A sweater I purchased was picking up static electricity, so I returned it to the store.

They gave me another one, free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dirtybirdal
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
Did you know that it takes 3 sheep to make one sweater?

Amazing, I didn't even know they could knit.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ May 05
🚨︎ report
The sweater I bought recently kept picking up static electricity, so I returned it to the store

They gave me another one, free of charge

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ May 18
🚨︎ report
I read an article earlier that said it actually takes three sheep to make one sweater…

I didn't even know they could knit!

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16
🚨︎ report
Grandmother's hair sweater.

My mother just told me she was sending me a sweater made of my grandmother's hair. As if that isn't bothersome enough, she's also sending me the tool used to make it. Evidently, she expects my wife to make one as well, keeping with tradition.

"Mom," I said, "This is so awful. Please don't send me that stuff."

"But Ben," she says, "It's a family hair loom."

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BenTheGrey
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17
🚨︎ report
Went and bought a sweater yesterday. The thing just kept picking up static electricity.

I went to return it and they gave me another one free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 71
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ch57113
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18
🚨︎ report
What's a cop's favorite type of sweater?

A pullover.

πŸ‘︎ 136
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMasonX
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2019
🚨︎ report
If your girlfriend borrows your sweater forever

Did she jacket?

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cornelius_M
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05
🚨︎ report
I got a new sweater for Christmas, but it was picking up too much static electricity

I returned it for a new one, free of charge

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Erikg1116
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
🚨︎ report
Perfect for sweater weather

A friend of mine made a sweater out of alphabet soup and a needle.

I asked "how'd you manage that one?"

He said, "it was easy once I put together a string of letters"

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BedHeadBread
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11
🚨︎ report
The sweaters they gave to the photography students at my schoo
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ebony_man
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Me: "Honey, have you seen my sweater"?

Wife: "I think you left it in the cardigan".

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/johnnyhottub
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
🚨︎ report
The sweater I got last Christmas kept picking up static electricity, so I took it back to the store and exchanged it for another one…

…free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
The sweater I got for Christmas was picking up static electricity. So I went to the store to return it.

They gave me another one. Free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the bartender put on a sweater?

She thought it was a little drafty.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
🚨︎ report
The sweater I bought from the store was picking up static electricity, so I went back to change it.

They gave me another one, free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report
What did 50 Cent say to his grandma after she knitted him a sweater?

Gee you knit!

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the klepto only knit metal sweaters?

He had to...Steel wool.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fonebone45
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife bought me a sweater that was picking up static electricity, so I went to the store to change it.

They replaced it with a new one, free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My favorite Christmas sweater
πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Someone told me that it takes 5 sheep to make a sweater.

I didn't know they could knit!

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2019
🚨︎ report
For some reason, the cashier wanted me to steal the sweater I already owned..

She told me to swipe my cardigan.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mikeybaseball
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I paid $20 for a $50 sweater.

Does discount?

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bonanza86
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call Keanu Reeves when he has a Sweater on?

Keanu Sleeves

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Thatsmoreweird
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2019
🚨︎ report
The sweater my kids gave me last Christmas kept picking up static electricity…

So I took it back to the store and exchanged it for another one…free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2017
🚨︎ report
I got a new sweater that kept picking up static electricity.

So I took it back and exchanged it for anotherβ€”free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 355
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2018
🚨︎ report
Breaking News: A turtleneck seller is to appear in court for selling his turtlenecks to the public, and just killing so many turtles. And sweater or not he wins, he was really a bad salesman.
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BitGouda
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2019
🚨︎ report
The government should watch out for the sweater conspiracy theory.

It is a thread.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tobilub04
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2019
🚨︎ report
My grandma made me a sweater

It was pretty knit.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Papau_Dude
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I always get along with people wearing sweaters.

They’re so easy to warm up to.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kingkruti
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2018
🚨︎ report
A sweater can be an absolute ewe knit.
πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/felixswan
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2018
🚨︎ report
The sweater my kids gave me last Christmas kept picking up static electricity, so I took it back to the store and exchanged it for another one…

...free of charge...

πŸ‘︎ 131
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2018
🚨︎ report
I gave my other half a sweater for Christmas.

They really wanted a screamer or a moaner, but they got a sweater.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Uffda01
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a gambler's sweater?

