My wife said, “I don’t really understand the science behind human cloning.”
I said, “That makes two of us.”
When I was a kid, I wanted to play the guitar really badly.
And after years of hard work, practice and dedication, I can now play the guitar really badly.
My wife got really mad when I told her she had no sense of direction
She packed up her bags and right.
I had some really expensive pasta
But it was worth every penne
I tried to climb a really tall tower in France...
You do know that modern appliances are really spying on us, and sending back data on our habits. In fact..
Vacuum cleaners have been gathering dirt on us for years.
Wasn't really planning on laughing today, til I saw this!! xD
I was really embarrassed when my wife caught me playing with my son’s train set by myself. In a moment of panic, I threw a bedsheet over it.
I think I managed to cover my tracks.
I think joule really likes this joke
Anyone else notice that when you REALLY need an eye doctor they are hard to see?
I really wanted to become a monk.
But I never got the chants.
I don’t really like my new haircut
My wife mentioned that our baby chews everything. I told her that he's really going to cost us money.
He chews through paper, plastic and the other day he Bitcoins.
Sometimes Sundays are really sad, but I noticed today that they are never the saddest of the week
The day before is always a sadder day
Where do really small apples come from?
The black eyed peas can sing us a really good song...
but the chickpeas can only hummus one.
My friend really changed when she became a vegetarian...
It’s like I’d never met herbivore
My wife got really mad at me for stabbing a vampire to death today
I guess I was supposed to give them candy because it’s “Halloween”
I don’t really mind sitting on the left or right of a rowing boat.
I never thought the sun really goes around the earth
I came home really drunk last night and my wife wasn’t happy at all. “How much have you had to drink?” she asked sternly, staring at me. “Nothing” I slurred. “Look at me!” she shouted. “It’s either me or the pub, which one is it?”
I paused for a second while I thought and mumbled, “It’s you. I can tell by the voice.”
One of my friends was really in to fencing until his weapon broke
Apparently now it’s dull and pointless
Why don't any of my dad jokes get upvoted? I'm really upset!
Hi Really Upset, I'm Dad.
That girl with only fans used to be really hot
Until she got an air conditioner.
I hear she has really come out of her shell.
My family isn't really into pancakes.
We're more of a Waffle House.
I watched one of those really good black and white movies the other day
Interracial porn is great
I really like what mechanics wear...
What do you call a deer with really large eyes?
Doctor, Doctor, every time I take a picture of myself, the bottom of the picture is always foggy. It’s making me really fed up.
That’s because you have low selfie steam.
A really good nap is great for your health...
....and it also shortens your workday.
Were they really fighting?
Or were they just Joshing around?
My British friend was really proud of his heritage until he found out that his great grandfather was from Transylvania.
Now he can even look at himself in the mirror.
Street sweepers may seem slow, but they're actually really fast.
They're always going "broom, broom."
Sorry about quality just had to do this joke really quick, okey bye.
It’s really hard for me to say what my wife does for a living.
She sells sea shells on the sea shore.
My wife said, “You really have no sense of direction, do you?”
I said, “Where did that come from?”
Edit: Thanks for the love. I’m right speechless.
There was a guy who was really, really good at throwing things.
Im really Sorrey about this meme
Eating no meat except fish is really bothersome.
I should stop being a Pesky-tarian.
I really want to try Kool-Aid, but...
I can’t figure out how to get 2 quarts of water in that tiny little envelope.
I asked a conspiracy theorist if they knew who really won the election. They said…
I heard Bill Gates is really unsure if he'll ever find love again. But as the old saying goes...
there’s plenty more Phish in the (C:)
Man I used to really hate facial hair
But I have to admit, it's growing on me
I tried to climb a really tall tower in France
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