A friend told me the local furniture store had some nice stools.
Upon closer inspection of their samples, I decided they were pieces of crap.
What does the word “stool” mean?
- Something you want to sit on
- Something you don’t want to sit on
Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs?
Because the cow has the udder
How can you be sure you want to buy a particular style of stool?
Why do cow milking stools have only 3 legs?
Cuz the Cow's got the udder!
Three stools walk into a bar
A horse walks into a bar and sits at a stool near the bartender. The bartender goes "Hi Horse, what can I get for you today?"
The horse looks at the bartender and says "Hey"
What's the best stool softener that everyone has been on at least once?
I could borrow the step-stool from my mom, OR i could go buy something taller.
Milking stools have a handle
It makes them easy to Moooo've
My doctor thanked me for submitting the minimum amount of feces for my stool sample
I told him it was the least I could doo
Doctor asked for a stool sample
What is the difference between a step stool and a 3D printer?
The former is a ladder, while the latter is a former.
Why did the stool quit his election campaign?
He didn’t have any backing !
Their doctor actually has a stool sample.
Using "step" stools to walk.
Pavlov is sitting at the bar, drinking a beer, when suddenly the phone rings. “Oh shit!” he yells, jumping off the stool.
“I forgot to feed the dog!”
My dad recently got a 3d printer and made a stool sample for his doctor
imgur.com/3jAlX9q
I refuse to submit a stool sample to my doctor
My wife ordered a stool form an online retailer
Wife: "It is arriving tomorrow."
Me: "If you do not like it, can we return it within 30 days?"
Wife: "Yes, why do you ask?"
Me: "Does that make it a stool sample then?"
Wife: "..."
True story, including her lack of enthusiasm for my obviously excellent sense of humor.
A guy at a bar asked "are you using all these stools?"
I asked, "What? Are you conducting a stool sample?"
He walked away, no words.
Why do milking stools only have three legs?
Because the cow has the udder.
(My dad just pulled this one out on us.)
Wow, that’s really high up there. I’m going to need either a ladder or a step stool.
Why does a stool for milking cows only have three legs?
The cow has the udder one. (Knee slap)
I just watched my coworker on top of a step stool, trying to fix a lightbulb.
He was climbing the corporate ladder.
What's brown and sits on a piano stool?
Beethoven's final movement
The doctor told me to have my stool examined
I didn't give a shit.
The lab wouldn't accept furniture anyway.
Did you hear about the dad that brought his doctor a stool sample?
It took me $200 to get my stool sample checked at the clinic.
Doctor asked for a stool sample
I just found out that the stool sample test my doctor recommended is going to cost me $200.
I added a "bookshelf" to a stool.
Why did the dad give away every stool in his house?
Because he was donating them to
chair-ity.
I brought a miniature stool to my doctors appointment.
I still don't know why he wanted a stool sample.
A grasshopper hops into a bar, hops on a bar stool, and the bartender says, “Hey, we got a drink named after you.”
The grasshopper responds, “Norman?”
Tyrion Lannister tends to gamble his meat and mead while sitting on tall stool...
That way the steaks are higher.
My mom bought my dad a new step stool
He told her it can try all it wants but it'll never be his real stool.
My 5 year old son went out to the kitchen, gets the step stool, and sets it up in the middle of the living room...
I'm sitting here on the couch watching him run back and forth across the room while he makes race car noises. After a few minutes, I ask him what he's doing.
He replies, "I'm passing stool!"
...What have I created?
Why does milking stool only have three legs?
Because the cow has the utter
Why do milking stools only have three legs?
Because the cow's got the udder!
Why do milking stools only have three legs?
Because the cow has the utter
What’s the difference between a step stool and a 3D printer
The former is a latter and the latter is a former
Why did milking stools only have 3 legs?
Because the cow has the udder (other).
Do you know why milking stools have three legs?
Because the cow has the udder.
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