I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage

I lost my case.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Merlin-5
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
🚨︎ report
I wrote an essay in highschool about lottery winners who ended up losing. Apparently I thought this was way funnier than it is.
πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RealSkylitPanda
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the bullet end up losing his job?

He got fired.

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
🚨︎ report
The tree hated losing his foliage in September.

When it grew back in March, he was so relieved.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EastlyGod1
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Losing 20Β£ is easy if you know what you're doing.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Coyote_Crate
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
🚨︎ report
I really ought to start losing weight...

But, I've got too much on my plate at the moment.

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
The lawyer always kept losing his cases

He didn't mind cause he was practicing

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I considered converting my wardrobe to house my board game collection, but was worried about losing clothing space.

It was trivial per suit.

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PythagorasJones
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Losing weight is a piece of cake

See, it's a simple process... just don't pick it up!

Happy cake day to anyone who shares the same as mine!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bugtrial
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
There was an old man who lived by a forest. As he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting...

He said, "Look at my hair. It used to be so magnificent, but it's completely gone now. My hair can't be saved. But look outside at the forest. It's such a lovely forest with so many trees, but sooner or later they'll all be cut down and this forest will look as bald as my hair."

"What I want you to do..." the man continued. "Is, every time a tree is cut down or dies, plant a new one in my memory. Tell your descendants to do the same. It shall be our family's duty to keep this forest strong."

So they did.

Each time the forest lost a tree, the children replanted one, and so did their children, and their children after them.

And for centuries, the forest remained as lush and pretty as it once was, all because of one man and his re-seeding heirline.

πŸ‘︎ 21k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad Flights Inc. is losing business

Some would say it’s a receding airline...

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RosselWestbrook
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend gave me a losing lottery ticket

It didn’t make any cents

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/watchoutlca
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm going to have to fire my mechanic. He's always losing track of time.

And "Temporal Mechanics" is a dumb name for a company anyway.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toadfinger
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
There was an old man who lived by a forest. As he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting /r/Jokes/comments/iya4l4/…
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ProCreeper_2000
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I was racing with my younger brother on the track, and then he got mad that I didn’t draw a finish line marker on the sand. We kept racing but he kept losing, and at one point he got so mad he threw a tantrum and started hitting and punching and kicking me furiously

.....and that’s when I drew the line.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/singh_j
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
What does your monitor tell you when you punch it for losing a game?

That hertz!

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/M1shuTheOne
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when you speak two languages and start losing vocabulary in both of them?

Byelingual

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paoerfuuul
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
🚨︎ report
To the person losing all their forks:

It must be terrible to be running out of tines.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GeraldAlabaster
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the atom say when it kept losing electrons?

I really need to keep an ion them.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife hates losing

In the bed, she always says, "Do you ALWAYS have to come first?!"

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gr8prajwalb
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
"A truck loaded with thousands of copies of Roget's Thesaurus crashed yesterday losing its entire load.

Witnesses were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupefied, confused, shocked, rattled, paralysed, dazed, bewildered, mixed up, surprised, awed, dumbfounded, nonplussed, flabbergasted, astounded, amazed, confounded, astonished, overwhelmed, horrified, numbed, speechless, and perplexed.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/always-paranoid
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do seas hate losing?

It makes them salty.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rootlariviere
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2020
🚨︎ report
So I tried losing weight by not eating anything at all

But when morning came I had to break fast

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the02guy
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm flying to Oslo tomorrow to receive an award for losing so much weight.

I've won a Nobellly Prize.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlRedux
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
🚨︎ report
2 years ago, the doctor told me I was losing my hearing.

Haven't heard from him since then.

πŸ‘︎ 438
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToeKneeh
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when you finally come to terms with losing all your toes?

You become lack toes and tolerant.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Holeeschite
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the man say after losing his left eye?

β€œI can see all right”

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/0zzyking
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Losing weight in Great Britain is easy.

Everything costs a couple pounds

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/13toycar
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What does Batman do when he's losing at poker ?

He uses his Joker

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/belgium-noah
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
He's totally losing his mind...
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/randomOmellette
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the fish accept its death after losing its respiratory organs?

Because it lost the gill to live.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Losing my religion
πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sheineken
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife was having a stressful day at work and just sent me a text "I'm losing my mind!"

I texted back "it's all in your head".

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TimothyLux
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Slowly losing control
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zdenkacardas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
🚨︎ report
A man who took a airline to court for losing his luggage...

...has lost his case.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2021
🚨︎ report
A man sued an airline after losing his luggage

Let's just say he lost his case

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/X_Tbull
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
My doctor told me that I am losing my hearing

I haven't heard from him since

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
🚨︎ report
When you speak two languages and start losing vocabulary in both of them: BYELINGUAL.
πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eeyoretracy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage

I lost the case

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/x_amxxn_x
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
BREAKING NEWS: A man who took an airline company to court for losing his luggage has lost his case.
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mykeuk
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
🚨︎ report
I sued an airline for losing my luggage

I lost my case.

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lunarsee
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report

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