So I threw a pumpkin at her
Boy was he a good dog...
She made a right hash of it.
He was a real rapscallion.
Rapscallion!
A leek.
Come on ion
But that's really serious! Is he in hospital?
Yes, he's still a bit yellow, but he should be coming out in the spring.
I don't know what to do with it. I am going to cry.
That is so not appealing. I am left fuming. I may go into a vegetative state.
I like a little spring in my step.
In the archives
the first chef responds with “they can if they’re spring onions”
To be honest, I'm not shedding any tears over it.
It breaks out in chives
:D
Those damn rapscallions
...don't use shallot."
A piece of ass that will bring a tear to your eye
A dog with a bark worse than its bite.
Onion-haseyo
Read it and weep!
So I threw a coconut at him.
An O-pi-nion
A leek.
A rapscallion
Being tired and weary, the lawyer-onion isn't sure whether to go, but decides he needs cheering up.
So he dresses smartly, puts on his favorite aftershave and heads over to his friend's.
He gets to the party to find it quite a packed affair and heads over to the bar - fighting through crowds of reveller-onions - to get a drink.
As he gets to the bar, he notices in one corner a slightly out-of-place female onion.
She looks a bit sad and being the compassionate onion that he is, he heads over to talk to her.
This is quickly affirmed as a good move, as they hit it off immediately; she was abandoned by her friends shortly after arriving and had been minding her own business ever since, but over a night of drinks and talking, they quickly fall into an infatuation and soon end up spending an oniony night of passion together.
When they awake in the morning, they don't find it awkward and a steady relationship between the two is struck.
This lasts a good while, having its ups and downs like any college relationship, but eventually the day comes when they both graduate.
The two couldn't be happier!
They both get jobs close to one another and move into an apartment together.
One day, the partner-onion is anxiously awaiting the lawyer-onion at home.
She's been ill all day and checking has confirmed her suspicions.
She tearfully - and joyfully - breaks the news to the lawyer-onion; they're going to have a tiny baby-onion together.
A shallot, if you will.
A few days later, this prompts the lawyer-onion to propose to his heretofore girlfriend-onion.
They are soon wed, having a fantastic wedding-day and husband and wife-onions are on top of the world.
The day comes of the birth and no complications - a tiny, healthy baby onion is born to two proud parents.
Seeing this little bundle of oniony love in their arms causes them to fall deeper in love than ever.
Over the next few years, husband-and-wife-onions' lives are fantastic.
He's prospering at work, she's really enjoying taking some time to raise the baby-onion and over time the baby-onion grows into a hale and hearty toddler-onion, who then becomes a child-onion.
One day, the idyll of the onions' lives is shattered when tragedy strikes.
The lawyer-onion (now a partner-onion in a prestigious law firm due to chance and hard work) is at work, and mother-onion is washing dishes and watching her child play in the yard.
She glances away to take another plate and turns her vision back to
... keep reading on reddit ➡Opinion - 3.14 = Onion
Also goes by the name 'Rapscallion'.
Funions
"No thanks, I don't think the table's hungry."
Try not to get emotionally attached.
Once you start peeling off layers you realize they're all the same and it makes you cry.
So I threw a coconut at his face.
But when I opened the door it was just the chives talking.
The trick is not to form an emotional bond!
I started to cry because Onions was a good dog.
A Rapscallion
Onions was such a good dog
Most of the time, an onion with a tail on it. But every once in a while, you get a piece of ass that brings a tear to your eye.
Onions was a good dog.
A rapscallion.
