Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
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︎ Jan 15 2021
Dad to his son; βDo you want to hear a really good Batman impression!?β
Son; βGo on, then.β
Dad growls; βNOOOOO, NOT THE KRYPTONITE!β
Son; βThatβs Superman.β
Dad; βThanks, Iβve been practicing a lot.β
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︎ Oct 23 2020
My friend said, βMy kid refuses to eat fish. What do you think is a good replacement?β
Me: Cats. Cats love fish.
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︎ Dec 16 2020
What do you call a murderous clown whos good at investments?
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︎ Feb 09 2021
How do German bakers say βgood byeβ?
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︎ Jan 18 2021
What do you need to ride on when you say good bye to a king?
A bike. Because you say bye King.
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︎ Jan 31 2021
What do you call a hen thatβs good at arithmetic?
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︎ Dec 10 2020
I canβt do good work in Excel without getting compliments,
I really need the validation.
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︎ Jan 06 2021
what do you call a comedian that's not good or bad?
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︎ Dec 28 2020
Why do claustrophobic people make good employees?
They're good at thinking outside the box.
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︎ Jan 03 2021
What do you call it when a British person takes a good long look at something?
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︎ Dec 28 2020
Do you know why is it called bad-mintonπΈ and not good-minton? β’ Because it involves "RACKETS"
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︎ Nov 22 2020
What do you call a British guy when he has good manners, bad hygiene, and an affinity for word play?
PunGent
Tried posting in Dad jokes sub and I guess it was the wrong place for a triple pun.
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︎ Nov 15 2020
I made this video in good humor only... please do not take it as offense in any way, shape, or form!
Life as a Stay at Home Dad (honest humor nothing against Stay at Home Dads)
As as an aspiring father figure, I have the greatest respect for dads of every kind. In fact, much of this stems from the fact Iβve grown up from the age of 6 without a father of my own. I made this video as a comical representation of what I hope to be one day: a guy full of dad jokes and such humor.
Thank you for reading and enjoy!
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︎ Oct 29 2020
Why do marine biologists make good philosophers?
Because they spend their lives search for porpoise.
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︎ Oct 18 2020
Two monsters were at a party having a good time when one of them noticed a lady monster rolled her eyes at them. The monster asked his monster friend "what should I do?"
The other other monster replied "be a gentleman, roll them back to her."
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︎ Nov 02 2020
What do you call a good fisherman
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︎ Sep 24 2020
What do you call a selfie thatβs so good you put it in a frame?
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︎ Oct 25 2020
What do you call a horse thatβs up to no good?
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︎ Oct 28 2020
What do you call a dinosaur with good dental hygiene?
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︎ Sep 25 2020
My wife got me good and there was nothing I could do
I was playing with our toddler when for whatever reason Humpty Dumpty popped in my head. I started trying to think of a funny rhyme about Dumpty cracking open and being unable to pay for US medical care and thus now lives a pain-addled, poor life. Yeah, idk.
Anyway, I couldnβt think of the original second half of the rhyme and so I asked my wife. She told me the rhyme and I said thanks. After a short silence goes by she goes,
βWhat are you doing, trying to think of another lame dad yolk?β
I didnβt know my son had two dads but I know now
Edit: typos
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︎ Oct 21 2020
What do you call Vietnamese soup that is really, really good?
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︎ Sep 27 2020
Why do electricians make good music ?
They always have an extension chord
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︎ Aug 19 2020
I'm a teacher and I like to do superhero impressions before class to put students in a good mood.
The other day I told them I was going to do an imitation of Batman, so I started off with:
"Arghβ¦ kryptonite, getting weakerβ¦"
"THAT'S SUPERMAN!" a student in the back row yelled
"Thanks man, I've been practicing a lot", I replied.
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︎ Aug 01 2020
What do you call a cat that's always in a good mood ?
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︎ Sep 04 2020
Why Do Magicians Make Good High School Teachers?
They already know all of the trick questions.
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︎ Sep 18 2020
"Have you ever done anything good?" St. Peter asked a guy when he showed up at the Pearly Gates. "To protect a young girl I punched the leader of a motorcycle gang, kicked his bike over, and told them all to back off!" said the man. St. Peter was impressed, "When did you do this?"
"Oh, just a couple of minutes ago."
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︎ Sep 22 2019
What do you call a factory that only makes good products?
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︎ Jun 15 2020
What do you call houses who have good behavior?
π︎ 69
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︎ Jun 06 2020
What do you call it when your son has a really good comeback?
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︎ Aug 03 2020
What do you call a woman whoβs really good at catching fish?
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︎ May 22 2020
What do you call the village where Hobbits live that isnβt as good as the Shire but they make really good sloppy joes?
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︎ Jul 14 2020
What do you call a ginger kid whoβs good at martial arts?
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︎ Oct 20 2019
Do you know why pigs make really good cakes?
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︎ Jul 10 2020
What do FedExβs reputation and a good dad joke have in common?
Itβs all about the delivery man.
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︎ Jun 18 2020
What do you call a dinosaur that takes good care of his teeth?
π︎ 64
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︎ May 03 2020
What do you call a good breakfast?
Omelet you know in a little bit
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︎ Jun 10 2020
What do you call a good looking tractor?
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︎ Jul 29 2020
Why do pimps make good gardeners
They are used to garden hose
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︎ Jul 01 2020
Do you want the good news or the bad news?
The bad news is: theres no good news.
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︎ Jul 11 2020
Why do elements and chemicals make good real estate agents?
They have a lot of properties.
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︎ Jun 23 2020
What do you call an insect whoβs good in bed?
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︎ Jul 15 2020
Kid: spells 'greet' with an 'a'. "Did I do good on this?"
Dad: "No, you did great!"
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︎ May 05 2020
A man asks a professor, "Do you think Einstein's theory was good?"
The professor replies. "Relatively."
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︎ Apr 18 2020
My friend said, βMy kid refuses to eat fish. What do you think is a good replacement?β
βA catβ I said. βCats love fish.
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︎ Dec 18 2020
What do you call a man when he has good manners, bad hygiene, and an affinity for word play.
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︎ Nov 12 2020
What do you call a factory that sells good products?
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︎ Jul 23 2020
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