Do you know what the leading cause of dry skin is ?

Towels

πŸ‘︎ 193
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedMusical
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
🚨︎ report
Day three: what’s the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pizzatron574
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
My therapist said the best treatment for depression is to vigorously rub salt into my skin, to draw out excess moisture....

WOW....I'm cured.

πŸ‘︎ 116
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Moisturiser is good for your skin...

Let that sink in.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
The leading cause of dry skin

A towel.

Got em

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/karenismycat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I took my grandma to one of those fish spas where the fish eat all your dead skin.

So much cheaper than burying her in the cemetery.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I found the number one cause of dry skin!

Towels!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/runew0lf
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
🚨︎ report
How many skin divers does it take to circumcise a whale?

4

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife hates my collection of old snake skins.

So I have to keep them in the shed.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/weirdgroovynerd
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Can you give someone a skin graft from your butt?

Ass skin for a friend

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I could have sworn that my skin had changed color

But it was just a pigment of my imagination

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/skinhat
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is the skin of tree trunks called bark?

Because it's rough.

πŸ‘︎ 77
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wotmate
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the leading cause of dry skin ?

Towels

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I recently opened a building with an exhibition of dermatological skin cases.

It’s a real gallery of the fine warts.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/C0NSTABEL
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I had bunch of lumps on my skin

My friends started freaking out. They wouldn’t stop either. So I said β€œ I incyst you don’t abscess over this

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Haywired4
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried to substitute eggroll skins instead of the usual for my fried Chinese dumplings. They tasted the same, but came out rectangular.

I guess it's back to square won.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Who shows the most skin?

An elephant!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GlobalDesi17
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know what causes dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thewonkabro
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What's a word that gets under your skin?

Subcutaneous.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/amalgamxtc
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know you can hear blood flowing close to the skin?

You just have to listen varicosely.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OriginalCWP
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my dermatologist why my skin is so itchy a year ago, and he still hasn’t answered me.

I’m starting to think that he doesn’t want to make a rash decision.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lankyjay16
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
🚨︎ report
When I was a young boy, I was walking down a gravel road with my grandpa. I accidentally slipped and fell to the ground, cutting my knees. Grandpa gently bent down and began to clean the wound, removing the little pebbles now embedded in my skin as I cried...

I'd always heard adults talk about it, but I finally knew what they were talking about.

I'll never forget the pain of my first kid knee stones...

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What do matadors use to keep their skin moisturized after a bullfight?

Oil of OlΓ©

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/goat_chortle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I just published a book on how to prevent skin injuries and minor burns.

It’s non friction.

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what really gets under your skin?

Needles

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FaithInterlude
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an Irish Decepticon with a skin condition?

A leper-con!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cylasbreakdown
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Which is stretchier -- rubber or skin?

Skin, because Jesus tied his ass to a tree and walked to Jerusalem.

(A mom joke! By my 88-year-old church-going mother-in-law.)

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MintOtter
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My mate had an accident and lost his ear. The doctors were able to graft on a new one made of pig skin.

His hearing is now quite fine, but every now and then he gets some crackling.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife was telling me about a certain artist's skin care routine

Wife : Do you know (artist's name)? Her skin care routine has 38 steps.

Me : Well, it's not that far tbh.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clowninmyhead
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dwarf convict with a debilitating skin disease?

A lepercon

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2020
🚨︎ report
So I’m rolling through the supermarket and I see these Bare Skin condoms...

And all I can think is, β€œGod please let it be panda”.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brannono
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a skin doctor for silly dogs?

A Derpatologist

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Im_Destro
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I have the best skin care routine

It’s not good enough to bring you to tears, but it’ll certainly moisturize.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I beat my rivals by inventing the world's first book made from onion skin.

Read it and weep!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know what is the major reason of dry skin?

Towels.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I made the decision to not date the girl with skin lesions on her face too hastily...

The decision was rash.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I know a kid who was born without eyelids. His parents decided to have him circumcised and used his foreskin as a skin graft for his eyelids. The surgery went really well....

.... although afterwards he was a bit cockeyed.

πŸ‘︎ 103
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πŸ‘€︎ u/diceberg
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an elephant’s skin doctor?

A pachydermatologist

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GrandeThighs
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the number one cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fartingfajita
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I tried to get my wife to accept my apology after saying her skin was like leather

But she's not suede

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cinema_King
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘︎ 407
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the leading cause of dry skin?

A towel.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/full_of_fud
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ping_pong34
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yyz-ac
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2020
🚨︎ report
You know what really gets under my skin?

Needles

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dcouncil
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels.

πŸ‘︎ 75
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2019
🚨︎ report

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