Chubby Puns

Heavy Infantry

I find it extremely difficult to pull it off.

All of his stories had Twist endings.

"this is the weigh."

A fourchin teller.

Siberian Huskies.

A soft server! 😂😂

Heck even skinny people don’t like ‘stares.’

Dad: "That isn't very nice but it's a reasonable fat simile."

They’ll be called Jafar and Wide.

When she can fit into your wife's clothes.

Sitting in the car at Sonic (an American drive-in restaurant)

Daughter: Wow, that's a pretty fat cheerleader

Dad: Maybe she's a cheergallon.

Because he was a meaty-urologist.

One is a busty crustacean and the other is a crusty bus station.

My boyfriend got me this morning.

He was making silly faces, squishing his chin into his neck to make a bunch of neckrolls. He looked at me and said, "You love my neckrolls, though, right?" I replied, "Ohh yeah, I do!"

Then he nailed me, "Guess that makes you a neck-roll-pheliac."

Never thought I'd hear that one...

Obese

The hippo gets out and the mouse says, "Fine, you can get back in!"

He shouts at the elephant, "Hey chubby! Get out the water!"

The elephant gets out and the mouse says, "Ok, you can get back in."

The mouse does this to a gorilla, giraffe and rhino as well.

Finally, the lion snaps and roars, "What's your problem mouse!?"

The mouse says, "I wanted to see which one of you stole my trunks!"

If you look under the word "chubby".

A mate is turning 18 and he was quite chubby untill about 14. I was hoping for a pun to go along with a picture of him at that age. Any sugestions thanks in advance

I was a bit chubby for a few of my formative years and my Dad used to tell me that I had "Bootydoo"

The first time he told me this: Dad: It looks to me like you've got a case of Bootydoo. Me: What's bootydoo? Dad: It's when your belly sticks out further than your booty-do. Me: Daaaaaaaad!

Paul has a shitty life, his wife constantly berates him, his job sucks, his boss is a bully, his car is a shitty 85 ford pinto with a cracked windshield and is in bad need of a new transmission and to top it all off he's chubby, balding, and he has a small penis.

The only thing good in Paul's life is his friend Artie. Artie isn't the brightest bulb in the world, but he's always been there for Paul in the tough times. On October 5, 1953 Artie stood up for Paul against his bully in 7th grade. Artie got his ass handed to him at that time, but so did Paul. That incident resulted in a life long friendship. Paul and Artie went to the same High School together. They traveled around Europe that one summer in college. Artie was Paul's best man at his wedding. Everyone thought speech Artie gave was terrible, But Paul loved it Artie was his best friend.

Artie's life wasn't much better either, he never had the smarts for that great Job. In fact he was stuck in a dead end job as a construction labourer. Artie's car was pretty shitty too. Artie never married, but he was happy in the knowledge that at least he didn't end up with Paul's shitty wife.

For Paul's 46th birthday Artie was pretty broke, so all he could get his friend was a single lottery ticket. Artie being the sentimental guy that he was picked the date of the start of their friendship, and their respective ages (46, 45). Paul loved the present, and thought that the two of them should go to the Legion that friday to split a round of beers and listen to them call out the numbers.

On Friday they are both sitting there at the Legion having a laugh over a couple of beers when the cute lottery girl comes on the t.v. to read out the numbers. Paul pulls out the ticket and spreads it out on the beer stained table in front of them. The lottery girl starts reading out the numbers, 45, 10, 05. Both of Paul and Artie's hearts start beating, thats 200$ already. 53, Holy crap thats like a 10, 000 ticket. They both start losing their shit. 46....... Paul feints. He just won the jackpot. 37million dollars.

Two minutes later Artie finally revives Paul. Paul and Artie celebrate the night away, buy round after round for the people at the Legion and get absolutely shittered. They close out the bar and as the ugly lights come on they stumble blitzed, singing, onto the street arm in arm with the winning lottery ticket in hand and start the long walk back to Paul's place.

Halfway home, Paul comes to two drunken

I find it very difficult to pull them off.