I pulled a muscle digging for gold....
no worries though, it's just a miner injury.
My priest prescribed a circuit of crunches, flutter kicks, bicycles, and plank holds for the guilt I confessed about neglecting my stomach muscles during workouts.
I finally received my abs solution.
Why did the person with muscle pain put their doctor through a Soda Stream?
Because they needed to see a fizzier therapist.
What kind of a prize do you give someone who hasn't moved a muscle in a year?
I’m looking for some kind of outer covering for muscles and bones.
Not for me. A skin for a friend.
I pulled a muscle while trying to come up with some synonyms.
What do you win if you don't move a single muscle all week?
What the best way to make a muscle contract?
Make them sign on the dotted line.
Why I don't drive muscle cars?
Because I'm not shellfish.
Archaeologists found traces of Trinitrotoluene in a T-Rex skeleton. Scientists have since determined that T-Rex's muscles used the compound to function.
What's a circus performers favorite muscle?
What do you call a muscle-bound bee?
What do you call an Egyption's butt muscle?
What do you call A cop with A pulled muscle?
I wasn’t a big fan of having muscle when I started weightlifting
It’s growing on me though
What did the lips say to the facial muscle?
What’s the strongest muscle in your nose?
Do you know what makes me smile? Facial muscles
Doctor: “You’ve damaged several muscles including your calf and your quad.”
Patient: “Is that true, or are you just pulling my leg?”
What do you call a guy with big muscles and small brains?
I asked my personal trainer for another way to work my trapezius muscles besides doing pull downs...
He shrugged and walked away.
The Gluteus Maximus is the largest muscle of the body.
Native Australians were the first to develop the six pack muscle in their belly.
My doctor told me that I won an award for my rare muscle condition.
People get mad that I'm able to control my iris using nothing but extraocular muscles
By the way. I was hit with a huge piece of animal muscles from outer space yesterday. I used it to make steaks after.
I was hit by a meaty-ore.
My first car was a muscle car.
Every morning I had to push it to start.
So I was scrambling some eggs this morning and if you know me, I like my eggs real scrambled. So I was going at these eggs hard, using all of my muscle to whisk these bad boys, when suddenly my arm goes numb and I passed out.
I guess you could say I “over-eggxerted” myself.
After an intense session at the gym, I asked my personal trainer what was the best way to show off my new muscles.
He told me to hang upside down from a tree branch and curl my arms behind my back.
I said “weird flex but OK”
I told my dad that I pulled a muscle
He told me to push it back
I never understood why muscles get a trophy...
What did the joint say when asked if it'd be at the Muscle Party?
What do you call a line of Chevy muscle cars?
I pulled a muscle digging for gold.
It was just a miner injury.
I pulled a muscle swinging my pickaxe.
I pulled a muscle while digging up gold
I pulled a muscle while I was digging for gold.
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't moved a muscle in over a year?
What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't moved a muscle in over a year?
Do you know what really makes me laugh? Facial muscles.
What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn't moved a muscle in over a year?
Do you know what really makes me laugh? Facial muscles.
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