I entered 10 puns in a joke contest. I figured one of them would win...

But no pun in ten did.

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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me when I win an argument
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πŸ‘€︎ u/haphazard_hazard
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kat_GotYourTongue
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2021
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How do you win the heart of a female Farmer?

Attract her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/digiBeLow
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2021
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Who ever stops the extended warranty calls should win a prize.

I'm calling it The No-Bell Peace Prize.

Idc if you steal this I just thought of it while making lunch and I got another one of them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Barlark88
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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What do you call a chess club bragging about their wins in a hotel lobby?

Chessnuts boasting in an open foyer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
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My friend entered a contest to win a trip to a city on the French Riviera. He didn't win...

It was a Nice try tho.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2021
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A woman entered an online pun contest. She submitted ten different puns in the hope that at least one would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wolf_taylor
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
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Who always wins at the army quiz nights?

General Knowledge

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pjburnhill
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
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Why did the scarecrow win so many awards?

Because was out standing in his field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/userunknowned
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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Why did the ghost soccer team win all their games?

They were amazing at possessing the ball.

*My son's joke. I'm so proud.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ArcticTrek
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2020
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What happens if a cat wins a dog competition during a tornado?

A cathastrophy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/D4rk3rl1fe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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Why do British chess players always win?

Because their queen never dies

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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I was in the hotel lobby the other day when I heard 2 chess masters bragging about past wins.

They were chess nuts boasting in an open foyer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/superdolmiosauce
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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A man's son entered a raffle to win the deed to an entire shopping plaza.

The son's ticket number wasn't the one picked to win. Despondently, the son told the results to his dad. In an effort to console him, his dad replied..."Well, sorry son, but you can't win the mall."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kellzone
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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How does a vegetable win a fight ?

With carrot-y

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2020
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You know how they throw the ball into the crowd after they win the game?

Apparently, that's not allowed in bowling. I know that now.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EmBeeCSGO
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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A son tells his Dad he wants to win the limbo contest at his school...

His dad says, "That's a pretty low bar."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kellzone
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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I was really moved when I realized my mother let me win at cards.

It meant a great deal to me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Taco_Pie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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What do you win if you don't move a single muscle all week?

A trophy!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/joshually
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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Why can’t Satan’s cheerleading squad win any competitions?

Because they have literally no chants in Hell.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JiminyKirket
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
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Did you guys hear about the new Space Jam sequel where Marvin the Martian joins the Monstars, scores all of their points and they win it all?

You should check it out, it’s a really good Martian Scores’easy film

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AquamarineCheetah
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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Why do foot fetishist never win?

Because they love the taste of defeet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gildagert
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
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Why do news pundits care so much about who the people of Poland think will win the election?

I came up with this one today but I'm sure it's been done before. My wife said it's lame. What do you say?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuchSalad4
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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What do you win when you get a Darwin Award?

Mortal catas-trophy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/callmefinny
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
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Donald thinks he’ll win...

But Joe is Biden his time

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AndrewMacSydney
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
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With the crazy year 2020 has been, if Trump wins again would it be... arMAGAddon?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gr8ums
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
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Biden wins Michigan

Trump wins Michigone

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeeSeaBayBee
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
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What will Trump say if Biden wins?

Bi den

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryonnsan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
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Why did it take Joe so long to win the election?

He was Biden his time

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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They were never going to let my president win this election

But I'm not mad. He'll drop an album or two and Kanye will be back in 4 years.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SarcasmJedi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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Two chinese Christians are having a contest to see who can contact God the fastest. After one wins, the other looks at him and says

"Well prayed"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JCokeDaKilla
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
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If you win a Oscar Mayer weinermobile your are the

Weiner

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YouhaveLigma21
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2020
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And Jesus said "come forth and win the kingdom of heaven!"

But I came 5th and won a teapot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tiger7971
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
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How did Samuel win the work talent show at the mobile phone factory?

Sam sung

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vodkafountain
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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I sent 10 puns to a pun contest, hoping one would win

But no pun in ten did.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VisualEyez33
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

because he was out-standing in his field

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πŸ‘€︎ u/earthlightpd
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Delbadeaux
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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"Why did the scarecrow win an award?"

"Because he was outstanding in his field."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PersonWalker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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Why did the scarecrow win a Nobel prize?

He was out standing in his field.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TrayLaTrash
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2020
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"Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PersonWalker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2020
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Two chinese Christians are having a contest to see who can contact God the fastest. After one wins, the other looks at him and says

"Well prayed"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/runew0lf
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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What did the scarecrow win an award for?

He was outstanding in his field!

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/livinloud2015
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
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