"Cow Pun - Are You Amoosed?" T-shirt redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/C…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Caught-in-a-storm
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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cow puns in the WCGW comment section
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HereIsNoukster
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
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Excellent cow puns
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JIM45954
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2019
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A few things my father taught me (Cow Puns) imgur.com/gallery/mEVb9K3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/conaer
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2013
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[Request] Needed: Cow Puns

So, I don't if this is the appropriate place for this, but I need a boat-load of cow puns for a D&D campaign. Any all and jokes are both welcomed and needed.

They can be as subtle or as obvious or as cringey as you'd like.

Examples:

A slingshot built from straps set up between the pair of Minotaur horns. A Bullista, if you will.

A character named Timothy Jacobs (Timoothy Jacowbs)

There is a ritual among Minotaur where they fight over the best food served. This is called a Cudstody battle.

Thank you for your help!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kunk180
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2015
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Who is a young cow's favorite author?

Moo Willems.

(By my four year old... She's really been milking the cow puns lately.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bondjimbond
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
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I told my daughter, "Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field." She said, "What's that got to do with anything?"

I said "That means it's pasture bedtime."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ArchipelagoMind
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
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I saw 2 cows staring at me from behind the bush.

I think it was a steak out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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What do you call a cow without legs?

Ground beef.

(My Dad was very excited to tell me this during our video chat tonight)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mgereau
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
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What do you call a cow that just gave birth?

De-calf-inated

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ncbenavi
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14
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Cows that travel alone?

Never herd of them!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TrueAidooo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10
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Saw some cows on the roof playing poker...

It was high steaks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EverythingAndNot
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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What do cows chew.......................................

MOOING GUM.................................................................. My 8 year old told me this and I'm curious as to how many up votes it gets, if you don't like it please down vote without any bad feelings .

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πŸ‘€︎ u/raulmonkey
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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I was thinking of making an investment on a new farming venture that feeds marijuana to cows instead of grass.

The steaks will be too high for sure.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Negative_Integer
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
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I saw a mountain with a lot of cows hanging out on it.

Must've been Mount Heiferest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iswitt
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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Holy Cow
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Doge_For_Bones
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10
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"Hey, look at that flock of cows!"

"Herd."

"What?"

"Herd of cows."

"Of course I've heard of cows, there's a flock of them right there!"

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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What type of magazines do cows read?

Cattlelogs

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 13
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Doesn't matter it won't come

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoMoreTerritory
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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Why do cows have hooves?

Because they lack toes :)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WeareStarstuff7
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12
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How do you know if a cow takes weed?

The steaks are too high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eissaphobia
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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1st cow: mooooo. 2nd cow: baaaaaa

1st cow: What do you mean, baaaaa? Don't you mean moooo?

2nd cow: I'm learning a foreign language.

(Once read that in some joke book)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jollyflyingcactus
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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Why do Cows wear the bells

Because their horns don't work. Β―_(ツ)_/Β―

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JNaik14
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
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Every day I have to take my cow through a vineyard…

I herd it through the grapevine.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/watercolorfiddle
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
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What do you get if you cross an angry sheep and a angry cow?

you get two animals in a baaaaaaaad moooooooood

Edit: Thank u for the gold, kind stranger

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dudesxx
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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Keep cows well hydrated

Otherwise, they turn into real jerkies.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wyllyam1111
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
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Why do pregnant cows have more energy?

Because they're calfinated

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quixotic_X
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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I was milking a cow and a fly flew in its ear.

I thought, that’s weird, I just kept milking. A while later, the same fly showed up in the milk bucket. I guess that’s what they say: in one ear, out the udder.

Edit: corrected an udder failure.

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2020
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If you tend sheep then you are a shepherd. If you tend cow then you are.....

The most important Dad at the annual neighborhood end of Summer barbeque bash!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MassGootz
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
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When a cow gives birth

Then it’s de-calf-inated.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BMWtheCreative
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09
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The farmer was very concerned when his cows got into his marijuana crop.

The steaks were high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12
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I told a joke to a cow.

He was very amoozed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StupidPockets
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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How do you count cows

A cowculator

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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What time is it when you see a cow laying in a field?

Pasture bedtime

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PrincessCuteButt
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
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When you see cows standing in a field, they are good cows.

They are outstanding in their field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Star_Dragon01
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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I said to my daughter, ”It’s time for bed, the cows are asleep in the field”. She asked ”what’s that got to do with anything’?

I said β€œIt’s pasture bedtime”.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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I told my daughter to go to bed because the cows are sleeping. She asked what’s that go to do with anything..

I said it’s because it’s pasture bedtime.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BigBadMerman
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
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A farmer was bringing his cows in from the fields ...

and he counted 396 of them.

But once he rounded them all up, he had 400.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SeattlePunk
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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What do you call it when all the cows the dairy farm go mad?

Udder Chaos

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jwaldrip
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11
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How do you turn a fox into a cow?

Get married.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DurgraxD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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It has been shown that cows raised in Mexico are statistically happier on average than cows raised in other countries

They've been reported as feeling "mooey bien"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AmazinBacon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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Two gambling cows ate some weed.

The steaks were high.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/daddyflextape
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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A cow ate a kitten.

She put the "cat" in cattle.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
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NASA is going to send the first cow into space

The stakes will be high

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πŸ‘€︎ u/robtk12
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14
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My wife said these cows are having a threesome. I said, "Wow! A moo-nage a trois!"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DaddyRecon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
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I NEED ORIGINAL COW PUNS can you suggest any please?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nicht-deutsch
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2018
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I said to my daughter "The cows are out sleeping in the field." She said "What's that got to do with anything? "

I said "It's pasture bedtime."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/timthedriller
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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