Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella

Fo drizzle

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hobo_master3000
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 15 2021
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My 6 year old told me this one today. Why do dogs carry bones in their mouths?

Because they don't have pockets.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kristhebrown
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 14 2021
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Why did the nurse carry a red pen?

In case she needed to draw blood.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pka13
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 23 2021
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Maria gave birth to identical twins, named Amal, and Juan. She only carries one photo.

Because once you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MrsTrickyPig
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 30 2021
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My friend went completely bald years ago, but he still carries a comb with him...

He just can't part with it.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/snoopseanie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 01 2021
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My wife asked why I carry a gun in the house.

I told her decepticons. She laughed. I laughed. The toaster laughed. I shot the toaster.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 28 2021
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I had to carry a group of crows once.

It was murder on my back!

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ripMyTime0192
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 14 2021
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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella?

Fo'drizzle.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mama_Bear15
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 04 2021
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I can't carry 20l of petrol

But Jerry can.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/peterburk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 09 2021
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(True story): My dad carries a tiny 20$ note in his wallet with him wherever he goes. I asked him why...

(His actual answer): "because you always need to carry a little cash on you."

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Monster_NotWar
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 18 2021
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Caveman 1: "I've heard that a dinosaur won't hurt me if I carry a club. Is that true?"

Caveman 2: "That depends on how fast you carry the club."

(Yes, I'm aware of the anachronisms.)

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/wimpykidfan37
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 26 2021
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What do whales carry for protection?

Swordfish.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/moonpies4everyone
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 03 2021
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When my parents would go to the bar, my dad would always carry his drink to the table in his left hand and my mother’s in the other. I finally asked him why...

And he said, β€œBecause your mother is always right.”

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Uncle_Bug_Music
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2021
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Which Spice Girl can carry the most petrol?

Geri can

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pdew72
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2021
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Why Santa tell Mrs. Claus to carry an umbrella?

"Looks like rain dear"

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/I_Only_Have_One_Hand
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
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Dear people, don't carry your emotional baggage with you

I present you, the grief-case

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Schrodingers_liar
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 09 2020
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I always carry a picture of my wife and kids in my wallet.

I do it to remind myself why there is no money in there.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ksbalaji
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 04 2020
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I wasn't able to carry my case.
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HariyaManawari
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 09 2020
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To avoid bear attacks, carry little bells and pepper spray.

It’s also helpful to know the difference between black bear and grizzly bear dung. Black bear dung has plants and fruit material in it. Grizzly bear dung has little bells in it and smells like pepper spray.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cerebolic-parabellum
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 10 2020
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My German friend Hans got so drunk on American light beer we had to carry him to the truck to go home...

We had to hold Hans.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 08 2020
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What are the easiest mushrooms to carry?

Portobello mushrooms

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/buttengine
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 21 2020
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I always carry a pebble with me to throw at people who sing Christmas songs in October.

I call it my jingle bell rock.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jxwtf585
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2019
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Why do seals carry fish in their mouth?

Because they don't have pockets.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/D3V1L420
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 08 2020
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Why don't developers carry guns?

They have troubleshooting.

Edit: Wow! This really took off! I'm happy to have inspired so many grins, cringes, and chuckles!

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PickleFart69
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 04 2019
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I was helping my wife carry the grocery bags inside the house. All of the sudden she gets mad at me and says to carry more stuff.

I mean I would carry more but my hands were tide.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/vapingpigeon94
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 21 2020
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A friend of mine always carries around a scale with him no matter where he goes. Anytime he meets a new person named William he throws them right on the scale. So one day I finally asked, "why do you keep doing this?" He replied.

"because where there's a Will there's a weigh."

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DanGlerrBOY89
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 16 2020
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My mother's sister can carry 50 times her own weight

She's my aunt

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/forrestree
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 28 2020
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If you have to carry a heavy hen...

It becomes a Birden.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Crazy_and_lazy_Daisy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 09 2020
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I saw someone carry a large air conditioner to their car

Damn. What a unit.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/joyluck1a
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 07 2020
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Why did the nurse carry around a red pen?

Just incase she had to draw blood

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/1989JY_Ked
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 26 2021
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A friend of mine went bald years ago, but still carries around an old comb.

He just can't part with it.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DeltaOne211
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 19 2020
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I'm bald but I still carry around my comb...

I just can't part with it.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JimmyLoramAtWork
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 18 2021
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I asked Snoop Dogg why he carries an umbrella.

"Fo drizzle."

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kdlaz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 14 2021
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My buddy went bald years ago, but still carries around an old comb with him.

He just can't part with it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 74
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/habsfan1112
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 09 2021
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Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet.

Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Degtyrev
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 09 2020
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Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mum only carries one photo......

...... because if you’ve seen Juan you’ve seen Amal

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GrazingGiraffe
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2020
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My friend went bald years ago, but still carries his old comb with him.

He just can’t part with it.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 23 2020
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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella?

Fo'drizzle

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NoImNotChanningTatum
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 06 2021
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Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet.

Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/the_houser
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 09 2020
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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle β˜”οΈ

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RootbeerDreams
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 23 2020
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I lost all my hair years ago, but I still carry a comb.

I cant part with it.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 16 2020
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I always carry a picture of my wife and kids in my wallet.

Just to remind me why there's no money in there.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 10 2020
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo drizzle

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MrCheesecake69
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 19 2020
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I found out why nurses carry red crayons

In case they have to draw blood.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/33billings
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 16 2019
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Why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?

Fo drizzle

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/howell1812
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 18 2020
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I always carry a pebble with me to throw at people who sing Christmas songs in October.

I call it my jingle bell rock!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jxwtf585
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 31 2020
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I found out why nurses carry red crayons -

In case they have to draw blood.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sierrasport
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 17 2020
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I lost my hair years ago, but still carry a comb

i just cant part with it

πŸ‘οΈŽ 50
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/itscxrdonx
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 03 2020
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My buddy went bald years ago, but still carries around an old comb with him.

He just can’t part with it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 07 2019
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