As we were both on the rebound.
I expected a free fall.
A receding hare line
For a moment, I thought he was gone with the Schwinn.
“I forgot to feed the dog!”
Now I'm full of energy!
I think you should get off your high horse.
Dad: [pointing up at tall trees] “See those trees? Kid: “yeah?” Dad: “How much will you give me if I take off my shoes and jump over them?” Kid: [looking up at the trees] “There’s no way! A billion dollars!!!” Dad: [takes off shoes, puts them on the ground in front of him, jumps over shoes] “Pay up!”
Two clowns were watching the late evening news. The current news story was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump. The station then cut to a commercial.
The first clown said, “I bet you $20 he’s going to jump.”
The second clown replied “Okay, it’s a bet!”
(Back to newscast.) The man jumped.
The second clown, being a good sport, pulled out a twenty dollar bill and handed it to the other clown. “Okay. Here’s my $20.”
However, the first clown refused, saying “No, I can’t take it.”
The second clown replied, “I insist. I lost the bet fair and square.”
The first clown said, “I have a confession to make. I saw the same thing on the 6:00 news and knew he jumped. So it wasn’t really a fair bet.”
But the second clown replied, “I know. I saw the same newscast. But I didn’t think he would be stupid enough to jump twice!”
I don't think he was up for a grown man jumping off his shoulders.
this is due to its powerful hind legs and the fact that a house cannot jump.
I had to put him down.
(i meant into not info)
A broken rubber is the reason I was born. It’s not going to be the reason why I die.
It scares the shit out of the seeing eye dog.
It'll get you suspended.
His peers immediately recognized his vast experience exorcising.
I just want them to have stable lives.
She came out with this one today:
"I don't know why he jumped in front of the train, but he must have had a real loco motive."
One fell off and hit gis head. Mama called the doctor And the doctor said...
Dammit Jim I'm a Doctor not a zoologist!
"You know what that's called? Parfloor"
A receding hare line.
From my dad as we wait in a waiting room
Context: A friend and I were discussing jumping from rocks into the sea.
Friend: I was scared jumping from that height, and [another friend] jumped from much higher than I did. I don't know how he did it.
Me: Probably with his legs...
Me: "How's the water!?"
Dad: "It's wet!"
He said ‘don’t jump! You’ll slip!’
A receding hare line.