She asked how much it was. I said "Don't worry, it was dirt cheap."
Store had it selling for dirt-cheap!
They’re both cauldron
It's about thyme.
"a watched pot never boils"
I thought hmm, there's a storm brewing
Me: “The right one” Wife: Evil Glare Me: “The wrong one?” Wife: Eviler Glare Me: Walks out of room
You can tun(a) guitar but cannot guitar a tuna
He had a very esteemed colleague.
I’ve noticed I can tell when the ocean is smoking pot lately. How can I tell? When I see that the Tide is High.
Don’t know if this counts as a dad joke.
It was the pot calling the cattle back.
Edit: Thank you for the awards.
I was expecting this to go noticed like most of my other posts. You peeps rock!
Alpaca bowl for you
I put it in the wrong place...... 3 years ago
So I buried a saucepan in my yard. I hear it takes no skillet all. Just water it with Kettle One and wok away without really frying. Hopefully it’ll produce a nice stock.
Because doing it yourself is a paste of wine.
Teapot
He got medium.
The steaks have never been higher.
It was an edible arrangement
He ask the barman: "What is this?"
The barman answer: "Oh this, place a dollar and if you make my horse laugh you can keep the pot."
"Fair enough" says the man "I'll give it a try" and then places a dollar in the pot
He walks in the stable and after a minute, the horse starts laughing and just can't seem to stop.
The man grabs the pot of change and leaves.
One week later, the man comes back to the bar and can still hear the horse laughing.
A new pot of change has been placed on the counter labeled: "Make my horse cry"
Man says: "Fair enough", place a dollar in the pot and walks again in the stable.
The horse stops laughing and starts crying
The man comes back in the bar and takes the pot of change.
Before he gets a chance to leave, the barman ask him: "How did you make him laugh so much?"
"Oh, very simple" says the man "I told him: My dick is bigger than yours"
"And how did you make him cry?" Ask the barman
"Even more simple, I showed him"
"Where's all the coffee?"
Coffee pot replies, "We were mugged."
Cannibal Leader: "What did you do before we captured you?"
Man: "I was an editor for a newspaper"
Cannibal Leader: "Soon you will be editor-in-chief"
Mankind attained its highest form of intelligence.
Everybody needed help rolling their joints
Hot cross buns.
“You can tune a guitar but you can’t tune a fish”
“What about the pot of glue”
“I knew you’d get stuck on that”
Seaweed.
“I shall leave no tern unstoned.”
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed
It's dishwasher safe!
BONGGGGGGGGG
He was a hippo pot a must. This is so dumb...I apologize now to all of you ha ha ha.
They are both cauldron.
They're both cauldron.
They're both cauldron
They're both cauldron.
They're both cauldron.
He will be rolling in his grave.
