She's a mean girl.
They didn't like me critter sizing.
2 bald men fighting over a comb
It’s called the Redundant-Sea.
I'm sorry. I didn't know you had such a short temper.
Doctor: looking over the patients information Looks like you've gone from 5'10 to 5-
Patient: Starts screaming
The steaks were too high.
Then they literally 4'20"
...it speaks volumes.
They're on the same "I" level!
Plumbers are afraid of heights because they fear plunging to their death.
Son: I suffer from a fear of clowns
Mother: My fear is of dying
Dad: Italian gangsters-thats Mafia
Because it just go over their head...
That's a little gnome fact
So when she gets home from work, i’ve got her flowers, chocolates, wine and I’m going to run her a nice hot sink
It didn't help matters when I suggested he talk to a therapist about his low elf-esteem.
It's the ground I'm suspicious of.
I've had it up to here.
They're too high.
It's all well now.
"Sure, as long as you give me back"
......I wouldn't "higher" them......
A taller ant
Today I was talking to my dad about my height and he said "Well you do have quite big genes!" and I replied "I have to, otherwise my legs wouldn't fit."
From my head, tomatoes.
Credit to /u/drsuperwholock
I'm texting a friend and made a joke about his height which he responded with "that's a low blow". I wanted to make a snappy comeback with something along the lines of "I guess you could say it was a _________" but I'm drawing a blank. Maybe you can help out? :)
Wanted to give a big shout out today to...my legs!! Without you legs, I feel like I'd be at least two feet shorter.
Grandma: He's grown, hasn't he?
Dad (putting hand on top of my head): No, he still reaches to the bottom of my hand.
Me: "I sometimes look up at my school's ceiling and wonder how it gets dirty"
Dad: "I guess it's not their top priority...heh get it? Top!"
I told her, "I got you honey, I won't let you down".
My mom is not more than 5 foot, so we all tease her about being short. My daughter is now as tall as her, so in church my mom is introducing her granddaughter to some friends and says that she has to wear elevator shoes to stay taller than her. I chime in, "yes, sometimes her elevator doesn't go to the top floor." The couple lost it, my mom was stunned, my daughter laughing her head off.