Just don't drop the remote
πŸ‘︎ 105
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πŸ‘€︎ u/u_Adi
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19
🚨︎ report
A friend told me that the ball drop was a minute late

The ball was dropped at the ball drop.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fleeves
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
🚨︎ report
My friend told me, "Did you know trees drop edible stuff, that aren't fruit?"

"That's nuts." I replied.

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27
🚨︎ report
Three boys go into a haunted house. One brought a knife, one brought a gun and one brought some cough drops

They crept in. It was pitch black and stone quiet. They were suddenly starting to regret this dare. Stupidly, only one brought a flash light. The aggressive darkness and inky black yielded with grudging compliance but always seeming to push back. They moved cautiously onward amid the dust and cobwebs. The floor creaked. They breathed in tight, quick breaths. You could hear a pin drop.

Suddenly, there was a deep moan. "OOOOOOOOUUUUU". It seemed from below them. The house had been abandoned for years. Who or what could make such a sound? The boys looked at each other, but continued on, hearts pounding in their chests.

As they proceeded into the kitchen they encountered a swarm of flies. Buzzing and beating their necks and faces, they rushed and stumbled to the door, not stopping to see what they were truly feasting on. They slammed the door behind them. Maybe a body? But no way were they going back to find out. And again came the sound, "ooooOOOOOooooOOUUU" but louder this time, and closer.

They proceeded through the dark into the dining room. They saw a fully set dining table covered in cob webs. Dust-covered regal-looking glasses, goblets and silverware adorned the table. Spiders climbed on ivory plates. Clearly a house of privilege and set for a grand feast which never happened.

Or, perhaps, met a fatal end?

They pushed on. But again that unearthly howl.

"oooooOOOOOOOOOOOUuuuuUUUUuuUUOOOOooo".

They found the basement staircase, and from below, the sounds seemed to be emanating. Could they proceed? Would they? Did they dare? Two of the boys looked at each other, faces filled with worry.

But the third said, confidently, "We're going down there." Not wanting to seem the weaker, the other two boys steeled themselves and nodded.

The stairs creaked and groaned evily under their feet. The rickety banister shook in angry defiance. Insects and vermin scattered underneath them with every step. They were descending into hell, they knew, but none would turn back.

And the sound: "oOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUuuuuUUOOOO". Now loud enough to fill not only their heads but seeming to claw at their very souls!

Now at the basement door! The antique, crying squeak of the hinges eeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEee made the boys wince and almost cover their ears. But they had to know. WHAT is making that horrible, terrible sound?

"ooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUoooooUUUUUUUOOOOOOO"

In the center of the basement lay an unholy coffin! A twisted artistic expression of murder, decay and

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 12k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/billbixbyakahulk
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?

A flat major

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DantheMan350V2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01
🚨︎ report
Why did a pirate drop out of school early?

he had seven c's

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/artfillin
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Donald Trump should drop the ball in Times Square on New Years Eve

He certainly has plenty of experience

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DigThisMyBrother
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
🚨︎ report
I just saw my wife trip over and drop a basket of clothes she just ironed.

I watched it all unfold.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Meetball with the mic drop!
πŸ‘︎ 166
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RajuNeupane
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report
If you accidentally drop ice cubes on the floor, just gently kick them under the refrigerator.

Soon It’ll just be water under the fridge.

πŸ‘︎ 446
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAvacadoBandit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I got to drop this bomb yesterday at Thanksgiving

Grandma: So what did you do to your turkey? Was it mexican? My Mom: No we tried a cajun sauce this time Grandma: What makes it Cajun? Me: It’s Thanksgiving so its a special oh-cajun

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/waltregus12
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you tell the sex of an ant? You drop it in water. It sinks: girl ant. It floats:...

Boy ant

πŸ‘︎ 507
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πŸ‘€︎ u/plap12
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
DROP YOUR BEST PUNS FOR HISTORY DRINKING GAME

I'm creating a drinking game where every important event equals to drinking, but I am nowhere close to NAMING my drinking game. A friend of mine recommended this subreddit, saying that people drop some really punny puns here. Give your ideas for a title, I think up to 6 words would be okay.

