There a hair in my soup

Waiter: hi what can i get you? Dad: ill have the rabbit stew Waiter: only if you promise not to say"theres a hare in my soup" Dad: ill have the chicken then

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadow_gamer69420
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03
🚨︎ report
"I used to hate facial hair..."

"but then it grew on me."

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PersonWalker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Alternative Title: We're hair to talk reddit.com/user/redditads…
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Confused_Blue_Jay
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02
🚨︎ report
So hair we are
πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ha-Ka-Tu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I haven’t had a haircut in months, and I normally hate long hair, but I told my wife...

It’s growing on me.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DBones90
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
🚨︎ report
All the hair dressers all closed due to covid, so I start looking to the black market for a haircut

But I heard they were under cutting everyone

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/B0B0oo7
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15
🚨︎ report
How does a hairdresser stop themselves from cutting their own hair?

By sheer will.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it.

πŸ‘︎ 307
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/koukasen_np
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you get a hair cut?

No, I got them all cut

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NidalFlame
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
Why is Pavlov's hair so soft?

Because he conditions it.

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rhena_lahrie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I didn't think I would enjoy having longer hair.

But I gotta say it's growing on me.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/longconsilver13
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I've had a cheap hair transplant. It's made from cat hair.

Only trouble is, every time my wife strokes it, I stick my ass in the air.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend said she was gonna cut her hair in a mullet...

I hate mullets and I told her if she did I was gonna grow a rat-tail as payback

She said, β€œYou can’t!”

β€œI will!”

β€œBut that’s rat-tail-iation!”

PS: this actually happened and I’m in love with her

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jkustin
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me

What kind of drink can be bitter and sweet? Reali-tea.

Hehe

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thachickenchaser
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
🚨︎ report
A guy was storing all the facial hair since he was young and had created a huge pile.

When his wife told him to get rid of it, he said "no, it's a must stash".

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Schrodingers_liar
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Written on the side of a hearse in front of a hair salon...

Will Curl Up And Dye For You

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shdchko
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you heard of the hair stylist that refuses to cut hair?

If she won't cut hair to earn a living, she'll certainly dye.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jas280z
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
My brother who works in a tannery has gone missing. We haven't seen hair nor hide of him.
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
🚨︎ report
How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it.

I’ll take that ban now

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/archit14
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the lion get his hair cut on his way to the Chinese restaurant?

Because he wanted a Lo Mein

πŸ‘︎ 69
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Honestly? I hated body hair at first, but

It's growing on me

πŸ‘︎ 78
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I lost all my hair years ago, but I still carry a comb.

I cant part with it.

πŸ‘︎ 215
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
🚨︎ report
If your hair is long enough when shampooing...

Does Head & Shoulders then become Knees & Toes?

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NotA_Drug_Dealer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
A sales guy tried to sell me on a new preparation to wash my hair with, which supposedly contains the excrements of some very special rainforest animal or whatever.

I think it was Scampoo.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/deceze
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I never used to like facial hair

but then it grew on me

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheArizonaRanger1
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do bees have sticky hair?

Because they use a honeycomb.

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/onetwopi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is Pavlov’s hair so soft?

He conditions it.

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KaamosMajere
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you say when someone roasts a person with reddish-brown hair?

Auburn

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FlumeHound9
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad, did you get your hair cut?

No, I got them all cut!

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dudebrostien
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What does a bee use to brush it's hair ?

A Honeycomb.

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Where does The Joker get his hair done?

Arkham Hairstylum

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/joeChump
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I don't use shampoo when I wash my hair.

I'm a man - I use real poo.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
People who dye their hair red

Suffer from ginger dysphoria

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pepperoni_troll
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Art Garfunkel has been selling his hair, saying that its essence makes people horny

He calls it his afro-disiac

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BMACS001
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
If satan had ever lost his hair

There would be hell toupee

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kibydoge
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
My hair used to be black, and now every day more white hairs keeps moving in. This makes me angry, and it makes me sad.

My hair is getting gentrified, and soon, I won't be able to afford it.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PeeSeaBayBee
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did Kenny Rogers go to the hair salon?

He just dropped in to see what condition his conditioner was in.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
🚨︎ report
What helps a pirates hair grow?

Aaarrrgan oil

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Skrull_Symbiotes
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife claims that she can wax my chest hair without me feeling any pain at all.

I don’t think she’ll be able to pull it off.

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the name of the Grim Reapers hair salon?

Curl up and dye

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thelifesponge
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the electrician use to moisturise his hair?

Air conditioner

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PenguinFace6921
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you purchase a hair piece that you’re going to share with someone

Toupee

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/greatreference
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Why does James Bond Have grey hair?

Because there's no time to dye!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/19dazza97
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to hate facial hair

But then it grew on me

πŸ‘︎ 91
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I used to hate facial hair.

But then it grew on me.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NARCOTICS911
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
🚨︎ report
Did you get a hair cut?

No, I got them all cut.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vissik
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrA313
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
How does the moon cut its hair?

Eclipse it.

πŸ‘︎ 94
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jqzzy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it.

πŸ‘︎ 129
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Theoriginalclarky
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.