What do you call a vegetable that does hip hop?

A rap scallion.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2021
🚨︎ report
When Hop Sing died on Bonanza, what did they put on his headstone?

Hop Sang

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/siphodeus
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2021
🚨︎ report
What do you call an onion who sings hip-hop?

A Rap Scallion

πŸ‘︎ 38
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fading2black82
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2021
🚨︎ report
The hip hop elevator repairman fixed the lift.

He threw down on the up and up, yo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jester57
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2021
🚨︎ report
What can you say about a HIP-HOP ARTIST that performs the music of TODAY?

Santa Claus really likes him because he’s RAPPING the PRESENT.

(That joke was 2 punny)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SlickHeadSinger
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
🚨︎ report
When is the one time you can't dance to hip hop?

When you're waiting for your hip op

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sharpie65
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Me: I’m going to hop in the shower

Dad: Don’t hurt yourself!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/overtlysecretive
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
🚨︎ report
Q: What's the name of J.K. Rowling's hip-hop album?

A: Fantastic Beats and Where to Find Them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zjunkmale
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a hip-hop group made of bakers?

The Yeastie Boys

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AudenWolfe
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Where can I learn about hip-hop?

On the wiki-wiki-wiki.

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnnyrottenjr
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the mischievous green onion that sang hip hop?

He was a real rapscallion.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TrefoilHat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Mama Frog was really struggling with her youngest, Little Hop. He couldn’t seem to sit still!

That is, at least not long enough to learn any of the many, many important things a frog needs to learn in order to be a frog.

You see, a frog needs to be super slick in order to get by. A frog without proper skills, well, he may as well be a toad.

Anyways, every time Mama Frog went about trying to teach Little Hop something, he would just bounce.. and bounce.. and bounce..

And every time Mama Frog had reached her limit of patience, right before giving up, she’d say to Little Hop, β€œIf you keep on keepin’ on hoppin around all aimless, I’m gonna turn you into a toad!”

Which, upon hearing, Little Hop would stop his hop and settle. You see, he knew well enough that he wanted no part of being a toad.

Well, on one particular day, during one such lesson, Little Hop had taken again to bouncing here, and bouncing there - and just about everywhere besides a place he could listen! And on this same particular day, Mama Frog’s patience was worn real, real, thin, you see, and she got sudden filled with a terrible frustration.

And just like a firecracker went off, in a sudden snap, Mama Frog turned Little Hop straight into a toad!

And when it was done, Mama Frog looked at him direct, shook her head, and said..

β€œI toad you so.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/martianrome
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What can a hip hop battle rapper use for protection against the harshest rhymes?

Bubble rap

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πŸ‘€︎ u/uneeq33
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a hip hop Dinosaur?

A Raptor

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πŸ‘€︎ u/skyhighjams
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
🚨︎ report
People always ask me why I made a hip hop album about yogurt.

I tell them that I did it for the culture.

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πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Hop in
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πŸ‘€︎ u/absolutely_tired
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call existentialist hip-hop music?

Angsta Rap

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DreadMoor
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Hop in the shower v.redd.it/xp1r5miwj0d41
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SQUIDDYYYYY
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
🚨︎ report
While I was at the gym, I decided to hop on a treadmill.

People started giving me weird looks, so I started jogging instead.

πŸ‘︎ 495
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sp1cyRice
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
There's a new rap artist who combines a modern hip hop sound with 80s retro pop.

Waka Flocka Seagulls.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jDubbaYo
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a green onion that makes it big as a hip hop star?

A rapscallion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/t1m_b3nz3dr1n3-0
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the car hop?

It had one boot

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Octopus-Pawn
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the North Korean hip-hop crew that escaped to the south?

it was called Run DMZ.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cuank
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
How do hip-hop artists stay safe when traveling from country to country?

Bubble rap.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oranm91
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2018
🚨︎ report
I wanted to hop on the β€œmaking my own version of snoo” bandwagon

But I was too late, guess I snoos i lose.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JPKMoopie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I hop everyone has a hoppy Valentine’s Day!
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ileisen
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call someone who hops on a buck and rides away on it?

Deerly departed.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bearrunner44
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend just picked a fight with a fan of hip hop group Insane Clown Posse, who was with his friends.

They all attacked him, but he went straight for the Juggalo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sodrohu
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Wait...hops and barley make you smarter?

Well they made Bud wiser

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ChrisCGCToo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2019
🚨︎ report
A frog hops into the credit union and meets with his loan officer, Ms. Black. She asks if he has any collateral for the loan?

The frog pulls out a small weird shaped item, made of ceramic. Ms. Black isn’t sure what to make of it, so she asks her manager. He takes one look at the item, and says, β€œWhy that’s a knick knack Patty Black, give that frog a loan!”

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamkeerock
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Checking in at a hotel and the front desk agent tells me they don’t have a bell hop for the night.

I told her they should get the Nobel Prize.

She just stared at me blankly for 8 seconds until she said.... β€œcheck out is at 10”

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jbmusic501
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I bought my nephew a collection of hip-hop songs from Czechoslovakia.

It's a Bohemian Rap CD.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bundleofschtick
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2017
🚨︎ report
When I tell my dad, " I need to hop in the shower real quick before we leave the house".

Ok, but I'd rather you hop real slow. Bathroom falls account for the majority of home injuries.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cypressinn
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2014
🚨︎ report
Who was the best hip hop artist 65 million years ago?

Velocirapper

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DDuub
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2018
🚨︎ report
I keep trying to come up with a pun about hip hop dancing...

...but it's just not twerking. I hope everyone will just let this slide.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotted_Lady
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2018
🚨︎ report
Hops

Wife: You've been drinking beer. I smell it on your breath.

Husband: No, I've been eating frog legs. You're smelling the hops.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/harrywhoover
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Few people know Queen used to make hip hop tracks.

They had all sorts of bohemian Rap CDs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThisIce
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
I’m starting a vegetable based Hip Hop group.

We’re called the rap scallions.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pratojr
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Fiance: Beer is just water and hops.

Me: I wonder why it never played basketball....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ilovemygamgam
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2019
🚨︎ report
Just thought I would hop in to this subreddit.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheEasterPunny
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2015
🚨︎ report
What do you call a snake that’s into Hip-Hop?

A Raptile

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/smoothplatypus
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2018
🚨︎ report
A grasshopper hops into a bar, hops on a bar stool, and the bartender says, β€œHey, we got a drink named after you.”

The grasshopper responds, β€œNorman?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shadyood
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Just a few days left to join a hip-hop crew.

So you can make sure to do all the wrapping for the holidays.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/anxdiety
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2017
🚨︎ report
What do convicts and a hip hop artist's bed have in common?

They both have rap sheets.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cbritt11
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2017
🚨︎ report
[Request] Jokes about about a broken foot: (like) I heard you got a new job working at I Hop

A friend of mine broke her foot. She is wearing a boot now. Any jokes you have about broken feet or boots would be great.

Here are the ones I've been using:

-See you next fall

-I need to step up my jokes

-I heard you joined a gang...the Crip ples...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/1BBD
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2016
🚨︎ report
"Dad, I'm gonna hop in the shower."

Finally got to use this classic!

Kid: "Dad, I'm gonna hop in the shower."

Me: "You should probably just stand still, it's safer."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/elscorcho42
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2016
🚨︎ report
What is another name for a Hip Hop Onion?

A rapscallion.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DudeWithRedditAcc
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
While I was at the gym, I decided to hop on a treadmill.

People started giving me weird looks, so I started jogging instead.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2019
🚨︎ report

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