Waiting Line Puns

I thought, "This is a shit barber queue."

That’s the punch line.

A barberqueue

This joke actually has two answers: A Hairline or A Barbecue (barber-que)

BBQ

I was proud to immediately come up with "Hola Latte, soy Dad!"

Turns out he doesn't know the least bit Spanish and this was lost on him...

It is a long standing commitment.

A Barbie-queue

I was checking out a chequered Czech check-out chick who was checking out some chicken at the checkout.

Actually, he probably hates it slightly more.

I told him he had to wait his churn

It’s bar per queue

A few years back the wife and I were waiting in line for a ride at Disneyland, and we were stopped next to a cast member door. One cast member was leaving for their break and asked if they could cross, and we kindly backed up a little for her. As she opened the door another cast member was coming out, who also crossed in front of us. I immediately turned to my wife and exclaimed "We've been double crossed!"

I said, “ Dude, pho queue.”

I just kept losing my patience.

One's a curfew

The other's a fur queue

When the lady in front of me looks at me and says.

Lady: That beer look real heavy.

Me: Well ma'am, it says right here on the box that it's light beer.

I said, "Ha, looks like we're in BURGATORY, huh?"

Nobody laughed.

To which I replied, "No, I'm here for Beethoven. Who the heck is Will Call?" Worth it for the few 'extra air out of the nose' laughs I got from the three people around me.

Person B: Pho queue.

A bit of a reverse-dad joke, my brother and dad were talking about the actors in the movie. My dad was lamenting Megan Fox being April, and said "I don't see how anyone could like that lizard face of hers."

My brother shrugged and calmly responded, "It gives some guys a boners, others get e-reptile dysfunction."

The guy on line behind us started laughing uncontrollably.

Dad: We better turn off the fan, or we'll all get exhausted.

My wife starts getting her fabric cut and I tell her to watch out not to cut in line. I calmly say to her, "Everyone knows how these fabric people get. They would have us by the seam of our pants."

The best part: there is a lady who said, "do you have kids because that sounds like something a dad would say"

I was siting in the lobby waiting for a representative, periodically checking my phone and texting people back, when the grandfatherly man sitting next to me leans over and says

"I cant type on those things, I'm all thumbs"

Gave me a chuckle

That's the punch line.

That's the punch line

I guess you could call that a punch line

That's the punch line.

A barberqueue.

That's the punch line.

A BBQ 💈(barber queue)

A Barber Queue

A barber queue.

A barber queue!

Pho queue, I'm out.