WOOD yall give some wood puns
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︎ Nov 26 2019
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︎ Dec 24 2018
Wood puns
https://preview.redd.it/6egcw39r98z21.png?width=1626&format=png&auto=webp&s=07fa82d96e5340d3eed13d4c4832de6dffccd97b
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︎ May 19 2019
Punny Redditors, I need your best "wood" puns!
I need help for a project! What are your best puns that have anything to do with wood?
Examples:
"Can I axe you a question?"
"I wood stay longer, but I have to leaf now"
EDIT: another one: "birch please!"
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︎ Sep 24 2014
βHey, how much wood have you chopped so far?β
βNot sure. Let me check the logs.β
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︎ Jan 04 2021
I guess you could say it gave him some wood
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︎ Nov 20 2020
Tiger Woods and Cub Woods
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︎ Dec 21 2020
Wood fired Pizza
How is Pizza going to get a job now?!?
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︎ Dec 20 2020
A treeβs wood is 50% carbon, 42% oxygen, 6% hydrogen, 1% nitrogen
You can call it a chemis-tree
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︎ Dec 12 2020
My uncle just passed away from accidentally drinking wood varnish
It was a sad way to go, but a beautiful finish.
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︎ Nov 09 2020
There was a lumberjack who moonlighted as a serial killer. He used wood chippers to dispose of the bodies, which is why he was so prolific.
Every once in a while, these guys come out of the woodwork.
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︎ Jan 04 2021
I can cut a piece of wood in half with my eyes.
Itβs true I saw it with my own eyes.
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︎ Dec 02 2020
I was stacking wood and a piece fell and tried to hit me
He was all bark and no bite
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︎ Nov 28 2020
Every year around this time, my family and I go out to the woods to pick out and cut down our own menorah.
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︎ Dec 11 2020
What do you call an exotic Italian supercar made entirely of wood?
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︎ Dec 02 2020
I thought about dressing up as a plank of wood for halloween
I changed my mind because i would get board quickly.
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︎ Oct 23 2020
My neighbour asked me βHey, how much wood did you chop today?β
I said, βNot sure. Let me check the logs.β
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︎ Sep 26 2020
What do you call wood that's scared?
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︎ Nov 12 2020
Every time the camper heard something rustle in the woods he shouted, "It's a grizzly!"
Guess he was a bit bearanoid.
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︎ Dec 03 2020
I wood. Wood you?
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︎ Oct 26 2020
How much wood could a wood chuck chuck?
If a wood chuck could Chuck Norris
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︎ Oct 10 2020
My dad told me he met that famous actor on his walk in the woods.
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︎ Nov 18 2020
I can cut a piece of wood in half just by looking at it.
I know it's hard to believe, but I saw it with my own two eyes.
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︎ Mar 30 2020
What did Elijah Wood name his shop that sells only bells?
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︎ Nov 17 2020
What is Tiger Woodβs favorite place to go on vacation?
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︎ Nov 13 2020
A guy is walking through the woods one day when he comes across a suitcase. He takes a look inside, only to find a fox and her cubs. So he calls the ASPCA and tells the woman who answers what heβs found...
She says, βOh, thatβs horrible. Are they moving?β
The guy replies, βI donβt know, but that would explain the suitcase.β
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︎ Jun 30 2020
I cut my foot whilst chopping wood
It was an axeident waiting to happen
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︎ Sep 12 2020
Whatβs the scariest wood?
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︎ Sep 14 2020
Are pun requests allowed?
I'm trying to find a good pun for pine or pine tree that is wedding/marriage themed.
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︎ Jan 01 2021
I finally realized why trees donβt have teeth.
Turns out, theyβre all bark and no bite.
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︎ Sep 27 2020
A pillow made from wood
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︎ Jul 10 2020
Those parents must be nuts
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︎ Nov 25 2020
Walk in the woods
Two guys are walking through a forest when they come across a lamppost. The first guy turns to the second and says "Whats a lamppost doing out in the middle of knowhere" and the second replies. "That's Narnia business"
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︎ Sep 10 2020
If a woman has a baby on a piece of wood.
She would give birth on the labour board.
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︎ Oct 10 2020
A woodcutter once decided to build his own motor bike. He used wood for the frame, wood for the engine, wood for the brakes, and even a wooden gas tank.
Did he ride it? No. It wooden start
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︎ Aug 08 2020
Dad: I really donβt trust these trees
Son: Huh? What? Why?
Dad: They seem kindaβ¦. shady
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︎ Nov 12 2020
Jesus Christ would you look at the time
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︎ Sep 19 2020
How did the crazy people find their way out of the woods ?
They followed the psycho path
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︎ Aug 12 2020
I was able to salvage some sandpaper from my wood shop fire...
But it was in rough shape.
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︎ Sep 08 2020
What do you make a coffin with? Mourning wood.
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︎ Sep 14 2020
My father was a great wood worker,
until the termites really took their toll.
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︎ Sep 07 2020
What is Lil Jonβs favourite type of wood for bbq?
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︎ Sep 03 2020
"Hey!! How long have you been chopping wood for?"
"Not sure, let me check my logs."
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︎ Jan 03 2021
What do you call a sportscar carved out of italian wood?
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︎ Sep 30 2020
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