Santa's wife, wearing a skimpy outfit : How do I look?
Trump spotted in France wearing a trashy outfit
Not sure how my wife views my hunter’s outfit.
Says she can’t see me in camouflage.
My wife is returning to the office and thus has to go back to wearing work outfits. One of her complaints was that wearing a bra was such a drag...
I’ve always found them to be very uplifting.
What’s the fanciest outfit a vegetable can wear ?
A buddy of mine has a new hobby where he dresses up salmon in tiny outfits and takes pictures of them.
He says its like shooting fish in apparel.
My kids were watching a show about identical twins re-united after being separated at birth, and in disbelief that they were wearing matching outfits when they met up.
I said, well, they do have the same genes.
A guy went to class on a test day dressed in a feline outfit; while his prof was blabbing about academic integrity the guy said ..
I'm not lion and won't be a cheetah
I have a lot of extravagant outfits and costumes.
The singer of "Believe" asked me to give her some.
I told her, "But I don't want to, Cher"
There's a new Thai restaurant that where the servers wear S&M outfits.
I asked the bank teller why the guy sitting at the next window was wearing a mask & a cowboy outfit?
She said he was the lone arranger.
I’m wearing the same outfit to work today as I did yesterday.
Yet none of my coworkers have noticed.
I went to a shop to buy a clown outfit.
I let the salesman pick my nose.
I went to dinner with a nun the other night and I asked why she had to wear her outfit everywhere
She said it’s an old habit
Why are nuns' outfits always ill-fitting?
Because good habits are hard to maintain and bad habits are hard to break.
The perfect outfit can make a good day great
https://i.redd.it/32qkvjdpobk21.jpg
What's the most expensive part of a pirates outfit?
What do you call an outfit you exercise in?
A sweat suit
(My mom told this to me not even 5 minutes ago; I think they're evolving)
Someone said my outfit was gay
I told them it came out of the closet this morning
This woman shouted at me because my fish outfit upset her child.
She got all up in my gill.
Why do golfers carry extra outfits?
For when they get a hole in one!
I saw a midget in a KKK outfit today
I think he is a little racist
How's a druggie like Mike Tyson in a maid's outfit?
They'll both clean up your meth.
I didn't have a brown belt to match my outfit today, so I made one out of cardboard, which subsequently ripped.
I just bought my wife a slinky outfit...
I can't wait to see her going down the stairs!
Went to hire a Halloween costume and asked what ghost outfits they had.
They said “ we don’t have any I’m afraid”.
I said “don’t be silly, it’s just a costume.”
Two teams fought in a small room using only their outfits and pocket change.
It was clothes-quarters combat.
"I finally found the perfect outfit to wear when I meet my daughter's first date" (x-post from r/pics)
People that hire a professional to help them with their Halloween outfit.....
....are Costumer's Customers....
I was going to buy a baby outfit for my future son or daughter...
But then I realized that would be a little pre-conceived.
When I can't find the outfit I want to wear...
If we're going out somewhere nice, and I decide to wear something different:
Me- I'm going to go change
Dad- Hopefully into a nice person
Har har dad. Har. Har.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
