"Son, what're you drinking" "Soy milk"
"Hola milk, soy es tu padre!"
A kid is pouring himself some milk. His dad walks into the room and asked, "what kind of milk is that?" Kid says, "Soy milk". Dad replies with,
My son just threw a milk carton at me
A man assaulted me with milk, cream and butter !
Cashier at Publix asked if we wanted the milk in a bag...
I told her to please leave it in the jug.
My wife eye-rolled SO hard and then apologized to the cashier :D
The cashier was laughing though, so I'll take the win.
What do you call a farm when none of the cows give milk?
The missus asked me if I thought of other women so i threw a glass of milk at her.
That's the last time we are ever playing truth or dairy.
What kind of milk do you get from footless cows?
Our grocery delivery driver told us one of the milk cartons got damaged and leaked into the bag.
My 15yr old son picked up the first bag, which had a long vegetable sticking out and said "I've found the leek, dad."
Proud dad moment.
Cashier: would you like your milk in a bag?
Me: no, leave it in the jug.
What sort of bees make milk?
Why was the milk so relaxed?
It was chilling in the fridge.
I've just been attacked by the milkman. He threw milk at me.
What insects produce milk?
Some bloke just threw a glass of milk at me...
If I ever made an epic company for milk and cheese, I'd call it legend-dairy.
Did you hear the story about a glass of milk that saved the world once?
Why can’t the club footed nazi drink milk?
Because he lacks toes and tolerance
I se this one at least once a week. Do you want your milk in a bag?
Nope, just leave it in the jug.
I love almond milk.
It’s unlike any udder milk.
What do you call illegal, fermented milk?
What’s the hardest part about making skimmed milk?
Throwing the cows across a lake.
Milk has freedom of thought when angry.
They just want to get out of container when they're boiling.
What kind of bee makes milk?
Why do some Middle Easterners like sour milk?
Have you ever tried to milk a cow that has been cut in half?
Among the different forms of milk, my favourite is when it is churned.
What do you call a cow that cannot produce milk?
What type of Bees make Milk?
A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.
A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk.
The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"
He replied, "They had avocados."
What kind of bees makes milk?
Typing the word milk is alright.
That’s all I got and I did it in like four different posts.
I regret nothing.
I’ve got milk that has 100% calcium
My brother has me worried. Any time he drives by a milk farm, he pulls over and leaves a few dollars on the fence.
Doesn’t he know cow tipping is illegal?
What's the most difficult thing about producing skimmed milk?
Throwing the cow across a lake.
I have to go to the Dam Store again. Forgot the milk
Dad, is this your milk?
No sweety. It's cows milk.
So regular bees make honey, but what type of bees make milk?
"hey you forgot to get milk."
"Sorry I must've skimmed past it."
Once a man assaulted me with milk, butter, and cheese.
What do two people have when they both like to boil leaves in water, add milk, and put it into the freezer?
Was looking for some coconut milk, wasn't disappointed
When the first guy drank cow milk, society was probably like, "ughh, how dairy."
What happens if a cow drinks her own milk?
It comes in at one end, and out the udder
Milk is the fastest dairy product.
It’s pasteurized before you ever see it.
What kind of bees produce milk ?
Why was the milk scared for the cheese?
What do you calling it when your in milk up to you're eybrows
Pasteurize (past your eyes)
I waited over an hour for my cappuccino and when I got it there was too much milk and not enough coffee
Better latte than never I suppose
Why did Hitler only drink milk for breakfast?
Where does all Canadian milk come from?
what type of bees produce milk?
It sure would be weird if milk came from trees
I was at the museum and saw a painting of a bowl, with milk and some kind of food inside.
Milk is also the fastest liquid on earth;
It's pasteurized before you even see it.
Did you see that milk go flying past?
No? Oh. It must have gotten...pasturized!
Did you know electronics stores sell milk?
Mine says it's from Best By.
What kind of Bees produce milk instead of honey?
Wife: you forgot to get the evaporated milk. It was on the list.
######Me: [looking thru the grocery bags]
I definitely got it
Wife: don't you dare
Me: it must've evaporated
What kind of bees make milk ?
If a cow doesn’t produce milk, it’s both an udder failure, and a milk dud.
What kind of bees make milk?
What do call a racist man without feet fingers that is allergic to milk.
A programmer gets sent to the store by his wife. His wife says, “Get a gallon of milk, and if they have eggs, get a dozen.”
The programmer returns home with 12 gallons of milk and says, “They had eggs.”
edit: I know guys, I know, it’s supposed to be 13, I messed up the wording, please forgive me
What type of bee makes milk
Ok...Milk..Check. Eggs...Check...! Tomatoes...Check!
Sir, can you please stop writing checks for every single item?
This morning I saw the milkman drinking a sip of milk before leaving it in front of my door.
A man robbed me with milk and cream today.
What did the cheese say to the milk after he called the butter fat?
What happens when a cow drinks her own milk?
It goes in one end, and out the utter.
I prefer to have my milk churned.
What do you call milk that's too far away to see?
This year, instead of cookies and milk, leave Pierogi and vodka.
After all, Santa is North Polish.
The clerk at the grocery store asked if I wanted my milk in a bag.
I told him he could just leave it in the carton.
Man, Cashier, and 2 cartons of milk...
A man walks up to a cash register to pay and while his items are being scanned, the cashiers says if he wants the cartons of milk in a bag. The man replies with "No, leave the milk in the carton."
Dad: Does this milk taste funny.
Kid: sips milk yeah a little.
Dad: frowns Must be clowns milk.
I don’t like 2% milk.
It just doesn’t taste whole.
How do you name someone that help you milk the cows
I felt pretty sick after drinking milk with cream.
My stomach was churning for a while, but now I’m finally feeling butter.
What do you call a bee that produces milk
Why did the milk get a restraining order against the grocer?
It said he was a stocker.
My wife asked me if I ever had some Danish semisoft cow's milk cheese.
I told her Havarti tried it.
Did you know that milk is the fastest liquid on earth?
It’s pasteurized before you even see it.
Grocery store bagger asked me if I wanted the milk put in the bag or not
I told her no thanks please leave it in the carton
Which Bees Make Milk?
This one is from my son probably a repost
What kind of bees make milk instead of honey? 🐝🍯
The cashier asked if I wanted my milk in a bag
I told her to just leave it in the jug
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce milk?
What happens if a cow drinks her own milk?
It comes in at one end and out of the udder.