Old pun, new format.
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︎ Jun 26 2020
2 old puns are better than 1, drawings by friend at work
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︎ Jun 16 2018
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︎ Jun 12 2015
From my 7yr old daughter: Why was the pig covered in ink?
Because he lived in a pen!
So very proud!
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︎ Feb 06 2021
An actual joke from my 8 year old - Why canβt you trust atoms?
They make up everything.
I was proud.
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︎ Jan 28 2021
What is an Air Fryer's favorite food? (Courtesy of my 6 year old)
Air-vrything.
I'm so proud.
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︎ Dec 26 2020
My 6 year old just told me this joke... What's stronger than a fortune cookie?
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︎ Dec 21 2020
I can't stop thinking about Bruce willis movies. I guess old habits
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︎ Jan 19 2021
From my 10 year old son: Why did the coffee taste like dirt?
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︎ Feb 06 2021
My 8 year old finished eating dinner
8yo: "There, I ate!"
Me [points at 9yo]: "Good job! She nine."
8yo: π€?
9yo: "Ugh. Because I'm nine and you're eight. You ate. I nine?"
8yo: "Daaaad!"
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︎ Feb 02 2021
What was Old MacDonald's favorite toy as a child?
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︎ Feb 06 2021
From my 8 year old: Dad, how do camels hide from predators?
Me: Their fur is the same color as the desert so they blend in.
Her: Exactly! They camel-flage!
I walked right into that one lol
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︎ Feb 02 2021
My 5 year old got me with this one:
5yo: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Me: Why?
5yo: To get to the dummy's house.
Me:...
5yo:...
Me:...
5yo: Knock Knock.
Me: Who's there?
5yo: The chicken.
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︎ Jan 20 2021
A friend of mine went bald years ago, but still carries around an old comb.
He just can't part with it.
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︎ Nov 19 2020
I said I was sad to have to go back to work on Monday after a long break. My four year old without missing a beat said...
Daddy, you're sad because it's SADurday.
I was so proud.
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︎ Jan 02 2021
From my 5 year old mind: βWhy is trash always sad ?β
Because itβs down in the dumps! π
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︎ Feb 07 2021
An original from my 5 year old daughter: Why was the egg itchy?
Because it had egg-zema.
She's suffered from eczema since she was a baby and I'm glad she can find humor in it.
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︎ Feb 06 2021
Because of his enormous debt, Old McDonald has to sell his farm.
To cover what he e-i-e-i owes.
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︎ Jan 05 2021
How do you buy a cat, if the pet store is closed.( Made by my 5 year old niece)
You buy it from the cat-alogue
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︎ Jan 21 2021
Thereβs two old men sitting on their front porch when a dog comes up and starts licking itβs junk
One of the old men goes, man I wish I could do that.
The other says, you canβt do that. That dogβll bite you.
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︎ Jan 31 2021
A darker one my 10 year old dropped on me... (possibly triggering)
She could see I was stressed out with work and she and I have a very dark sense of humour.
Hey Dad, you ok?
Yeah li'l beat just over worker and tired and stressed about the holidays.
"hey dad, lots of men struggle with mental health don't worry about it too much, Robin Williams and Kurt Cobain daughters turned out just fine."
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︎ Dec 23 2020
old but good
https://preview.redd.it/7mm8ep2i9ae61.png?width=525&format=png&auto=webp&s=c02148c24e2f9993886e9caa2c9ca7d4ce15b34f
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︎ Jan 29 2021
New joke from my 8 yr old
What sound does a tree make?
It barks
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︎ Jan 30 2021
What a grape idea for an old meme.
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︎ Jan 25 2021
My wife is pissed at me. I made hard boiled eggs for breakfast this morning and let our 2 year old help peel them and he made a mess
I have been walking on eggshells ever since.
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︎ Feb 01 2021
From my 7 year old - why was the egg covered in ink?
Because it was being ink-cubated
He came up with this one on his own after hearing another one on this sub.
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︎ Feb 07 2021
My 3 year old made this joke, I don't see it ever mentioned online
What is a cow's favorite drink?
A:a smoooothie
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︎ Feb 07 2021
From my 3yo: what do you call a 100-year-old ant?
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︎ Jan 22 2021
Which vegetable tells us how old a taxi is?
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︎ Jan 29 2021
Old Gold
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︎ Oct 09 2020
From my 10-year-old: "Daddy, what has it's bottom at the top?"
"I don't know, bud, what?"
"Your legs."
Well done, kid.
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︎ Oct 01 2020
Why was the 2 year old antivaxx kid depressed?
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︎ Feb 07 2021
Just got this one from my 90 year old grandma: when does a joke become a dad joke?
... when it is full groan!
(Glad she still has her sense of humor at her age; gives me hope for my future!)
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︎ Jan 22 2021
Proud dad moment: My five year old and I were discussing Halloween candy. I told him I like Kit-Kats.
He picked out a Butterfinger from his bag, held it up, and said βKit-Kats are good but these are butter.β
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︎ Nov 09 2020
What's orange and sounds like a Parrot? (courtesy of a 9 year old)
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︎ Jan 05 2021
The folks who live in my town arenβt allowed to be buried in the old cemetery on the edge of town.
Mostly because theyβre not dead yet.
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︎ Jan 30 2021
My girlfriend asked if we could have an old movie night and watch βGaslightβ
I told her βwe already watched that together, donβt you remember?β
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︎ Sep 14 2020
Ordering pizza with my 3 year old.
Me: do you want ranch or blue cheese?
3yr old: ranch is for horses
Little guy Caught me off guard lol
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︎ Jan 04 2021
Did you know Danny DeVito has a cousin from the old west?
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︎ Jan 12 2021
What do you call an old Russian female cat?
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︎ Jan 28 2021
My 5 year old got me (her dad) with a dad joke
Where do hamburgers go when they want to dance?
A meat ball!
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︎ Feb 07 2021
Today I got out-dad joked by a 2 year old
I asked my daughter if she was hungry and she said "No, I'm Charlotte".
I'm so proud of her, but also I had been waiting to do the whole hi hungry, I'm dad bit to her when I thought she was old enough to get it. Now I feel like I've missed that window
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︎ Aug 30 2020
Why do old pirates sometimes walk with a limp?
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︎ Jan 16 2021
My 4-year-old son has been learning Spanish all year and he still can't say the word, please.
which I think is poor for four.
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︎ Nov 28 2020
You know you're getting old when...
You go from hip-hopping, to hip popping.
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︎ Jan 05 2021
My 4 year old just told her first dad joke, and I've never been more proud.
My pregnant wife is wearing a white shirt that has a pumpkin painted over her belly, for Halloween. We are having another little girl, and have set on the name Ellie.
My daughter comes home, and is greeted by my wife.
4yo: "I like your shirt mama!
Wife: "Aww thank you! Do you like my pumpkin belly?
4yo: "...I like your pumpkin Ellie!"
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︎ Oct 31 2020
A joke from my 8 year old..
Did you know that 10+10 is the same as 11+11?
10+10 = twenty
11+11 = twenty too
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︎ Feb 02 2021
My 7 year old nephew showed me with pride the "telephone" he had just made from a string and two tin cans. I pulled out my iPhone and said, "That's nice, but..."
"Look at what kids your age make in China!"
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︎ Dec 25 2020
My buddy went bald years ago, but still carries around an old comb with him.
He just can't part with it.
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︎ Jan 09 2021
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