My extremely low effort drawn out pun. What’s it trying to say?
Out-punned by an experienced dad
Cardboard cut out puns
Fathers day dinner tonight for my dad and my sister and family can't be there because of travel restrictions. I've organised life size cardboard cut outs of them and had my sister record a few dad jokes/puns. But I need help coming up with more ... the best, worst and cringiest are all welcome!
So far I have..
"I'm feeling a little flat"
"I'm board ... cardboard"
"You'd think my ears are painted on, You'll have to speak up"
"Can you believe someone told me I had the personality of cardboard"
Food truck rolling out puns
Why did the non-binary prospector head out West?
Because there was gold in them/their hills!
Went to GameStop to use the bathroom, but it was out of order...
I guess I have to keep holding it.
Within minutes, the detectives figured out what the murder weapon was.
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
If you have ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly
Because communication is key
Edit: it's from here, so please give the op credit
Today I found out that you can actually hear the blood flowing through your veins.
You just have to listen varicosely.
Two Deer walk out of a gay bar. One of them turns to the other and says
“I can’t believe I blew 40 bucks in there”
Chinese take out: 8 dollars. Tip: 2 dollars. Getting home to find out they forgot part of your order...
What do you call someone who points out the obvious?
Someone who points out the obvious.
Why was 4 afraid to ask out 5?
Because he was 2 squared.
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
I'm an atheist 11 months out of the year, but in December...
I was figuring out what career path I should take.
Geology rocks, geography is where it’s at. But ultimately, making mirrors is what I really see myself doing.
My printer was making music so I checked it out.
I tried dating a communist, but it didn’t work out.
There were too many red flags.
What do Mexicans eat when it's cold out?
I just found out that Einstein was a real person...
I always thought he was a theoretical physicist.
Easiest way to flush them out
I've offered my elderly neighbour $20 to try out her stair lift.
I think she's going to take me up on it.
I figured out why Teslas are so expensive.
It’s because they charge a lot.
A midget stumbles out of the bar...
The hardest part for someone when coming out
Saying it with a straight face
Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
Please don’t resort to violins and anger if you don’t notice.
Text message conversation with my dad the other day, where I out-dadded him.
Dad: Give me your best knock knock joke. Or jokes. Do it when you can no rush.
Me: Does it have to be a knock knock joke or can it be any joke?
Dad: Knock Knock.
Me: Who’s there?
2 snowmen out in a field, one turns to the other and says...
In the movie Inside Out, what is Joy’s blood type?
How can I get someone to hang out with me, laugh at each other’s jokes, and maybe share some fun platonic experiences together throughout our lives?
I made a belt out of watches
What's it called when Batman skips out on Church?
What's green, has 4 legs, and could kill you if it fell out of a tree?
These puns are getting out of Mein Kampfort zone
My roomba went out my front door and a pack of bears attacked it, an eagle carried it away to the ocean, and a shark finished it off.
Snowman family be chilling out here.
My Roomba accidentally went out the front door, and the neighborhood animals immediately started attacking it.
What do buffalo do when they run out of bread?
They go to the store to bison.
:D :D :D :D :D
My wife tested my knowledge of common household herbs, and I’m happy to say I got 4 out of 5 right.
What kind of horses only come out at night?
My girlfriend broke up with me when she walked in on me making out with my personal trainer
She said "This isn't working out."
I was at a hotel and asked the front desk to switch my pillow out with one filled with feathers...
My printer was making music so I checked it out
Turns out the paper was jamming
I figured out why teslas cost so much.
It’s because they charge a lot.
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the utilities closet?
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