A furniture pun I put in the store I decorate.
A friend told me the local furniture store had some nice stools.
Upon closer inspection of their samples, I decided they were pieces of crap.
I heard Apple made a car out of furniture.
The salesman at the furniture store told me, “This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems.”
I said, “Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
As we drove past Ikea, my dad began one of his rants “Why do people want Swedish furniture? The fancy closet in my bedroom was built by a good ol’ fashioned local carpenter, none of this foreign import rubbish!” He was surprisingly vocal...
I love my furniture...
Me and my recliner go way back.
What could a furniture store call examples of seats for kitchen islands or bars?
Whenever I assemble my IKEA furniture I always seek the advice of a friend.
What's the most popular kind of furniture in Ireland?
The furniture store called me back yet again
all I wanted was that one night stand tho...
I stubbed my toe onto a piece of furniture.
How is a shoddy furniture manufacturer like a bag of prunes?
They both create loose stools.
The furniture store keeps calling me.
But I only wanted one nightstand
This furniture store won’t stop calling me...
I don’t know why. I said I only wanted one night stand.
I know a good joke about Ikea furniture
But I'm still putting it together
There's a group of guys that assemble wooden furniture for fun.
My great uncle died from drinking furniture polish
It was a slow death, but a beautiful finish.
What do you call a furniture store that isover 30 km away?
Do you know what someone says when they have no access to Swedish furniture stores?
Did you hear the was a fire at a used furniture store and two people died next door?
It was due the second hand smoke
My girlfriend said we needed to have a serious talk about my obsession with furniture
I said we could table it for now.
I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture...
But when I got home, the tables were turned...
Saw this at work today on a furniture piece
Do you think anyone will buy the new furniture made by Apple?
Man, I gotta say... I really love my furniture
Me and my recliner go way back
Why is IKEA the cheapest place to get furniture?
Because they have some Swede deals!
Which Country Music Singer's name do you say when you're moving furniture past someone?
My son walked into the living room only to find me looking around all misty eyed. Reluctantly, he asked, "What's up pop?" I blubbered, "My boy, I really love our furniture..."
"Me and my recliner go way back."
My uncle was a ventriloquist dummy. He died drinking furniture polish.
It was a slow death but a beautiful finish.
Heard this one on Whose Line last night. Credit to Ryan Stiles.
Every time I enter a room, I write down my name on a piece of paper and stick it behind some furniture.
That’s my signature move.
I hired a group of protestant religious sect members to haul my furniture to my new house...
They were movers and Shakers.
The salesman at the furniture store told me, “This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems.”
I said, “Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
The salesman at the furniture store told me, "This sofa will seat 5 people without any problem."
I said, "Where the fuck am I going to find 5 people without any problems?"
What could a furniture store call examples of seats for kitchen islands or bars?
I love my furniture...
Me and my recliner go way back.
A furniture store keeps calling me.
All i wanted was one night stand.
My uncle died due to drinking furniture polish...
...it was a slow death, but a beautiful finish
A furniture store keeps calling me..
All I wanted was one night stand.
My local furniture store keeps calling me but...
All I wanted was one night stand
A girl at the furniture store keeps calling me.
All I wanted was one night stand
I thought I won an argument with my wife on how to arrange the dining room furniture
But when I got home the tables were turned.
A furniture store keeps calling me...
All I wanted was one night stand.
A furniture store keeps calling me
All i wanted is a one night stand
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