I've started investing in stocks: beef, chicken and vegetable

One day, I hope to be a bouillonaire!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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Never make the word "Beef" your password

It's not stroganoff

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustAWimpoSimpo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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What do you call it when you have to quickly eat a beef dish wrapped in pastry crust?

A brief Wellington

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Giraffaery
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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Apparently, you can't use beef stew as a password...

I guess it's not stroganoff

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
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From my 8yr old: What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

You can roast beef, but you can’t pee soup!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Itsame_Daario
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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Squash the beef
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RFSDQ
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
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What beef only comes in 2, 3, 5, 7, or 11 ounce portions?

Prime Rib!

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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She handed me a jar and said, "This herb goes well with pork, beef, duck and chicken recipes, and fatty meats in particular."

I looked at the label and thought, "That is some sage advice."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DINC44
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef...

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pratojr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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Did you hear about the man who died while eating beef stew?

Police ruled it a stewicide.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OddLead
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
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Working on a cannabis based beef marinade.

The steaks have never been higher...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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My wife's an abysmal cook. She tried combining corned beef, onions and potatoes...

She made a right hash of it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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You should avoid beef when trying to lose weight

Too many cowlories.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shade168
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
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Apparently you can’t use β€œbeef stew” as a password.

It’s not stroganoff.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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Why don’t you eat raw beef?

So you don’t get cowmonella.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jonsalas
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anybody can roast beef!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MsSoperfec
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
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Still working on my beef and cream of mushroom cannon

Starting to worry it’s not stroganoff πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
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Do you know the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/magicmitchmtl
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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Why do people get nervous around stoned beef?

Because the steaks are high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlwaysPlaySupport
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
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How do you make your beef lean?

Cowisthenics!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VerbalAcrobatics
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
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You wanna have beef with me? Because this is how you get beef with me! I’m dead serious mate!

It’s been so long since I last got to see ya! You and ya family gotta come over for a barbecue this weekend!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WatashiStickKid
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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Dry beef has terrible hand writing.

It’s very jerky.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chappie167
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
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Big Beef Energy
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arutyh
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
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Mom moves expensive cuts of beef into the top shelf.

Dad: The steaks have never been higher.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2020
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I hope no one has a beef with this.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2020
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What's the difference between a good beef wellington and an asteroid?

One is meaty and the other is a little meteor!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/J0hn-c3na
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
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I have no beef with Hindus.

In the same way I have no pork with Jews or Muslims.

I'll get my goat.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
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Why do astronomers put beef in their shampoo?

For meatier showers

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Automated-Waffles
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2019
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I once dated a lady who had beef with me

it was a miss steak.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trinitati
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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Security professionals advise to never use β€˜beef stew’ as a password

It isn’t stroganoff

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mr-m-meeseeks
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between roast-beef and pea-soup?

Anyone can roast Beef.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/death-to-turtles
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
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I invested all of my money in cannabis infused beef. I know . . it’s a risky decision.

The steaks are high

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
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What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can learn to roast beef.

πŸ‘︎ 585
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EyeTack
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
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What do you call it when a group of giraffes have a beef kebob cook off?

A high steaks poker tournament

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeathMyMetal
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call frozen ground beef?

Ham-brrrrr-ger

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SeabaSquad
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2020
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"Ground Beef"
πŸ‘︎ 136
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MuddySkull
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Vegetarian beef
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πŸ‘€︎ u/damndomino
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
🚨︎ report
After the pilot had a sudden heart attack, an air traffic controller had to coach a passenger in landing a cargo jet full of various cuts of select Kobe beef

The steaks had never been higher

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πŸ‘€︎ u/linknt01
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
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Why is Beef a bad password

It’s not stroganoff

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RetireRateRat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2018
🚨︎ report
TIFU by ordering a Roast Beef instead of a Chicken Teriyaki sandwich.

Oops, wrong sub.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Allgen
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
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Dried grapes are the riskiest beef marinade.

But every once in a while you should be raisin the steaks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ghostedito
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
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If you're messing with Kobe Bryant.... Does that mean you've got some "kobe beef"

No offence to any fans...or followers.....it's in his tribute... I just wish someone else was on that chopper... Sorry if it offended you guys

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πŸ‘€︎ u/__black_star__
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
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You can roast beef,

But nobody can peanuts

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Escalade1414
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
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How do you know when the beef is smoking?

When the steaks are high!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RSGaming0416
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
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If two vegans are having an argument, is it still considered beef?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
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I’ve started investing in stocks: beef, chicken, and vegetable.

One day I hope to be a bouillonaire.

πŸ‘︎ 129
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Judge-Bredd
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Apparently you can't use beef stew as a password.

It's not stroganoff.

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Prpeach
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Do not use beef stew as a password

It is not stroganoff

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LucianoMercuri__
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2020
🚨︎ report

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