Periodic Table Pun
Why is the element Sb poor?
Because it is antimony.
The pun is basically about an element in the periodic table which is called antimony and whose symbol is Sb this is basically playing with words that Sb is anti-money and that's why it is poor.
Variations can be Sb is anti-capitalist. But anyways.
A little periodic table pun
A little tip: When you’re out eating with friends and they ask if you want salt or not,all you gotta say is ‘Yea’ or ‘Na’.
How the tables have turned
So my daughter is clearing the table and holds her cup above her head and says "Dad look..."
"I'm breathing underwater."
I've never been prouder.
I don’t hate ALL of the periodic table.
Who was the hottest knight at the Round Table?
Had to replace all the bulbs in the side table lamps. Then I had to replace the ones in my ceiling fan.
That was the highlight of my day.
So one day, my wife asked me to clear the table...
I needed a running start, but I did it.
How come no one at the kings table laughed when he farted?
Because noble gases don't cause reaction
Is this on the table yet?
Some jerk just threw a container of omega 3 tables at me from a moving car.
I'm ok, the damage was super-fish-oil.
Mum: (yells at dad) - Why is there a bloody tennis racquet on the kitchen table??
Dad: Relax love it's serving lunch.
I was arrested for using cash that my friend gave me after I installed a new table top in his kitchen.
He gave me counter fit money.
(fairly certain this is original) I'm out to eat with my girl and the server tells us to scan the barcode on the table to see the menu.
After taking our order and asking if we want anything else, I point at my phone and ask if she can leave us a menu just in case.
I think I wrote my first dad joke original on something new to this changing world!
Which table fits in the fridge?
"Dad can you take your prosthetic off the table?"
"No, I'm trying to get a leg up."
(my actual amputee father)
Who was the spiciest Knight at the round table?
An italian is sitting at a restaurant table, with pizza on the other end.
"Pastapizza", he says to the waiter.
Why do Christians in Japan always put an extra cup at the table?
The chemist who created the periodic table was stumped during his process of developing the table. Suddenly, he realized:
He was missing a key element the whole time
The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
Who invented the round table?
I wanted to post something here for National Periodic Table Day...
But I'm out of my element.
I also enjoy eating lunch on a periodic table
I asked my family not to speak at the dinner table.
Who was the last Knight of the Round Table?
I found a "table tennis" shirt in germany
The biggest knight at King Arthur’s round table was...
Sir Cumference.
He got that way by eating too much pi.
I booked a table for Valentines night tonight and I just hope it goes better than last year.
We were there for about 20 minutes before my wife even potted a red.
Long time to make a table haha
I feel like I'm gonna choke a person one of these days by joking at the dinner table
And then get jailed for 12 months just for a man's laughter.
How the turn tables... (Son and I argument)
Me: Do you think the world just revolves around you?!
Son: Well I am a s(u)n...
Me: ...
Sun: ...
On Thanksgiving, why did the turkey cross the table?
To get to the other sides.
When is it acceptable to react to a table?
Oh how the tables have turned.
Page 44), “The Periodic Table”
I always eat my Kellogs at the poker table
Dad jokes at the dinner table
- Me: Decides to be adventurous at dinner, orders pasta with squid ink
- My dad: “My dinner is delicious, you should try some”
- Me: “Only if you try a bite of this pasta, it’s really good too”
- My dad, who rarely tells jokes, starts smiling: “So you’re suggesting a... squid pro quo?”
A king sat on his throne in his beautiful kingdom. Before him were three glasses set on a table. The first two are filled with water, but the third one is empty. What is the name of the king?
My favorite game at the dinner table
Waitress at Wimpy asked us if we'd like onion rings or mozzarella sticks 'for the table'
"No thanks, I don't think the table's hungry."
what type of tables can be found on farms?
Meanwhile, at our Christmas dinner table...
Me: "So I've decided to give up studying medicine to become a yoga instructor."
Mum: gets up, pushes her chair in and leaves the dinner table
Me: "Nah, ma! Stay!"
Looking at some fake fruit on the table, my dad said, “oh no!”
I walked in on a gathering of knights sitting at a round table and eating pie.
I found the Sir conference.
My wife told me to clear the table.
It took a running start but I did it.
Who invented King Arthur's round table?
There’s a room with two tables and ten people. One table has soup, and the other table has a punch bowl. All ten people are lined up at the soup table.
Now’s when you ask: where’s the punchline?
I backed out of a challenge I issued my friend to a game of pool on my incomplete table.
I realised I didn’t have the balls.
Who was the fattest knight at king Arthur's round table?
Sir cumference. He acquired his taste from eating too much pi.
I bought an accent table, but I can’t understand a word it is saying.
Accidentally used a dirty cloth to try and clean the table.
Who made King Arthur's round table?
What's the name of that plastic table in the middle of the pizza called?
Which knight made the Round Table?
My niece turned the tables on me this time
Niece: What is the favorite drink of a cow? Smoooothie.
I have never been so proud of my niece.
I hate using a desk & a table at the same time in school.
A man is at a job interview and the interviewer asks him “So why do you think you’d make a good waiter” and the man replied “Well, I think I could bring a lot to the table”
I tried to change the wood of my table but got yelled at
I was just trying to spruce things up
The waiter brought our food to the table. He placed my delicious-looking fajita plate in front of me and said, "Careful, this is gonna be hot"
Who created the round table?
Why was Han Solo crying at the dinner table?
Because the meat was Chewie.
Where do the knights of the round table have their annual gatherings?
A string walks into a bar with a few friends and orders a beer. The bartender says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve strings here." The string goes back to his table. He ties himself in a loop and messes up the top of his hair. He walks back up to the bar and orders a beer. The bartender squints at hi
What did the somatic cell say to its sister after it banged its toe against the table?
Someone cut a periodic table in half and the while neighborhood exploded
Shouldn’t have been splitting atoms
I’m tired of looking at this table.
I saw a table book about about anvils recently.
I just couldn't pick it up.
My wife bought me a two-legged table. I pretended to like it.
But the truth is, I can't stand it.
A vegan and a carnivore eat at the same table but don't argue.
Because they don't have beef for each other.
Credits: My 5 year old nephew.
That table was worth the pun
I bought a coffee table but I might send it back.
It doesn't taste anything like coffee.
I forgot that I had stashed a small rounded bread from dinner in my back pocket when I sat down at the roulette table... I immediately started winning!
So my GF and I were talking about the periodic table today:
Me: Do you know the symbol for Potassium?
GF: Let me think about it....
Me: K.
GF: No seriously don't tell me.
Me: K.
My son told a joke about Africa at the dinner table
Put together a table in my room for the kitchen, now the table doesn’t fit through the door...one could say the tables have been turned
If I’m at a rock concert and give the merch table a $100 bill, would the cashier be Breaking Benjamin?
Working the poker table at the casino with my new prosthetic hand is going to be a challenge,
But I’ll learn to deal with it.
I asked my dad if he knew what the symbol for Sodium was on the periodic table.
He said Na.
Can someone please tell me!!
Afoldable table
Me: oww this is a foldable table! It will be less of a hassle getting it to the camping and its on sale!!!
Friend: so overall a afoldable table!
Why do people in the Arctic build their own tables?
The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
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