My daughter was watching The Little Mermaid so I asked her if she knew why Sebastian was kicked out of college?
It's because all his grades where under da c
The College Board announced today that it will be dropping the essay section from the SAT.
It’ll now just be called the T.
In college, we had a buddy who always gave us suggestions as to what booze or drugs to try.
He was the original trip advisor.
In college, I used to live on a houseboat, and started dating the girl next door.
Eventually we drifted apart.
I called an old college classmate and asked what he was doing.
He replied that he was working on "Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminum and steel under a constrained environment."
I was impressed...Upon further inquiry, I learned that he was washing dishes, with hot water, under his wife’s supervision.
What is a Rubix Cube’s favorite part of college?
Why didn't the sun go to college?
It already has like a million degrees!
My kid would've been in college by now.
Thank you for getting me through college, student loan providers.
I don't think I can ever repay you.
I thanked my student loans for getting me through college.
I just don't know how I could ever repay them!
When I was in college, my roommate used to clean my room, and I used to clean his.
We were maid for each other.
My girlfriend in college was obsessed with trying to find the largest known prime number.
I wonder what she’s up to now.
I asked "should I go to college?"
They replied "of course you should"
I said "I degree"
My son is going to college in a town in Iowa...
He Ames to get a good education.
I can now legally tell dad jokes so heres my favorite. What did the father buffalo say to his kid when he left for college?
Why's it hard for Americans to go to Canadian colleges?
Because... you must graduate High School with all Eh's.
I went to college to become a meteorologist but I quit because
too much of the grade was based on class precipitation.
When I was in college, all the fraternities rejected me because I was circumcised.
You had to be a complete dick.
When my kid graduates high school I want him to go to Indiana for college.
Then I can have a “Hoosier Daddy” bumper sticker.
I have two college friends who studied ancient Egyptian plumbing.
They were pharaoh faucet majors.
What do you call scientific equipment that went to college?
I wrote a card for my friend who just graduated high school and wants to study geology and/or paleontology in college. She also likes puns :)
Where did Jesus go to college?
I couldn’t afford to pay my electric bill in college
Those were pretty dark times
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
When I was a single man in college, I had a lot of free time.
Then I started listening to full albums, and hardly ever left my room.
I went to this restaurant called Warren one time in college
It really was a terrible buffet
When I was in college, my roommate and I would clean each other's rooms
We were maid for each other
I recently failed my Medical College entrance exam because of nerves.
The correct answer was blood vessels.
While taking a tour of a college campus, the tour guide mentioned that the school was surrounded by three different cemeteries.
Tour guide: And did you know that if you live across from a cemetery, you can’t be buried there?
Me: What?? Why not?
Tour guide: Because you’re still alive!
The archaeologist had majored in geology in college,
but he was also a history miner.
What do you study in music college?
My son wanted to join a really expensive math college but he didn't have enough money...
I needed to cosine for him.
How many college students does it take to change a lightbulb.
None, they can't afford the lightbulb.
College offers some questionable class choices, but o you know which one is the most sketchy?
Art class: Pencil Drawing 101
After going back to college to get yet another degree, some of my friends made fun of me for it.
They were some real 3rd degree burns.
Not many people know about this, but when I was in college, I majored in surfing.
They called me a “rad” student.
What do bees go to college for?
Did you hear about the highway being built by the college in New Orleans?
What did the buffalo dad say to his son when he moved out for college?
In college, I used to live on a houseboat, and started seeing the girl next door.
Eventually we drifted apart.
What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?
When I was in college my roommate used to clean my room and I used to clean his
We were maid for each other
When I was in college, my roommate used to clean my room, and I used to clean his.
We were maid for each other.
Why did the sun never go to college?
It already has thousands of degrees.
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