Ever wonder why there are a bunch of stories about vampires in Europe but not Africa?
It's because they bless the rains down in Africa.
Why are cars in eastern Europe so clean?
Wife (we both live in the US): I have to make sure my work phone is on do not disturb mode before bed so I don’t get email notifications from co-workers in our office in Europe.
Me: Sure, because when they send email, they don’t care if you’re up.
Dad, I can't seem to spell the sovereign state in central Europe.
Dad: "That's because you have Spellczech turned off"
What do you call a luxury burger from Europe?
What do they call Bigfoot in Europe
Knock knock.... who’s there? Europe...... Europe who?...
Europe = You’re up
I was listening to music with my dad recently and we were taking turns playing songs. I played the song “time has come” by the band Europe, from the hot rod soundtrack (Hilarious movie btw). I pointed to my phone and said “Europe!”. My dad yelled “I’m up? Alright!” And started looking for the next song to play. I was like “No! EUROPE” and he was like “I KNOW, IM UP” and proceeded to play the next song. Afterward he said he was just fucking with me. A true dad moment. Thought you guys might appreciate.
Why was Nazi-ism so infectious in the middle of Europe?
Ive never been to central europe,
but I might czech it out.
What do you call a Europe album played on a turntable?
The Belorussian Premier League is the only Football league in Europe still playing matches, despite the COVID-19 pandemic.
I heard the atmosphere in their stadiums is contagious.
Europe is ahead of our time
What do they call Miley Cyrus in Europe?
What do you call Chinese food from Europe
“Dad, do all countries in Europe drive on the right?”
Dad: Yes, the Brits left.
What do they call Miley Cyrus in Europe?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Europe.
Europe who?
No, you’re a poo!
How did you know Satan was going to Europe?
The flight from SIN to HEL vanished in Finnair.
What do they call Miley Cyrus in europe?
What’s purple and sits on the western edge of Europe?
Why did the giant eat a country in Europe?
Eastern Europe produces a lot of techno, but it's primarily consumed by just one region:
I had to get out of the small hotel business in Europe.
It was a hostel work environment
Knock-knock / Who’s There? / Europe
Europe who?
No, YOU’RE a POO!!
What’s Miley Cyrus called in Europe?
What would happen if I ordered a hatchet from Europe and had it shipped?
I could have a foreign axe sent.
How is Europe like a frying pan?
It has Greece at the bottom
Since vampires are supposedly hurt by holy water, I always wondered why priests don’t just say a prayer over every storm cloud, kill the vampires from above. Then I realized why there are so many vampires from Europe...
Someone already blessed the rains down in Africa.
Saw this on r/europe and it deserves more upvotes than it has.
When we leave Europe, technically we'll be in...
*Wife approaching a roundabout* Wife: “These roundabouts are all over Europe.”
Me: “Sure makes it easy to get around.”
When Northern Europe was bartering for its land, all they wanted was a little something to Sweden the deal.
What do you call an Asian from europe?
How do you know whether anything's changed in Europe?
Is my old fireplace Eastern Europe?
As it is behind an iron curtain.
It's not that drivers in Europe are driving on the wrong side of the road...
They're just not driving on the right side either.
I believe if we had a race around the world, it should end in Europe...
I'm thinking of moving to Europe to study different types of bacteria.
I figure the best place to begin would be Germany.
The award as the most racist country in Europe goes to..
"Is it weird if I really like the mountains that separate Europe from Asia?"
Why does Dracula stay in Europe?
They blessed the rains in Africa!
Why does Miles Davis hate traveling in Europe?
because they keep calling him Kilometers Davis there
Do you know how they call bigfoot in Europe?
I asked my friend Miles if he was interested in knowing how his name is pronounced in Europe he said sure so I replied
What do you call a yardstick in Europe?
I play chess online with a guy that lives in a small land-locked country in Central Europe.
Which continent is smaller than Europe?
There's a little known country in central Europe that is ruled by a monarchy...