A CARD-igan.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/monster6195
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you know it takes 3 sheep to make one sweater?

That’s amazing. I didn’t even know they could knit.

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/marissakalyn
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the Spanish teacher say when wearing her new wool Christmas sweater?

Fleece navidad!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife was picking feathers off my sweater...

and turns to me and asked, "have you been cheating on me with a bird?"

So I look at her right in the eye and said, "I swear... It was just a peck on the cheek."

She almost kicked me out of the house.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2014
🚨︎ report
Its 80 degrees outside and my co-worker is wearing a sweater in this heat

When I asked him about it he said "I'm just that cool"

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jormono
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Knee's weak, arms are heavy, there's vomit on his sweater already, imgur.com/artJgE7
πŸ‘︎ 44
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hanburgundy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2017
🚨︎ report
People that hand make wool sweaters are part of a tight knit group.
πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call an alligator in a v-neck sweater?

An inVESTagator

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DA_ZEUS_BOLT
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2018
🚨︎ report
Sweet old lady walks into Perkins with a home made sweater.

The sweater was made with alpaca wool and had a pattern with alpacas wrapping around her chest. It had a beautifully intricate diamond pattern of various colors and you could tell it was finely crafted.

Mom: wow, what a beautiful sweater is that made from alpaca wool?

Old lady: Yes, we have a small herd of them.

Dad: YOU HAVE A HERD OF SWEATERS?!

Old lady stares blankly into my fathers eyes not quite understanding as I’m dying.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/servuslucis
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2018
🚨︎ report
"Dad, what's the difference between a sweater and a fleece?"

"One is something you wear to keep you warm, the other is something dogs have."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Teapotsalty
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2018
🚨︎ report
What did the man say to his seamstress when he discovered a hole in his wool sweater?

"Aw, darn it!"

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2017
🚨︎ report
My coach always criticized me for not sweating enough during practice. I'm not much of a sweater.

I'm more of a corduroy jacket.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/michaeljbam
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2017
🚨︎ report
What's worse than a giraffe wearing a turtle neck sweater?

A turtle wearing a giraffe neck sweater.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dymogeek
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2017
🚨︎ report
Step dad's ugly Christmas sweater

http://imgur.com/2qEvhzq.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dbrank
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2015
🚨︎ report
TIFU by ruining my nieces knitted sweater...

Whoops, wrong thread.

πŸ‘︎ 82
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DuskStruck
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2016
🚨︎ report
Everyone is wearing ugly Christmas sweaters,

sweater you like it or not.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BioSlothInfinite
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2015
🚨︎ report
I recently bought a sweater that had some Native American-like designs on it, when my dad saw me wearing it...

Dad: "Son, I think have some reservations about that sweater."

He then began chuckling deeply for a few minutes before I gave in and joined him.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Th3Greyhound
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2013
🚨︎ report
What did the sweater get the shirt for it's birthday?

A cardagain.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EliteRanger_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2015
🚨︎ report
Ugly sweater party

My friend was trying on a sweater for an ugly sweater party and his wife said it was too awful. He decides to remove it and as he does, I say, "I don't know. I think he's pulling it off."

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/davedude82
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2015
🚨︎ report
That's a nice sweater...

Dad: That's a nice sweater. Is it felt? Me: No...I think it's cott-- Dad feels sweater Dad: Now it's felt!

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PixieDreamKate
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2014
🚨︎ report
When my dad heard there was an ugly sweater contest

"Ugly sweater contest! When I sweat I get ugly. I'm an ugly sweater.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tdrusk
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2014
🚨︎ report
I got a new sweater for Christmas, but it was picking up too much static electricity

I exchanged it for a new one, free of charge

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Erikg1116
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
🚨︎ report
A sweater I bought was picking up static electricity, so I returned it to the store.

They gave me another one, free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 345
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
🚨︎ report
A sweater I bought was picking up static electricity. So, I returned it to the store.

They gave me another one free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tttulio
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
🚨︎ report
I read an article earlier that said it actually takes three sheep to make one sweater…

I didn't even know they could knit!

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2017
🚨︎ report
I got a sweater for Christmas.

What I really wanted was a moaner or a screamer.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TKJ
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2016
🚨︎ report

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