I don't get why puns are considered dad jokes,

I've never seen a pun with kids before!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iiWizrius
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2019
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Pun the Unbelievers - Why Puns Are The Best betweenbornandburied.blog…
πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/meljennings
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2013
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Why is Dark spelled with a β€˜K’ and not a β€˜C’?

Because you can’t β€˜C’ in the dark

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/streety22
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2021
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Why doesn't james bond fart in bed?

Because it'll blow his cover

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/p_tally
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
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Why is it pronounced "Bri'ish" if you're from Britain?

Because they drank the 't'

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JenovasChild666
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella

Fo drizzle

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hobo_master3000
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2021
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Why shouldn't you put more than 239 beans in a soup?

Because adding just one more would make it too farty. Straight from my 7 year old daughter.

Edit: Thank you so much for the awards and upvotes. I showed my daughter how many people saw and appreciated her humor and she's extatic. I know she probably didn't come up with the joke herself but this was one of the first times she really got me with a good one and I thought I'd share it with some fellow dads and others.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oak05
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
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Why don't dinosaurs make good pets?

Because they're dead.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/scardeal
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2021
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Why are fish so easy to weigh

Because they come with there own scales

πŸ‘︎ 644
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Fox1984
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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I meant to cross post it but I don’t know why I cannot cross post so here is the screenshot version
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/idk2214
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
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Why is the letter A like a flower?

Because a β€œb” comes after it!

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/90eight
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
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Why can't blind people eat fish ?

Because it's seafood.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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My boss always laughed at my jokes at work but since the pandemic she never laughs at them in Zoom chats. I asked her why doesn't she laugh at them anymore.

She replied, "Because your jokes aren't remotely funny."

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAzrael2013
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2021
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Why did Karen press CTRL + ALT +DEL?

She wanted the task manager

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CyberSARL
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2021
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Why did Eminem prefer the Johnson & Johnson vaccine?

you only get one shot

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ways_and_means
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
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Why did Karl Marx write in all lowercase letters?

Because he hated capitalism

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jhench78
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
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I asked my Dad why he decided to buy a boat?

He said "There was a sail."

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_PoodlePants
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
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Why you should knock on fridge before opening it?

Because there could be a salad dressing.

πŸ‘︎ 529
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Enemy991
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
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Asked my contractor why he didn’t bill me for my new roof

He said β€œDon’t worry about it, it’s on the house!”

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JAK-the-YAK
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2021
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Friend of mine asked why I took a side job at the bakery

I told him I don’t knead the dough, but I do get a rise out of it

πŸ‘︎ 669
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πŸ‘€︎ u/troutslayer12
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
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Why is it a bad idea to iron a four leaf clover?

Because you shouldn't press your luck!

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GoodChadAndUgly
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2021
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My 6 year old told me this one today. Why do dogs carry bones in their mouths?

Because they don't have pockets.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kristhebrown
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
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Why don’t vampires play poker?

They are afraid of the stakes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kilographix
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
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Why did I stop and take a shot of vodka when I was running late to work?

That's what I do when I'm Russian

πŸ‘︎ 339
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rysefin
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
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Why is ballooning so expensive?

Inflation

πŸ‘︎ 108
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brittanycdx
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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Why is six afraid of seven?

7 was a well known 6 offender

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HisokaLaMagician
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
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Why are ducks so crazy?

Because they're addicted to quack!

πŸ‘︎ 304
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustAnAverageBrit
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
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Why are French snails faster than others?

L'ess cargo

πŸ‘︎ 67
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πŸ‘€︎ u/F_for_Respect_69
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
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Why do bees have sticky hair?

Because, they use honeycombs.

πŸ‘︎ 211
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rhshi14
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2021
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It used to be free to fill up your car tires with air, now it costs $1.25 You know why?

Inflation

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/snidawgg
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
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Why did the picture go to jail

Because it was framed

πŸ‘︎ 124
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Fox1984
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet

Cause they lactose

πŸ‘︎ 528
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Computercreeper3
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
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Why did the Mexican take anti anxiety medication

For Hispanic attacks

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joeytherealking
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2021
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Why can’t a nose be 12 inches?

Cuz then it would be a foot

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/makecents91
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
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Why did the blind man fall into the well?

Because he couldn't see that well

πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TotallyUnassuming
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2021
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Why don't cannibals ever cook noodles?

They prefer raw men.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jfshay
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
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Why do monkeys always share Amazon accounts?

Because they are Prime mates.

... Sorry.

πŸ‘︎ 48
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nediamara
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don’t work

πŸ‘︎ 155
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πŸ‘€︎ u/t_bone_stake
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
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My 11 y.o. son getting ready for school: Why do you always keep your snowman happy?

So he doesn't have a meltdown.

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πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Why were the cows always returning to the marijuana field?

It was the pot calling the cattle back.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DadJoker1988
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
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(My Grandma called me just to tell me this one): Why did the farmer bury a lightbulb?

He wanted to grow a power plant

πŸ‘︎ 246
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πŸ‘€︎ u/frozeneskimo02
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
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Why are communists always late?

They can only keep track of hours

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The-Memegeneer
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2021
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Why aren't koalas classified as bears?

Because they don't have the right koalafications!

πŸ‘︎ 172
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alpha_Supreme
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
🚨︎ report
Why is childbirth called delivery?

Shouldn't it be called take out?

πŸ‘︎ 189
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Why are shoulders your biggest supporters?

because they are always by your side

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Echo_The_God
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the non-binary prospectors head west?

Because there was gold in them/their hills

πŸ‘︎ 793
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thetophatjester
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Why searching for goose feathers is impossible?

Because you need to look up down

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Culnac
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
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Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?

Because it got stuck in a crack.

πŸ‘︎ 134
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πŸ‘€︎ u/A_C_Citizenz
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Why is yoda afraid of 7?

Because six, seven eight.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BrotherZ1ox
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the non-binary prospector head out West?

Because there was gold in them/their hills!

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cleverusername531
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
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