Last time I chnecked neck puns weren't a thing. Neckst time I hear a neck pun I will wrneck you with my bioneckology.
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︎ Nov 24 2018
Why did the wizardβs wife have hickeys on her neck?
Because he was a neck-romancer.
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︎ Oct 28 2020
Why do vampires bite people's necks to turn them undead?
Because they're neck romancers.
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︎ Feb 06 2021
My friend was worried about hitting all the bars on his guitar neck at his recital...
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︎ Jan 24 2021
What do you call a bunch of racist red necks storming the Capitol Building?
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︎ Jan 08 2021
This year, my friend decided to play his string instrument with a neck and a deep round back enclosing a hollow cavity, with a sound hole in the body at the voting booths...
He was arrested for ear poll-lute-tion.
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︎ Jan 24 2021
Last year wasn't much fun having a broken neck injury..
.. but at least now, I can look back and laugh.
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︎ Jan 05 2021
Did you know that newborns have weak necks and need to have their heads supported?
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︎ Dec 20 2020
I got into this huge fight with my chiropractor half way through my neck massage.
Now I have to keep looking over my shoulder.
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︎ Dec 05 2020
Neck pain
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︎ Aug 28 2020
It took me a long time to recover from my broken neck
but afterwards, I never looked back.
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︎ Nov 18 2020
A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.
I said to him is that a Fret!
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︎ Oct 13 2020
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
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︎ Oct 21 2020
Why is a giraffes neck so long?
Because its head is so far from its body...
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︎ Nov 25 2020
It wasnβt much fun when I broke my neck in an accident a few months ago.
But now I can look back and laugh.
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︎ Aug 24 2020
I cricked my neck a few weeks ago and itβs changed my life forever.
I havenβt looked back since
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︎ Sep 29 2020
I was going to get a face tattoo but decided to get a neck tattoo instead.
I guess Iβll have to work my way up to it.
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︎ Nov 07 2020
Why do giraffes have long necks?
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︎ Aug 07 2020
A drunk walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck.
The bartender says, "You can stay but don't try to start anything."
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︎ Oct 02 2020
Please vote here: When a prince ties fabric around his neck, is it a scarf, cravat or an ascot?
Voting has ended. It's a tie.
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︎ Jul 16 2020
I found out recently that itβs very common for Clowns to suffer from bad necks.
I guess itβs because they always sleep funny.
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︎ Aug 07 2020
My guitar neck got nervous
I said βdonβt fretβ
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︎ Jun 29 2020
My doctor bit my neck and tried to give me a hickey.
1 star review for Dr. Acula
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︎ Aug 24 2020
I had a neck brace fitted years ago...
And I've never looked back since
Edit: spelling
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︎ Jul 11 2020
My daughter turned 18 today, so I bought her a locket and put her picture in it. As I gently placed it around her neck, chocking back the tears, I said, "Well, sweetheart, I guess you really are..."
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︎ Oct 01 2019
I'm sticking my neck out on this one
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︎ Apr 17 2020
Someone wanted to fight about whether I was wearing a neck-tie or a cravat.
I donβt know who was right, either way my ascot kicked.
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︎ Jun 20 2020
What do you call a dinosaur with a cramped neck?
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︎ Jul 09 2020
I hate going to the doctor because all he does is suck blood from my neck.
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︎ Jul 10 2020
Where do you find the best neck accessories?
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︎ Jun 30 2020
Why they put a bell around a cow's neck?
Because its horn doesn't ring.
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︎ Apr 14 2020
Have you ever seen someone snap their own neck?
Itβs a real head turner.
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︎ May 22 2020
Wife said she gets turned on if I blow on her neck during sex.
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︎ Oct 20 2019
My wife said she'll divorce me if I keep making puns about birds with long necks.
That's swan way to go about it.
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︎ Nov 23 2019
Why is a giraffeβs neck so long?
Because itβs head is so far away from itβs body.
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︎ Oct 27 2020
Do you know why giraffes necks are so long?
Because their head is so far from their body
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︎ Sep 28 2020
Some guy just said he was going to attack me with the neck of a guitar.
I said, βIs that a fret?β
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︎ Sep 19 2020
Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?
Because its head is so far from its body.
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︎ Aug 10 2020
Last year it certainly wasn't much fun having a broken neck.
But now I can look back and laugh.
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︎ Jul 30 2020
Why is a giraffes neck so long?
because their head is really far away from their body
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︎ Sep 28 2020
It was no fun when I sprained my neck in a car accident a few months ago.
But now I can look back and laugh.
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︎ Sep 20 2020
Some guy just threatened to attack me with a neck of a guitar.
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︎ May 30 2020
Someone just told me they were going to smack me with the neck of their guitar.
I said, βis that a fret?β
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︎ Jan 09 2020
It wasnβt much fun when I broke my neck in an accident a few months ago.
But now I can look back and laugh.
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︎ Mar 31 2020
My daughter turned 18 today, so I bought her a locket and put her picture in it. As I gently placed it around her neck, chocking back the tears, I said, "Well, sweetheart, I guess you really are..."
π︎ 9k
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︎ Mar 13 2018
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