A list of puns related to "Zoo"
It was great. She’s a keeper.
The tips were huge
The only animal is a dog. It’s a shitzu.
No one ever addresses the elephant in the room.
The head veterinarian at a zoo noticed something alarming in a patient’s record. A monkey that had been a healthy weight at its last checkup was now recorded as being only half that.
Fearing for the monkey’s health, he went and saw it, expecting it to be sickly and skeletal. However, the monkey seemed totally normal. Confused told his staff to weigh the monkey again.
They did, but the number they reported was still astonishingly low. Sure it was a mistake, he went to weigh the monkey for himself. But when he put the monkey on the scale, it showed a number that was still far too low, and couldn’t possibly be right.
After a moment he spotted the problem: behind the scale was a grab bar on the wall, and the monkey had stealthily grabbed it with its tail, and was supporting some of its weight off the scale that way.
So the monkey's weight was fine, they just weren't paying attention to de tail.
It was a shitzu
"He was always looking down on me!"
....
It was a shitzu.
EDIT: For those who say it's "stolen", i had no idea. A friend of mine told me this one yesterday and i just had to post it. That's it :)
straightaway I knew he was a keeper
...Guess you could say the zoo keeper got bamboozled!
Before that nobody addressed the elephant in the womb.
He started pointing them out to me.
"Llama, llama, llama, llama, llama, chameleon."
++++++++++++++++++
I thought of this today while driving and smacked my wheel as I giggled. My girlfriend stared at me, bemused and confused.
I like it. I'm proud of myself.
I tried to bring it up but she didn't want to discuss the elephant in the room.
You would not believe the uproar.
Apparently they were Meringue-utans.
When I asked the keeper why, he said, "It was bread in captivity!"
None of them were Happy
i think it's bipolar
I hope they put the fence back because some of the animals got out.
It’s just a rough giraffe.
..and I knew She was a Keeper.
Then I realized, it was a shit zoo
Half an hour, same as the zebras.
It was otter chaos.
because there are too many cheetahs.
It’s a real Shih Tzu.
When she arrived at the zoo she went to see her manager and asked what she should do, the manager told her to first go feed the sharks, so she went off to feed them. Whilst she was shovelling the food into the pool a shark jumped out of the water and tried to bite her, as a reflex she hit the shark with the spade and the shark died. Worried about losing her job this soon the woman started brainstorming what to do, eventually she decided to feed the dead shark to the lions thereby removing all evidence and so that is what she did. Shaken but glad she had avoided detection the women went back to see her manager and asked if there was anything else that needed doing, she was told to go and clean out the monkey cage.. So off the woman went with a wheelbarrow and shovel to clean out the cage, as she was shovelling the poop into the barrow a monkey jumped down from the tree towards her! As a reflex reaction the women smashed the monkey with the spade and it lay dead. Thankfully she knew just what to do and so she threw the monkey into the lion cage. Shaken and ready to go home by now, the women went to see if there were any final jobs that needed doing: she was tasked with collecting the honey from the bees. So she got changed into her protective gear however she forgot to tuck in the back of her shirt so when it came to doing the bees, one particularly large bee came and stung her right on the behind! The woman screamed and started whacking the bees until many lay dead. By now she didn’t even have to think.. she collected the dead bees and threw them in the lion cage before going home for a quiet evening.
The next day there was a new lion in the lion cage. The new lion said to the other lions “so what’s the food like here??” The other lions responded...
“Actually it’s quite good. Yesterday we had FISH, CHIMPS and MUSHY BEES!”
About a year ago, my mom took me and my siblings to the zoo. I didn't really like it there though. In the whole zoo there was only 1 dog there.
Yeah, it was a shih tzu.
That shit was bananas.
It was a Shitzu.
It was a Shih Tzu.
It was a shih tzu.
It’s A Shitzu
The sign said bread in captivity
It was a Shit-Zu
Is a shitzhu
It was a shitzu
A shih tzu
The zookeeper told me it was bread in captivity.
It was otter chaos.
It was a Shih Tzu
It was a Shitzu.
The only animal there is dog. It's a shitzu.
It was bread in captivity.
It's a shitzu
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