πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DiamondComedy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 08 2014
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For my birthday my brother bought me an elephant for my room.

I said "Thanks." He said "Don't mention it."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BellaLugosisChips
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 15 2021
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What do you get when you mix an elephant and a rhino?

Hell if I know.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Djpowerline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 08 2021
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How do you get down from an elephant?

You can't. You can only get down from a duck.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EgonVector
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 06 2021
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How to catch an elephant

First.... You dig a big pit.

Like, a tiger pit, but big enough for an elephant.

Then, you fill it with leaves and debris and whatever...

Light the leaves on fire and let it burn all the way down to ash.

Next, open a can of peas (or fresh peas if you have them)...

Place the peas all along the outside of the pit, creating a ring around the whole thing...

That way, when the elephant goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ash-hole.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Boogie_feitzu
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 28 2021
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What type of undies do elephants prefer?

Trunks

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/THPSROCKS
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 20 2021
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An Entire Elephant
πŸ‘οΈŽ 114
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WankieTankie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 23 2021
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How do you turn a fox into an elephant?

Marry her. 😬

πŸ‘οΈŽ 37
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tinnber
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 03 2021
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What do you get when an Elephant sits on an Orange?

Orange squash.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ukm_array
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 25 2021
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What do you do if an elephant doesn’t fit in your car?

You pop the trunk

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jpaylay42016
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 18 2021
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Have you ever seen an elephant hiding in a tree?

Exactly. Because they're damn good at it!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 81
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AnEvilSunBro
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 05 2021
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What do you do to an elephant with three balls?

Walk him, then pitch to the rhino.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GoodChadAndUgly
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 04 2021
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Why can’t two elephants swim at the same time?

They only have a pair of trunks.

-my grandfather, just 5 minutes ago.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheCVisNih
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 20 2020
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What did the elephant say to the naked man?

How do you breathe through that little thing?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 327
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nocatmemes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 27 2021
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How do you call an elephant that does not matter?

An irrelephant

πŸ‘οΈŽ 31
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SoulScripter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 09 2021
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What do you call an evil elephant?

A helliphant.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LikeTheHurricane
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 16 2021
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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it?

Nothing, it just let out a little wine...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 177
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/enragedzebra13
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 04 2021
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Why don't you ever see elephants hiding in trees

because they are really good at it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sparty1234
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 08 2021
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What does an elephant and a giraffe have in common?

They both start with a β€œG”.

Elephant’s name is George.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rockphotog
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 25 2021
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Know why you never see an elephant hiding in a tree?

They're really good at it...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cub_Dom
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 30 2021
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What do you call an elephant that does not matter?

Irrelevant. Sorry just addressing the elephant in the room here.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/space0watch
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2021
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Why can't elephants use computers?

Because they're scared of the mouse.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 186
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SuperGrandPatzer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 19 2021
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What do you get if you cross elephant dung and a pygmy?

A little shit about 3 ft. tall

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 05 2021
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Why did the elephant go to jail?

He had a dead guy in his trunk.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jitney76
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2021
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What do you call an elephant with a stuffy nose?

Junk in the trunk.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pauly_pasqually
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 23 2021
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What do you call a beta elephant?

Alphan’t

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/onenightblunder
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 26 2021
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What do you give an elephant with diarrhea?

Plenty of room

πŸ‘οΈŽ 113
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pedestriandetector
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 04 2021
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My friend worked at the zoo to circumcise elephants, the pay was bad but...

The tips were huge

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MoreTITS
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 06 2020
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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant?

Twist its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/chairfairy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 26 2021
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How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Open the door

Put the elephant in

Close the door.

How do you put a lion in a refrigerator?

Open the door

Remove the elephant

put the lion in

Close the door

There was a meeting of all of the animals in the jungle. Who didn't show up?

The lion. He was still in the refrigerator.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LayThatPipe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 01 2021
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What does a shy elephant wear when he goes swimming?

A pair of long trunks.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WhatProtomolecule
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 15 2021
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How do you get down from an elephant?

You don’t, you get down from a goose

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Deathbysnusnubooboo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 21 2021
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What did Tarzan say when he saw elephants coming over the hill?

"Here come the elephants coming over the hill"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/joelaray
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 05 2021
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Dad: Why did the elephant climb the maple tree?

Daughter: (Studiously ignores him).

Dad: To eat some cherries.

Daughter: (Not looking up from her phone). Maple trees don't have cherries, Dad.

Dad: He brought his own.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 64
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RipKipley
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2020
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What do you get if you cross an elephant with a rhino?

Elephino (hell if I know)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jellio80
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 30 2021
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What do you get when you mix an elephant with a rhino?

Eliphino...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Remilius
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 04 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you get if you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros

Elephino

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tatorpig
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 31 2021
🚨︎ report
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in palm trees?

They’re good at it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 51
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cosmic_Fox_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter ?

An Irrelephant

πŸ‘οΈŽ 115
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 27 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?

Elif-ino

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Myrdn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2021
🚨︎ report
How to catch an elephant

Dig a big hole, Fill it with ashes, Sprinkle peas on top, When the elephant goes to take a pea, Kick it in the ash hole.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Advaldinho
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees?

Because they're really good at it!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 151
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VentilatedEgg
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 28 2020
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What do get if you cross an elephant and a rhino?

ELE-EF-I-NO

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/saykso62
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2021
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What do you do when an elephant has three balls?

Walk him, then pitch to the rhino. He’s a sucker for a curveball.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/doctor_boombot
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a rhino?

Elephino

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ZigZagAlien
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 27 2021
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I bought my friend an Elephant for her room...

She said "thanks". I said "don't mention it"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/studentadvisor101
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 08 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you kill a BLUE elephant?

Shoot it with a BLUE elephant gun. How do you kill a PINK elephant? . . . . Hold it's nose until it turns blue then shoot it with a BLUE elephant gun.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 85
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Binksamus
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report

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