Let's see what you can do!

What you need to know about the game:

  • You can create your timeline based on packages (ages, countries, continents, etc).
  • Every important event has a normal action and drinking action.
  • You never know in which year you are located but get an estimate year. You can either guess the year (or date) and get a free pass or you have to execute the action or drinking action. When you guess wrong, you'll have to double it.

That's basically it.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tyounr
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad: Son, have you seen my eye drops?

Son: Oh. Looks like I dropped them

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LikeTheHurricane
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I was asked if I wanted to review my new drop saw.

Mitres well

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NZn3rd
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
If you were to accidentally drop your waffle at the beach, it would most likely happen in...

...San Diego.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThroneDiscs
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
10 years ago I promised to myself not to touch a drop of drink while I'm at work.

I haven't touched a job since.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What is it called when you drop your snack

A snackcident

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnaK_HadiOS
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
LPT: If you accidentally drop ice cubes on the floor, gently slide them under your refrigerator.

Soon, it’ll be water under the fridge.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
🚨︎ report
School Drop off Conversation

A Conversation I had with my Daughter when I dropped her off at school

Me: Hey so you know how your cats are always running around all over the place right?
Daughter: Yeah why?
Me: So When they stop moving are they on Paws?
Daughter: Face Palms and says "OKAY DAD BYEEE!!!"
Me: YESSSS! Fist Pump!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajmansell
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Driving past an antique store with my dad and he drops this gem...

β€œWhy do aunts get all the glory? What about uncle-tiques?”

πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ˜‘πŸ˜‘πŸ˜‘

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What note do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft.

A flat miner

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiger7971
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
🚨︎ report
My career counsellor keeps encouraging me to drop out.

Thanks to her, I’m graduating from Sky diving school.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Who's fluffy and often drops mad albums?

Kendrick Llama

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xXxHuntressxXx
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
My cell signal always drops when I work the front desk at work and I can't get calls.

Bad reception.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/melmia88
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are snakes so quiet when sucking on a cough drop?

Because of the anti-HISS-tamine

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/citrusguy9
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
*holds water bottle* You see this? *drops water bottle*

Waterfall

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vissthebeast
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the tree drop out of school?

He kept failing twigonometry.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
People that drop watches in toilets

Have shitty time

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kittygrl108
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Just wait until you hit the drop
πŸ‘︎ 220
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KetoSaiba
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I showed my friend my pond, including the best fishing spots and the place where the bank drops off...

I wish the First National would stop sending their packages to my pond's address...

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when two drops of dew are attracted to each other?

They get a due date.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VaiterZen
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the oak tree drop?

A-corny joke!

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ivory-Rose
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
If a man drops his watch in a toilet

he’s bound to have a shitty time

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mystichunterz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
How to tell the sex of an ant. Drop it in water. If it sinks, girl ant. If it floats....

Buoyant.

πŸ‘︎ 72
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Loidz45
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2020
🚨︎ report
That penny will drop!
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Professor_Jamie
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you drop your waffle at the beach?

A San Diego

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/genghisKHANNNNN
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when you drop a red hat in a blue ocean?

It gets wet

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WiiSexDolphin
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you hear when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?

A flat minor

πŸ‘︎ 121
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HolyMackerel14
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What happens when two rain drops fall in love?

They become rain-beaus.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Erbearlee
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I was carrying a bowl of chili from the kitchen and my dog ran in and caused me to drop the entire bowl on top of him, covering him in chili.

Now he’s a chili dog.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/superbrooke
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I just watched my wife trip and drop the pile of clothes she just ironed.

I watched it all unfold.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
An old man was telling his friend about his new hearing aid, "the greatest in the world!" "You can hear a pin drop."

Friend: Wow! What kind is it?

Old man: quarter past 2.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notagoodspelller
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I just saw my wife trip over and drop the basket of clothes she just ironed.

I watched it all unfold.

πŸ‘︎ 147
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report

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