Saw this tree at Materβs Jingle Jamboree and said to my kids βthis tree looks tired!β All the dads around me chuckled at least.
A bear broke into the bee hives at my sisterβs alma mater
And my dad had this to say about the event.
How would Mater from 'Cars' call his wife?
'Ma queen'
My 3 year old dad joked me
We were watching Cars 2. In this movie, there is a scene where one of the characters, 'Mater' (a happy go lucky 'southern' towtruck) eats a bunch of wasabi thinking it's pistachio icecream. My 3 year old turns to me and says " hehe, he ate spice-cream" then burst out laughing.
What do you call Bears without ears?
Doesn't mater what you call them, they won't hear you.
Job interview
Be sure to put in your resume that you used to voice act on Sesame street, that way no mater what you are applying for you were an ex Bert.
My Dad's favorite college football team.
Asked my Dad what his favorite college football team is besides his alma mater and my university.
Dad: "Georgia Tech of course." Me: "Why?" Dad: "They're the only football team named after an article of clothing..."
-_-
