Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet.
Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
Whats similar in Everest and my wallet?
I always carry a picture of my wife and kids in my wallet.
Just to remind me why there's no money in there.
My wallet has been hanging by a thread for over a year
You loose ya phone and ya wallet but Alicia keys still there.
A man started beating me with a cup and stole my wallet.
I accidentally put my wallet in the freezer last night.
Was a good job really, I needed some cold hard cash!
What does a dumb empty wallet lack?
I got arrested for forgetting to take out my wallet before washing my pants.
I was charged with money laundering.
I had a joke about my wallet..
My uncle David just lost his wallet and phone and ID.
My wife was really pissed when I told her I spent $1,000 on a new wallet......
I told her not to worry I’ll definitely get my money out of it.
Did you hear about the piece of fruit that left its wallet at a George Michael concert in Zurich?
It was a Careless Swiss Pear.
Left my wallet with my horses.
So I can be financially stable
I drew £30 out of the ATM earlier. A couple of minutes later I heard the sound of 'Nessun Dorma' coming from my wallet.
"Must be those three tenners" I thought to myself
Robber: Give me your wallet!
Dad: Sure, it’s empty anyway!
Found a wallet in the street and asked myself what would Jesus do
After checking my wallet, I stood in front of the vending machine and confidently said to myself...
Where do cats keep their wallets?
Saw a jacket I really liked at the store, but forgot my wallet at home.
Why don't supermarkets have an aisle for wallets?
His wallet is gonna hurts
To the guy that found my empty wallet.
I don’t know how to repay you.
Kid knocked my wallet into the dishwater...
I put in the freezer so I'd have some cold hard cash
I just pinched this guy's wallet.
But it didn't seem in pain.
I lost my wallet couple days ago and had to go through security at work
The secuity woman asked "how do you spell your last name?"
So I replied Y-O-U-R-L-A-S-T-N-A-M-E.
She typed it into the system and was about to submit it when she noticed. She was so mad.
Did the laundry today and forgot my wallet in my pants pocket. Now im facing money laundering charges...
Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet.
Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
Just farted on my wallet.
Just farted on my wallet...
Just farted while sitting on my wallet
Finally got some gas money.
I always carry a picture of my wife and kids in my wallet.
I do it to remind myself why there is no money in there.
I just farted on my wallet....
Now i have some gas money.
I had to take my wallet out of my pants before washing them.
Money laundering is illegal.
I found a wallet in the street and asked myself what would jesus do
My wife was angry that I spent $500 on a wallet
Told her don’t worry, I’ll get my money out of it
If your wallet goes through the washing machine,
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