Did you guys know that Napoleon was super skinny?

That is why they call him napoleon boney parts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/osbomh48
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2021
🚨︎ report
My goldfish looked really skinny, so I added some steroids to the aquarium water.

Now things are Hunky Dory.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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What’s the difference between a candle and a skinny horseman?

One is a night light, and the other is a light knight.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Martholomeow
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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What are the chances of seeing a skinny man next to a catholic woman?

Slim to nun

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πŸ‘€︎ u/afc1224
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Don’t worry if you’re tall or skinny or rich or poor. And the end of the day...

It’s night.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RogueVogueDino
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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How do you call a skinny drug dealer?...

Slim shady

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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsyourboi103
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
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What’s it called when you sell your soul to the Devil to be skinny?

Fausting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-PeachesNGravy-
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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What do you call impressing a skinny man named "Terry"?

Flattery

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tarush_fx
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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As a chubby guy, I always avoid wearing skinny jeans.

I find it extremely difficult to pull it off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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My grandpa just came over to my house with a young guy wearing skinny jeans and eating avocado toast. Miffed, I questioned, β€œWho's this guy?” Gramps chuckled and replied, "Who, him?"

"This is my hip replacement!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2020
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10% of women think their ass is too skinny....20% of women think their ass is too fat...

...60% of say they don’t care, they love him, he is a good man. And they wouldn’t trade him for the world.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/brt_k
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
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What is the name of the skinny brother of green?

Light green

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mukundmadhav
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2020
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What do you call a skinny person waiting at a red light ?

light-wait (get it, like lightweight)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yungWilly2004
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2020
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My friend wanted me to go skinny dipping with her in the river the divides Paris. I told her to go without me..

She must be in-Seine!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
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I just watched a documentary on the evolution of skinny jeans.

I couldn’t get into it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
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Skinny jeans aren't for everyone...

I personally don't think I could pull them off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JadedByEntropy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the skeleton wear skinny jeans?

Because it’s got a marrow waistline.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
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What do you call a 100-year old who moons you when skinny-dipping every day?

An Oldie butt, bares repeating.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DavideoandPhoto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
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Yesterday I spotted a skinny guy at the gym

Always nice to help fellow gym goers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EWL98
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
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Husband and wife conversing about a skinny girl

Wife: She’s so beautiful look how skinny she is Husband: she’s so skinny she can hang glide with a Dorito Wife: WOW! That was original Husband: No honey, it was actually Cool Ranch

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πŸ‘€︎ u/randolph427
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was the skinny young man so postive?

HIV

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vagdryna
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a skinny axolotl

An axolittle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sweettapioca
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Does a skinny ballerina

wear a one one?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadeauxmarie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2019
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What do skinny jeans and cheap hotels have in common?

No Ballroom!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hammerlock01
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are skinny people so impatient?

Because they've lost a lot of wait.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRtHonLaqueesha
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the classic Greek Scholar say to the fat bloke trying on skinny jeans in his boutique?

Euripides, you pay!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/stevebox2345
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
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Here's the skinny

A friend asked "What does it mean if your palm itches?" I replied "I'm sorry I don't make rash decisions."

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MilPens
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2018
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I'm too skinny to be a personal trainer

So I gave my too weak notice

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mapguy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2017
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I used to be skinny and attractive...

But now I'm just fat and attractive.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mycareer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2017
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What do you call a skinny dinosaur?

Anatrexic

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bennygani
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2017
🚨︎ report
This morning, grandpa walked into my room with a young bearded guy wearing skinny jeans. I asked, β€œWho is this guy?”

Grandpa: My hip replacement.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2018
🚨︎ report
As a fat guy, I try to avoid wearing skinny jeans.

I find it very difficult to pull it off.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
🚨︎ report
As a chubby person, I always avoid wearing skinny jeans.

I find it very difficult to pull them off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a skinny man with sunglasses?

Slim Shady

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DinoCoat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2017
🚨︎ report

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