What do you call it when Batman skips church?
The nurse made my heart skip a beat
It was fine after she plugged the life support back in.
My wife was changing through channels on TV. She asked me if I skip, too.
I said, “No, running is faster.”
Why did the butterfly skip the school dance?
They heard it was a moth ball.
I tried to skip the line in the water park
But i got caught and they wouldnt let it slide
Why did the dad like to skip everywhere instead of walk?
He wanted to put his best foot forward
No matter how tired he is, Mel never skips confession.
Why do Uber drivers skip the gym ?
Because they don't even Lyft
I rang the council to see if I could have a skip outside my house
They said "You can do cartwheels and star jumps for all care!" And put the phone down
Found this on my skip. The underlining makes it especially punny.
When I was little and was asked to recite the alphabet I would always skip one letter. The teacher finally got fed up with me and asked,
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
DadJokes are proof that comedy skips a generation.
http://imgur.com/gallery/3GUE8
This was a group text from me to both of the kids. The younger was born exactly nine months from the Tuesday in question. The older one responded with a thumbs down.
why did we skip to 4k resolution?
Because 3k was a little too racist.....
For halloween, my daughter dressed up as Mary Poppins, and then asked me if she could just skip the vegan neighbor's house.
When I her asked why, she said it was because their "Stupid Cauliflower Licorice Tastes A Lot Like Dog Shit."
What type of snake never skips dessert?
Why did Windows and Apple skip 9?
My wife wanted me to skip my friend’s bbq to go to a play with her
Seems like a big missed-steak
I used to skip the first episode of every series because I have no interest in aerospace engineering
My wife always skips a letter when she sings the alphabet.
Why do you call a magnetic guy who skips school?
My son’s hot English tutor wanted to teach him how to write an essay... He told her let’s skip the introductions.
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