My brother had to quit his job as a weightlifter because he wasn't strong enough.
He handed in his too weak notice yesterday.
I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because I'm not big enough or strong enough.
I've just handed in my too weak notice.
I quit my job at the concrete plant.
My job was getting harder & harder.
My new job at the nuclear reactor requires me to take anger management classes.
They're to prevent meltdowns.
I got fired from my job at Dairy Queen
Because I refused to work on sundaes
What four elements are you not allowed to bring to your job?
Nitrogen, sulfur, Fluorine, and tungsten, cause they are NSFW.
Told my wife I was quitting my job today to become an electrician
I just got a new job as a guillotine operator....
Just got a job offer at a thyme factory
i heard my dad was stealing from his roadworks job
i didnt believe it at first but when i got home all the signs were there
“I love my job!” exclaimed the farmer. “All you do is boss me around all day!” complained one of his sheep. “What did you say?” challenged the farmer. The sheep glared back and growled...
I once had a job pressing soda cans.
I started up a dating site for chickens, but it's not my main job, I'm just doing it…
How does a giraffe find a job?
At a job interview I got asked to describe myself in a nutshell
I said it's so dark I can't breathe has anyone got a nut cracker I can't breathe
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.
They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
Why did the Donkey quit his job?
You always have to keep your job exciting.
Being a well driller, I often dream I could drill right to the center of the earth.
If I didn't have such a great imagination my job would be just boring.
I got a job crushing cans, and I hate it.
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda-pressing.
I quit my job at the IRS.
What is the difference between an old bus station and a crab with a boob job?
Ones a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean
I applied for a job at Amazon.
I told them I'll arrive for the interview between 9&5.
I finally got my dream job at the guillotine factory
I’ll beheading there shortly
Edit: Thanks for the silver. My first ever award!
I don't think I'll ever find a stable job
To be honest I'm not too comfortable around horses.
What did the taxidriver say, when he lost his Will to do his Job?
Please end My Chauffeuring!
Why did the window inspector quit his job?
Hope that job doesn’t suck
Why are scarecrows so good at their jobs?
They’re outstanding in their field
I quit my elevator job
Had too many ups and downs
I cut lumber for a living, but I keep sleeping on the job.
As you can tell, I'm a slumberjack.
Getting interviewed for a job as a blacksmith: Interviewer: Do you have any experience shoeing a horse?
Me: No, but I once told a donkey to F off.
Found this today. With numbers like those she don't need an udder job
I got fired from my job at the calendar factory
All I did was take a day off
Just been offered as a job a Noise Pollution officer .
But, I had to turn it down.
A midget was in my office applying for a job. He humbly noted all the benefits of his stature regarding the job.
I still think he was selling himself short.
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda pressing.
I've just been offered a job as a human chess piece...
The money is good.
I'm on knights this week.
Do you know why nursing is a woman's job?
Because men can't breastfeed.
I conducted a study for Steve Jobs regarding the lack of evolution in his employees.
Those are Apple Bottom Genes.
I want a job just like in Inception.
Man: I’m so sorry I’m late for my ship cleaning job. What are my responsibilities?
I got promoted at my job and my new office is up in a tree house.
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
I got a job at the guillotine factory.
I'll beheading there shortly.
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