There is a species of frog that can jump higher than a 3 story house

This is due to the frog's incredibly strong hind legs, and the fact that a house can't jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cornedbeefhash1
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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Owl jump on the barn-wagon

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Who

... who who?

How did you know I'm an owl! :o

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ramiel01
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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What happens when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence?

Utter destruction.

πŸ‘︎ 400
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sasha678910
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
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Why did the cow jump over the moon?

The cat played the fiddle terribly and the cow wanted to get away from it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VegetarianReaper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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I saw an insect that was trying to jump on a fat guy's chest again and again.

I think it's preying man tits.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
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Talking with my brother: β€œHey remember when we would see how far we could jump off the staircase?”

β€œThat just sounds like leaping off ledges with extra steps”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ovrlymm
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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Those Duke boys sure do like to jump their car over things...

... General Lee speaking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/djxiii
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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Why did the toilet paper jump of the building?

To quickly get to the bottom...

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
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Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?

Of course it can! A building can’t jump at all!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GoodChadAndUgly
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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What can you jump over that’s a hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/coadnamedalex
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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Did you know why a deer can jump higher than an average house?

Because an average house cannot jump!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/viky_boy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2020
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Why did the crazy Mexican jump on the train?

He had a loco motive.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nereothefinest
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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Who can jump higher than mountains?

Everyone, because mountains can't jump!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/runronnierun89
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
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"I'm going to jump in the shower"

Funny, most people sing in the shower.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThamilandryLFY
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
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How did the Himalayan man jump higher than mount Everest?

Well, that's easy. Mountains can't jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-taco-rice-
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
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A chap jumps out of an areoplane and his parachute fails to open.

On the way down he meets a chap with no parachute moving up wards. He shouts to him, Hey mate know anything about parachutes? The chap coming up shout No but do you know anything about gas cookers?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiger7971
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2020
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If you willingly jump in the river in Paris,

you must be in-Seine!

(Just thought of this the other day and forgot to post it before. Hope it hasn’t been done before.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Samsta36
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
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Why did the saylor jump into the water?

Because Y knot

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wafflemartini
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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What is the best vehicle to get a jump from?

A cargo van.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FatchRacall
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
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Two chefs are working on a meal, the first chef is caramelising onions when some spill out the pan, the second chef says β€œwhat happened? Onions can’t jump by themselves”

the first chef responds with β€œthey can if they’re spring onions”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thebiunicorn
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
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I can jump higher than a house

Houses can't jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mootmahsn
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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What’s green, has four legs, and is deadly when it jumps on you?

A billiards table

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pandacoat
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2020
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A physicist sees a man about to jump off of the Empire State Building...

He yells,” Don’t do it, you have too much potential”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MCVeteran69
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
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There was a film made about Dick Fosbury's high jump technique

It was a flop.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gc1998
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
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Can a Kangaroo Jump Higher Than A House?

No because the house can't fricking jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fiery_Leopard
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2020
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Why did the man refuse to jump out the window?

He didn't want to go through any pane.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pengwin34
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
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Did you hear about the man who invented a more efficient way to set up the high jump and pole vault?

He raised the bar.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trimofdoom
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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Can you jump higher than a house?

Of course you can! Houses can’t jump!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MommaBearSF
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2020
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What animal can jump higher than the Empire State Building?

They all can; the Empire State Building can't jump!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/robitsarecool
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
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Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?

Of course. houses can’t jump

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hatehatedate
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
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A Thomson’s Gazelle can jump higher than the average house

It can do this due to its powerful hind legs, and the fact that an average house cannot jump

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Xander725
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
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Did you know that the Average African Leopard can jump higher than a stop sign?

This is because as far as I know stop signs can’t jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_Cyberostrich_
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
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What do you get when a cow jumps over an electrified barbed-wire fence?

Udder destruction.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RealTheAsh
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2020
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Why didn't 4 jump into the pool?

Because they were 2^2

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πŸ‘€︎ u/f_tothe_p
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
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My car wouldn't start, so I tried to jump it.

Now I've got a dead battery and a bruised rib.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KairuSmairukon
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2020
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What breed of dog can jump higher than buildings?

Any dog. Buildings can’t jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
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I tried to jump rope to lose weight

But I always end up skipping it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EmpireStrikes1st
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2020
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Dad was too cheap to buy weed killer, so he made us kids jump on weeds to control them. He always told me:

Only you can stamp out domestic violets.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2020
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My neighbor tried to wager money on whether I could jump the row of bushes between our properties...

But I don't like to hedge my bets.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2020
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Can a Kangaroo jump higher then the Empire State Building?

Ofcourse it can. The Empire State Building can't jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sjoerd019
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
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What do you call it when a cow fails to jump over a barbed-wire fence?

Udder destruction

Probably a re-post, but I haven't seen it on here in quite a while

If you have seen it recently... I'm utterly sorry

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CryptoReaper5
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
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I've never been able to beat my school's high jump record and it keeps me up at night to this day...

I just can't get over it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/greatreference
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
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Always jump from a plane with a backup.

That's why they call them pair of chutes!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
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I was going to jump rope for exercise this am

But I ended up skipping it

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shaftdriven73
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
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I wanted to teach my goldfish to jump, so I took it to a lake in the mountains

But it turns out spring water is just false advertisement

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tDumFlumph
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
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Did you know a white-tail deer can jump higher than the average house?

This is due to its powerful hind legs and the fact the average house can't jump.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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White men cant jump but they can....
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Supermr2
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
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