I thought "the streets are strangely desserted tonight."
But cheese and cake sound like an awful combo so I declare this my first cakeday instead
All that was left was the De Brie.
I think it's infected with Mall-ware
And said “Hey! Why don’t you Pecan someone your own size!”
All that was left was da brie.
Sounds good, but I think it might be a bit of a gamble
YOU JUST GOT MASCARPOWNED!!!
Every time we drive by the empty building my dad says "Man, that place looks desserted!"
How did chee feel about that?
It was a pretty ordinary day. A woman came in wanting a couple piece of cheesecake, and the baker was busy. So Pi cut her 3.14 slices...
Talking to her dad about pumpkin cheesecake cookies
Friend: "They are here for a limited time only." Her dad: "Well yeah of course once you eat them they are gone."
I cut my finger open and didn't notice it.
Dad: "Hey, you cut your finger pretty bad there."
Me: "I did? Didn't notice. I lost feeling in that one a few years ago when I cut it open at the base."
Dad: "I lost sensation in my thumb after I did the same thing, so I know the feeling... Or do I?"
Driving to the store.
Me: "The tires feel kind of flat. Should probably stop at a gas station and increase the pressure."
Dad: "We have to be careful, though. Too much pressure and they'll get nervous."
Going to the Cheesecake Factory.
Me: "We have to take the bridge, right?"
Dad: "Yeah, but we're gonna have to give it back afterwards."
Goddammit, dad.
Q: Do you know what you would have if every car in the u.s. was pink? A: A pink carnation
Q: What does a cat in the desert and Christmas have in common? A: SandyClaws
Q: What do a plum and an elephant have in common? A: They're both purple except for the elephant.
Q: Do you know how you get down from an elephant? A: You don't... You get down from a goose.
Q: How do you if an elephant has been hiding in your fridge? A: there are footprints in the cheesecake.
There were dozens more....
When accused of leaving the cheesecake out after having a slice, his response was, "I'm sorry, I was blinded by delight!"
I decided to make some dessert at home just because I can. To be more specific, I made a brownie cheesecake. Now, if you know cheesecake, it can take some time to make the components. The following exchange took place.
Dad: HEY LAWLZLAWLZ! Can we eat dessert yet?
Me: NO DAD. You know it takes time!
Dad: DID YOU FORGET TO BUY THYME?!
Me:
