsthat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Oh no! A pedo-file!
πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/comradecuber
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2019
🚨︎ report
I found an old file on my computer Romeo&Juliet.doc

Turns out that it was a play on word.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did Bach file for bankruptcy?

He was baroque

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the pistachio file a police report?

He was a-salted.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheLastHeroHere
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife emailed me a photo of our first date together, but I couldn’t open the file.

I have trouble with emotional attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 149
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee pot file a police report?

Because it got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bustielou
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife emailed me the pictures of our first trip together, but I couldn’t open any of the files.

I think I have serious emotional attachment issues.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do you file your nails?

Under 'N'

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/daliclouds
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife emailed me the pictures of our first trip together, but I couldn’t open any of the files.

I might have severe emotional attachment issues.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
🚨︎ report
You'll never guess what I found on top of the secret files.

It was the top secret file.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bhattlebone
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call 100 rabbits running away in single file?

A receding hareline

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NonstopSuperguy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Annoyed my GF so she asked Google how to file for divorce, I though I'd help imgur.com/J7bhVja
πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2018
🚨︎ report
Where does a pirate historian store his files?

In an arrrrchive.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBritishSnob
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2018
🚨︎ report
My friends secretly downloaded a 700MB exe file into my laptop.

I think it's a huge setup.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the butcher have to file for bankruptcy?

He was struggling to make hens meat

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
🚨︎ report
A group of kindergarteners stand single file, anticipating their daily juice boxes.

Punch line.

πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rahzek
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
🚨︎ report
I want to file a lawsuit against U2, but I am finding it impossible to hire a lawyer.

Either they charge a lot of money, or they are pro bono.

πŸ‘︎ 63
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy that tried to file a lawsuit against the left part of his body?

It was attempted sue-a-side.

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/clifwith1f
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Tax audit guy: It says in your file that you have money for nothing and checks for free.

Man: Am I in trouble?

Tax guy: Yes. In Dire Straits.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2018
🚨︎ report
My buddy sells office supplies, label makers, and file cabinets to the Mafia.

He is involved in very organized crime.

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a bunch of rabbits walking backwards in a single-file fashion?

A receding hare line.

πŸ‘︎ 157
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/waxattacks
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2016
🚨︎ report
Which program do Jedi use to open PDF files?

Adobe Wan Kenobi

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HHStorm21
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2018
🚨︎ report
Hello, Geek Squad? I'd like to file a bug report.
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Suprcheese
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file charges

It got mugged

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_McMuffins
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Ugh, I have a huge file to decompress. This is going to take forever.

Sigh unzips

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Socrathustra
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2018
🚨︎ report
What is the difference between your file cabinet and your kidney?

One is for your information; the other's for urine formation

πŸ‘︎ 821
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tyneesha
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2015
🚨︎ report
So Mickey Mouse went to file for divorce from Minnie..

The judge said, "I can't approve the divorce just because you think your wife is crazy."

Mickey says, "I didn't say she was crazy, I said she was fucking goofy."

Edit: autocowrecks

πŸ‘︎ 160
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FilthyMcnasty87
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2015
🚨︎ report
I was in the garage the other day and the neighbor kid threw a small file at me...

Little bastard

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MechEisoducks
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2017
🚨︎ report
How do ships share files?

Pier-to-Pier

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SkillBranch
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2017
🚨︎ report
*the X-Files theme plays* i.reddituploads.com/caaf5…
πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Comoper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2016
🚨︎ report
What does Luke Skywalker use to open .pdf files?

Adobe-Wan Kenobi.

πŸ‘︎ 68
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WeirdWonderWolfy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2017
🚨︎ report
Shit all of my word files disappeared...

who let the .docx out?

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KimJongEwww
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2017
🚨︎ report
My dad on a large file his colleague sent him

His colleague sent him a file that was 504mb, so my dad said it might take a while to download (they were on the phone). His colleague said "nah it won't be so bad right, you have an Apple too right?" My dad responded "yeah but it's an old apple, a granny smith". He was very pleased with himself

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NotJustSamOne
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2016
🚨︎ report
My computer didn't send an email with a .rar file.....

And I said that's so .RARe

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jorgeDVM
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2016
🚨︎ report
Apple devices track your steps and store them as "pedo-files"
πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hutimuti
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2016
🚨︎ report
I dad joked while watching the X-Files last night.

My friend was showing me the xfiles because I have never watched it, and during the first episode this coffin at a funeral slips and rolls down a hill and everyone chases after it.

Me "That funeral went downhill fast..." Her "...you're fucking joking right?"

Edit : Apparently not a funeral... exhuming a body. Wasn't paying attention but the sound of the coffin falling caught my attention.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ToTouchAnEmu
πŸ“…︎ Jul 16 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad asked where I keep my hand files (tool)...

In the filing cabinet, of course.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bandit04
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2017
🚨︎ report
MIT's Computer Science PhD application only accepts text files. That's really ASCII a lot, in my opinion.
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/markjamesyork
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2016
🚨︎ report
My dad was copying files from my computer

He needed some of the files, and when the copying was done, he just pulled the drive out, no safe remove or anything. So I told him "No safe remove?" and then he replied "I did safely remove it. I pulled it out slowly."

Ugh.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kmlkmljkl
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2015
🚨︎ report
My wife emailed me our wedding photos, but I couldn’t open any of the files.

I always have trouble with emotional attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report

It got mugged

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jaackyboi
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 120
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 32
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RobRoy333
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AmarSB2001
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mc_Mike_007
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

Because It got mugged!

πŸ‘︎ 178
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EMP52
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/puggoamber
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gertjan-96
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report

It got mugged

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tautvydas69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Obimark
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 116
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gamer-Citrus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BLU_INC
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/iamdoggo123
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report ?

Because it was mugged

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jimingot_yesjams
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NerdPapaya69
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sparkles22
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Some_Trap
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

Because he got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PaulinoG13
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife emailed me a photo of our first date, but I couldn’t open the file.

I have trouble with emotional attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 47
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AmarSB2001
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Method001
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WeGotRice
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2017
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.