Yes don't forget to take it.
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/whiskey_risky
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
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I once asked Tom Jones if he ever forgets the lyrics....

He said, it’s not unusual.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Flippmo
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2021
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I'll never forget my grandfather's last words before he kicked the bucket

"Do you wanna see how far I can kick that bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 216
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CurtCocane
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
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Why did the banana forget to take out the garbage?

It slipped his mind.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jokesonyoumate1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2021
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I'll never forget my grandfathers last words to me..

"Would you stop shaking the fucking ladder?!"

πŸ‘︎ 181
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πŸ‘€︎ u/facts_my_guyy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
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I'll never forget the day I got married....

I've tried everything.....Alcohol. Drugs, even Hypnosis.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
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I remember when I left home for the first time, my mum said to me, "Don't forget to write!"

I thought to myself, 'That's unlikely,Its a basic skill, why should I?"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
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DOES ANYONE ELSE FORGET THE ABBREVIATION FOR MAINE?

OR IS IT JUST ME?

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/suktupbutterkup
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
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When I left home to go on a business trip, my wife said "Don't forget to write"

I thought, "That's unlikely... it's a basic skill, isn't it?"

πŸ‘︎ 388
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EmBeeCSGO
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Only two things make me forget about all the shit that's going on with my life. Comedy and......

Alzheimer's

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aritra_001
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Don’t forget to dress warm tomorrow

It’s going to be minus 45.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
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I’ll never forget the day I saw the ugliest man I’ve ever seen.

The dude thought it was funny to copy my every move, he’s lucky there was a pane of glass between us.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yellgames01
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
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Don't forget you
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetropolisCourier
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Was checking my son's essay about the countryside and saw he kept writing the word 'hll'. So I told him to never forget...

The hills have 'i's.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2021
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I forget things once in awhile.

I have Someteimer’s.

(Courtesy of my mom).

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anddditburns
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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Don’t forget to tip the waitress
πŸ‘︎ 124
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DesDesign11
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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I'll never forget the day I first met my wife. We were at a fancy dress party and she was stood there, looking gorgeous and slim, with her fat mate...

They'd gone together dressed as the number 10...

I knew there and then that she was the One!!

πŸ‘︎ 74
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do beginner artist always forget to draw the stick figure’s thumb when they draw a fist?

They forgot the punchline

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SleepyCrow07
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I had a joke about a grizzly in my car but i always forget the punch line ..

Bear with me.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/azzapro
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
A painter forgets to paint the trim a different color.

The home owner comes out and says β€œThat’s all white.”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Karrathan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Don't forget your protective eyewear
πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lord_and_Savion
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2020
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I’ll never forget the last thing my late grandfather said to me.

Sorry I’m late.

πŸ‘︎ 176
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Light_bulbnz
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
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Why did the limping Donkey cross the road ?...Ahh forget it.

.. Sorry for such a lame Ass joke.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
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Why can't an elephant forget?

He has a trunk full of memories.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rick--Diculous
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
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This might be hard to get, but a Man walks into a tavern and..ahh forget it.

Too much of an Inn joke.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
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Who does a Muslim ask when he forgets about the greatest Mughal Emperor?

#Allah-Who-Akbar

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/siddharths067
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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Dad: Hey, don’t forgetβ€” tomorrow is Father’s Day.

Me: Don’t forget its son day too.

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
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What is that 1 memory that the computer will never forget?

His school EEPROM.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/XXXTYLING
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget when my dad told me, "Find yourself a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you!” A little taken aback, I asked him what he meant. He explained...

β€œShe knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them!"

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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Don’t forget to tip your server
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PanchofromAZ
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife said, β€œWhy did you forget to get all the stuff from the grocery store that I wrote down?”

I said, β€œWhen I got there, I felt.....listless.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
When God integrated Planet Earth, he didn’t forget his integral calculus lesson.

He remembered to add the sea.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
🚨︎ report
When I reach home, my 1.5 y.o. son rushes out to the gate to sit in my lap while I park the car. Then he just grabs the steering and starts shaking it with brrrmmm brrrmmm sound. His cute antics always make me forget that he's suffering from a rare disease.

It's called Parking Son's disease.

Edit: Thanks for the gold, kind stranger.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/unlucky_genius
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2018
🚨︎ report
I’ll never forget my 6th, 13th, 18th, 21st, 23rd, and 27th birthdays, they were great

Some of them were even prime!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mustacius
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad said to me "Do you ever go into a room and forget what you went in there for?"

Great dad, undistinguished fireman.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I hate it when I forget to turn off the toaster

I guess you can say I'm black toast intolerant

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jagerjj
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when you forget where you put the bacon?

Hamnesia

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Edgar-Allan-Post
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when the teacher forgets the magnets for science lab?

Ferrous metal's day off

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Preceptual
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget my dad's last words...

Are you sure it's loaded with blanks?

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Don’t forget to dress warm tomorrow

I heard it’s going to be minus 45

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/roshiqx
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2021
🚨︎ report
When I was leaving home for the first time, my dad said to me, "Don't forget to write."

I thought, "That's unlikely. It's a basic skill, isn't it ?"

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget my old man's last words before he kicked the bucket:

"Son, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 95
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DevonWhiteTurnUp
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I will never forget the last thing what my late grandfather told me.

Sorry I'm late.

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/__teju
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket.

"Watch how far I can kick this bucket!!!:

πŸ‘︎ 69
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πŸ‘€︎ u/flannel-ish
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I'll never forget the last thing my dad said to me before he kicked the bucket.......

He said: "Son, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrBlue08
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I told my dad, β€œDon’t forget tomorrow is Mother’s Day!”

Dad : Don’t forget it’s son day too.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I’ll never forget my dads last words before he kicked the bucket. He looked me in the eyes and said

β€œSon”... β€œhow far do you think I can kick this bucket?”

πŸ‘︎ 73
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
🚨︎ report

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