Not many people are aware of its existence but I assure that it is there all the same. The king of this little land faces a lot of difficulty. He wants to make his kingdom into a sovereign nation but unfortunately they do not have the infrastructure, population, or economy to do so. In fact, this small state is only known for a single export. Thanks to their proximity to some of the finest gold and other metals in the world but total lack of an ability to process those metals on a mass scale, they have been left with only one option. You know the saying; when life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Make lemonade they did. This tiny territory is renowned for creating the highest quality watches in the world. No expense is spared and their elite group of craftsmen train for their entire lives from childhood to produce these terrific timepieces. Men of great wealth and taste have been known to trade entire fortunes for just a single one of these watches; that is how valuable they are.
The
...
keep reading on reddit ➡
I flew home to Canada from Europe yesterday. I woke up this morning and said to my dad "my arms hurt. I'm not sure why. I feel like I worked out or something". Without skipping a beat, my dad:
"Huh. Must be from all that flying you did"
Tom Scott Joke: What do you call a timer set for when the title track of Europe's 1985 album will be played for the last time?
Its the final Final Countdown countdown.
They had to ban King Kong from Eastern Europe
He bounced too many Czechs.
My buddy was hotel-ling us how his trip to Europe was going
How do you tell someone from eastern Europe to have a look at something?
My friends kid said he wanted to go to europe to study abroad
I asked him what was wrong with the women here.
How is bacon like southern Europe?
It's got a lot of Greece in it.
Why did the caring farmer plant his crop in Africa, Europe, Asia, North America, South America, Australia and Antarctica?
He wanted to see world peas.
You know what they said in weather begotten 10th century Europe...
Vampires are killed by holy water right? So if that’s the case then why doesn’t someone just pray over the clouds so the rain kills them all? Now I realize why so many vampires were from Europe....
Someone already blessed the rains down in Africa
What do you call a finely chopped cabbage from Eastern Europe?
A U.S. Naval ship is sinking off the coast of Europe
As soon as they found out they were in trouble, they started over the radio, “Mayday, Mayday, We are Sinking, I repeat, We are sinking!”
A little while later the German Coast Guard responds, “ Allo, zis is zee German Coast Guard, Vat are you sinking about?”
A man tried smuggling sausage and vodka out of Europe and his luggage caught fire and they had to evacuate the plane.
The whole event was pretty terrible.
It's being called the Absolut-wurst-case scenario.
Are you from Europe?
Are you from Europe? because I couldn't help but Czech you out. Now now, I know I need to polish my techniques, but there is Norway I could resist.
Son: I'd love to go to Europe sometime.
Dad: You go all the time when you play baseball! UUUUUURRRRRR UUUPPP!
What do they call the hunger games in Europe
Battle Royale with cheese
Some bad dad jokes about Europe (very bad)
Germany has to be one of the smelliest countrys in Europe
-Its so bad they have a town called Cologne
Did you know France has a sibling that had a child?
-Neither did I but its the only explanation for Nice
Poland has this uncanny habit of not finishing its stories
-Warsaw what?
Belgium loves its greens
-City named Brussels gives it away
Everytime i tell anyone of these I need to laugh as the absolute cringe my girlfriend makes and then laugh through the pain of her hitting me whilst saying "Its just not funny".
Personally I love them and I thought i would share them with you.
What is the saddest part of eastern Europe?
Was flying over the Netherlands on a trip to Europe with my dad leans in all very seriously and whispers...
Where do Gerbil go on vacation?
Hamsterdam
I made friends with a guy from Central Europe on chess.com earlier
What is the tastiest bug in all of Europe?
I told my dad a semsester in Europe would be awesome and this is his response.
Me: Hey dad I'm thinking of studying abroad.
Dad: Just make sure its the right broad hahahahaha
A friend told me about her trip to Europe. On her first day there she had a very bad headache.
I said "That's probably from flying. Geese get those all the time. It's a migrating headache."
What do they call Miley Cyrus in Europe
What do they call Miley Cyrus in Europe?
What do they call Miley Cyrus in Europe?
How is Miley Cyrus called in Europe?
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