He's lion
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
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What is a family of homosexual lions called?

Gay pride

πŸ‘︎ 226
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PhilScottStan
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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What's a lion's favorite color?

ROARange

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/babydluv21
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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Once upon a time a lion and a cheetah had a race . This is what happened.
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/radhikagi
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
What's the Lion King's favorite month?

DeSIMBA!

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emilliolongwood
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do big-game hunters mount their lions’ heads?

To mount the other end would be a catastrophe.

πŸ‘︎ 385
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πŸ‘€︎ u/friste
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
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My Dad’s sister got eaten by a lion with a long nose

It was an aunt-eater

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/geoswede
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
🚨︎ report
What does a lion call an antelope?

Fast food

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyfortaco
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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I guess the lion spotted a cheater
πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LittleHumle
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2020
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Why did the lion walk into the Chinese restaurant to get a haircut?

Because he wanted a low mane.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CMoy1980
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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Look at this lion ass
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/weirdhero7
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?

Claude.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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Natives of the African jungle, when avoiding predators, call the distance between you and a lion a β€˜wimb’

Because the lion in the jungle is always a wimb away.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dongwaffler
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Why is a lion never lonely?

Because he has his pride

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bookwing812
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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My grandfather had the heart of a lion

And a permanent ban from the nearby zoo

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jayraj77
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
My Grandfather has the heart of a lion

And a lifetime ban from the zoo

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheGregGreg
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the lion get his hair cut on his way to the Chinese restaurant?

Because he wanted a Lo Mein

πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I just catapulted a lion at the zoo

You would not believe the uproar.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MLaBolle
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
A cheetah and a lion are racing in Africa

After the cheetah easily wins, the lion complains: "Man, you're a cheetah" and the cheetah says: "Naw man you're a lion".

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the cannibalistic lion do when he went to apologize?

He swallowed his pride.

πŸ‘︎ 110
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
How does a lion become a cannibal?

He must first swallow his pride.

πŸ‘︎ 63
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
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For me, the urge to sing β€œThe Lion Sleeps Tonight” is always just a whim away...

...a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away...

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why da fuck did tha lion eat tha tightrope walker? He wanted er well-balanced meal!
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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I have the eye of a tiger and the heart of a lion

And a lifetime ban from the zoo

πŸ‘︎ 214
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know how badass lions are?

They became kings of the jungle without even living there

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustINCREDyble
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a vocal female lion?

Aurora.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drozzi007
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
I came so close to singing "the lion sleeps tonight"

I was only a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SgtHedgehog
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
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A polygamist lion walks into a bar with 3 of his wives: a giraffe, an ostrich and a llama. /r/Jokes/comments/jdou1c/…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/castironspheres
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you heard about the lions that escaped from the circus last night?

I heard they went straight to the juggler

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jagerjj
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do lions only mate in the summer?

Because the pride comes before the fall!

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SamwellBarley
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
🚨︎ report
My grandpa has the heart of a lion

And a lifetime ban from the zoo

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThaCrimsonChinn
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between a Sea Lion and a Seal?

"I o n"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/benhick92
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do lions get the energy they need?

from Li-ion batteries.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/phoqkhan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My old grandad has the heart of a lion.

And a lifetime ban from the zoo.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yankee9Niner
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
🚨︎ report
My grandfather has the heart of a lion...

...and a lifetime ban from the local zoo.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MacItaly
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I have the heart of a lion…

And a lifetime ban from the San Diego Zoo.

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Lion King

Simba knew that he might get hurt when he was moving slow. So he decided to Mufasa

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slymood
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do the lion not attack the farm?

He was a little bit sheepish.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ItIsYeDragon
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
My young cousin showed me a stuffed lion wearing a tux.

Told me it’s a β€œdandy-lion”.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BHarcade
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the giraffe say before being attacked by a lion?

Easy tiger!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
My son has the heart of a lion....

And a lifetime ban from the zoo!

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aka_Pineapple
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
🚨︎ report
A mountain lion has over 40 different names in English.
πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/69pussywrecker69
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2019
🚨︎ report
The urge to sing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" may come at any time

It's just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away

πŸ‘︎ 82
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
How can we be sure that the lion is king of the jungle?

He’s always liong.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ssj3dvp11
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?

Claude!

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
The sudden urge to sing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight"

is just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away...

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/2shoesnotfellows
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2020
🚨︎ report
For me, the urge to sing β€œThe Lion Sleeps Tonight” is always just a whim away...

a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away

πŸ‘︎ 14k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thegreatsorcerer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2019
🚨︎ report

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