Did you know that Africa has had no vampires since 1982?

That's the year that Toto blessed the rains there.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Can you name a country in Africa?

Well Kenya?

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
In Africa, every 60 seconds…

A minute passes

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call an expert wine taster from the horn of Africa?

A Somalier

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/peva3
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
🚨︎ report
A cheetah and a lion are racing in Africa

After the cheetah easily wins, the lion complains: "Man, you're a cheetah" and the cheetah says: "Naw man you're a lion".

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
My daughter said she can spell every country in Africa.

oh Kenya?

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoNotCool
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2020
🚨︎ report
A man has been arrested in South Africa for shooting a giant chess set

Goddamn those big game hunters

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PissYourTits
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I was wondering why there are so many stories about vampires in Europe, but not in Africa

and then I realized vampires are killed by holy water...they blessed the rains down in Africa

πŸ‘︎ 83
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πŸ‘€︎ u/John_Doez_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
🚨︎ report
So I was wondering why Vampires don't go to Africa

I found out they blessed the rains down in Africa

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thesaltyscarlet
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are the no Vampires in Africa?

The other day I was wondering why there are so many stories about vampires in Europe but none in Africa. Then I remembered holy water kills vampires. They bless the rains down in Africa.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThatLad077
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are there no Vampire stories that take place in Africa?

I thought about this for awhile, then it hit me that Vampires are weak to holy water. The rains are blessed down in Africa.

πŸ‘︎ 41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptainB_MANN
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I always thought it was weird that no one talks about demons in Africa.

Then I remembered-they bless the rains down in Africa.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_kermit
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
🚨︎ report
They say kids in Africa don’t get any food or water.

I mean, you can’t really blame them Kenya.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeadByNebula
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I was confused why there are so many stories about vampires in Europe, but not in Africa.

Then I remembered that vampires are killed by holy water.

They bless the rains down in Africa.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I want to hear 99 people sing 'Africa' by Toto.

It's something that a hundred men or more could never do...

πŸ‘︎ 206
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πŸ‘€︎ u/engineerwho_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
🚨︎ report
A geology/geography/aerodynamics study that a sandstorm in Africa can blow sand and dust as far as to even Florida

So anyways, I dust the grains down from africa

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Why don’t cats play poker in Africa?

Too many cheetahs.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GingerStorm83
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Cam a vampire go outside while it's raining in Africa

Their rains are blessed

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PROTOTALEthe2nd
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Ever wonder why there are a bunch of stories about vampires in Europe but not Africa?

It's because they bless the rains down in Africa.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Patabell
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I hear in Africa they tried an experiment where they blessed the rains

It was a Toto failure.

πŸ‘︎ 515
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2020
🚨︎ report
"What was that country in East Africa called again?"

U ganda, looking for an answer.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDoge55545
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the man say when his trip got cancelled to Africa?

Uganda be kinding me

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/i30cluy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2020
🚨︎ report
Standing in a lake in Africa.

I told my friend I was standing in a lake in Africa. He exclaimed to em "no you're not, your in de-Nile!" sorry all.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dkkgaming
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2020
🚨︎ report
I love Africa too
πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nexusoftheworld
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Did I tell you about my friend in Africa named Dwayne?

I haven't seen him in a while.

I miss Dwayne... down in Africa

πŸ‘︎ 38
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
🚨︎ report
My friends said that while in safari in Africa, his family was attacked by a herd of oxlike antelopes.

That's gnus to me!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
"Africa" by Toto isn't a country song.

It's a continent song.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/InterwebWeasel
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa..

A minute passes.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RogueOps
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the coolest animal of sub-Saharan Africa?

The hip Opotamus of course.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I didn't like Africa by Toto at first, or any of their other songs. But eventually I grew to really like them

I guess love isn't always on time

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dwrk92
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend boasted that he domesticates cats from Africa for a living. I stopped by his work, and he was working with house cats...

He's a lyin' tamer.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Where does Africa’s deadliest killer go to school?

A hippocampus.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SippinOnCoffee
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Between the free falling stock markets, the Covid 19 pandemic, and locusts in Africa, there is one silver lining.

At least tomorrow isn’t Friday the thirteen... yikes!

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Africa's days of the week

In Africa, every day is Thirstday.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Waapwgaming
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Once again the marathon winner hails from east Africa.

Kenya believe their dominance

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kamo3332
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Ever noticed that every market in Africa... is a black market
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/klatkasalowa5
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
🚨︎ report
A goose talking to duck at the local pond. β€œMy husbands gone away for a few weeks to Africa”. β€œOh really.” Says the the Duck β€œUganda?”...

β€œNo I’m a goose. My husband is a gander”

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cwwspurs
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2020
🚨︎ report
"Okay Fred, Shaggy and Daphne, can you name an animal that lives in Africa and has a large horn on its face?"

"Rhino!"

"We know you know the answer, Scooby, but it's not your turn."

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2017
🚨︎ report
I can’t believe Elon Musk is from South Africa

And not Madatgascar

πŸ‘︎ 679
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MiddleEarthGIS
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2018
🚨︎ report
Mario in africa
πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gimmetheloops
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you call a snowman in Africa?

Water.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AgrestPL
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2019
🚨︎ report
A new study is showing surprising advances in primate evolution: Dr. Thomas Ink, a researcher in southern Africa has found certain groups of apes 'brewing' alcohol by leaving old fruit to stand in water pools then drinking from it and becoming inebriated.

Dr. Ink has dubbed these 'Monkey Bars'.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pparten
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I blessed the drains down in Africa
πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iandouglas
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
A herd of wildebeests was ranging across Africa, destroying huts and missionaries...

When they were all killed, the newspaper headline read, "No gnus is good news!"

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Why can't you gamble in Africa?

Because there are too many Cheetahs!

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
🚨︎ report
"Okay Fred, Shaggy and Daphne, can you name an animal that lives in Africa and has a large horn on its face?" "Rhino!"

"We know you know the answer, but it's not your turn Scooby!"

πŸ‘︎ 198
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2019
🚨︎ report

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